You & I・❥・(Graham Coxon)

The End・❥・

(A/n): This chapter is longer than usual since it's the last one and i am also doing a authors note before it instead of at the end. anyways, enjoy this long and interesting read xx)

Graham POV

the dim yet piercing lights seem to penetrate thru my skull in the form of a blaring headache and dazed vision. the cheers of the crowd are muffled in my mind which is cluttered with memories of the conversation i had with damon before this show.

"our manager is right you being seen with violet again- it's quite messy. it's not something you should be doing, perhaps." he says to me.

"our manager isn't right! if anything he's a knob!"

damon sighs and looks into my eyes, "i don't care about it being a 'PR nightmare' or whatever. i am concerned regarding you personally seeing violet again. whenever you get involved with her, i find you to be messy and self destructive-"

my head feels heavy and i don't know where the stage starts or ends and where are the edges? i am losing concept of time and space both. i close my eyes and regain my breath for a moment, playing guitar merely off memory. i don't even know if i am messing up or not. 

am i drunk or done being drunk - hungover? i can't tell that either.

"last time you were drinking because you grew jealous of liam- and now you are doing the same thing, the reason? i don't know mate but you are back on your excessive drinking habits again. it's a bad cycle"

i reply, "but- it's not violet's fault, i just feel anxious about everything."

after a short pause he utters, "what about liam? is she still with him? what happened with the violet and liam situation, we never found out. is she hiding things from you? is she leading you on gra?"

there's a suffocating pain in my chest and an even more suffocating thought intruding my mind. violet. every vein in my body intermingles with worry all of a sudden.

i shouldn't have left her alone. i want to be with her right now. is she okay? what is she even doing at her flat? i really really really regret leaving yesterday. she admitted to having an eating disorder, next step was me talking to her about getting treatment but instead i fell asleep and came here today morning. 

i feel this force in my body that makes me do things, it's in control not me. i take a breath, look around for a moment then just walk out of stage. our manager and everyone else backstage is giving me looks and asking me questions but i don't stop for anyone. 

i leave to get a bus back to london, right then and there.

the room goes silent and he sits next to me to place a hand on my shoulder. 

"i am your mate, i'd never bad mouth someone you like and i don't hate violet at all. i am just making sure that you don't get hurt again because of her. be careful. go talk to her whenever you can." he explains.

-

determined yet sway and unsteady with some booze that i recently got from my usual pub back at the streets of london- that's how i am walking down to violet's flat. it's near i can feel it and one more thing i feel is soreness in my legs and back and the rest of my body.

i guzzle the alcohol but it barely accepts to go down my throat. i can't eat, drink, sleep or walk. the street lights interfere with my vision, it's painful. worry is consuming me dry. if i don't get ti violet's flat in the next thirty seconds i will die or maybe she will!

her eating disorder was the only thing i had to worry about but now i have one new thing - liam!

Violet POV