Falling [ 𝓚.𝓥 ]

"𝐁𝐥𝐚𝐜𝐤 𝐎𝐫𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐝"

Being from a family of blood wealth and crime had its perks, but like everything else in the world it always had its consequences. Sometimes I'd find myself lying on my bed, wishing I was a girl in Dublin who spent her time by the sea, and would give up her precious weekends to play the Fiddle in an Irish band while sneaking into a pub at 17 with not a single care in the world. But that was someone else's life- my life meant there was a reputation to be held and I wouldn't destroy the Astor name.
It was difficult, sleeping that night. I tossed and turned, gripping onto the duvet to feel a sense of security. It felt alien being in a new house with a whole other family I knew nothing about. I wished things could have turned out differently- perhaps I could've forced a reason for me to move out of my family home to avoid the marriage. I spent the night thinking about all the possible ways I could have avoided the marriage, but for some reason my family would always some how win. My life felt like it jumped right out of a Shakespeare play- where a woman's voice was never heard yet she was so privileged. If I had to pick my life as a Shakespeare play, I wouldn't let it be like The Taming Of The Shrew, where Katherina was stubborn and fiery, but her forced husband Petruchio spent his time "fixing" her by depriving her of her human necessaties. I may be quiet, but I had standards.
Or perhaps in The Merchant Of Venice, Portia had no say in who she was to marry, only 3 men had to select the correct crate containing a portrait of her.
All these plays had left women with no choice and my life felt like a modern day Shakespeare play, except it was only partially illegal. I stood awkwardly infront of the floor length mirror, staring into my reflection. I looked fragile, almost. Like even the slightest touch would knock me off of my feet. I brushed my left hand slowly along my chest, hating how wide my torso was and how big my thighs were. I quickly brushed away the thought when I heard a knock on my door. It was quick, and before I could respond the door was already pushed open, to reveal a tall, slender woman with bright red hair, Felicia.
She didn't bother to close the door behind her, but instead walked around my room with her cane in hand. There was no complete way to describe Felicia, she always gave someone an unfamiliar feeling when she was present. She was a tall and slender woman, with messy red curled hair often let down. Her choice of fashion was extremely different to my own mother's- who was often found wearing expensive gowns and dressed elegantly. Felicia wore beautiful jewlerry and dresses, but some how, they didn't go together. She wore a royal purple satin blouse with the first two button undone, and she paired it with a deep black, past the knee length pencil skirt, styled with a pair of cream coloured valentinos. Her jewellery consisted of pearls and diamonds from a pearl choker and diamond tennis bracelets and earring. Her choice of clothing was excellent, but they never looked put together.
"Your mother is downstairs, as are your brothers" she said, as she turned to face the window.
"Thank you for telling me" I responded, unsure as to why she hasn't left yet.
She finally turned around again and banged her skull headed cane onto the wooden floor.
"Dress nicely, not like a slut. You are marrying my son and not the rest of the men downstairs" she hissed.
The men downstairs would be my brothers and Fransisco, what men? I thought to myself.
She walked to see her way out, but slightly pushed me while doing so. I didn't understand why she has hatred towards me, and why she was so possibly threatened that I was going to fail to make her son happy. I couldn't give a shit.
I turned back to face the mirror, but only this time opening the wardrobe door. I fished through each of my outfits, trying to not dress like a "slut".
Eventually, I decided on a semi transparent white corset, matched with classy black trousers. I decided on white Saint Laurents, and chose to wear gold bangles, a few rings and small gold hoop  earrings. I completed my outfit with a thin black choker and my hair straightened and left down. I decided to spray myself with Tom Ford's Black Orchid. I was finally done, and strutted my way downstairs knowing how badly it was going to piss off Felicia.