𝑬𝒓𝒆𝒔 𝑴í𝒂 | ᴮᵒʸ ᴹᵉᵉᵗˢ ᵂᵒʳˡᵈ

5: Aerosmith and Awards

"I have graded last week's geography examination." Mr. Feeny announced. "And the highest score was achieved by-" Cory cut him off.

"Minkus! Was it achieved by Minkus? Does it go to Minkus? Minkus, right?" Cory said. It was always none other than the teacher's pet, Minkus. "Mr. Minkus." Mr. Feeny said as he handed Minkus his test. "That's a shock!" Cory said sarcastically.

"Thank you, Mr. Feeny. Your bonus question was a real stumper!" I balled up paper and gave it to Shawn to throw in the trash, but instead, he threw it at Minkus. "Ow." Minkus said. I guess that was better than throwing it in the garbage. Mr. Feeny began handing back out tests. "Miss Owens, excellent. Mr Baker, very nice."

He paused when he went to hand Cory his test. "Mr. Matthews... well there it is." Cory grabbed his test. "A "C"? But I actually studied for this test! Why'd I get a "C"?" Cory asked Mr. Feeny. "Let's see. Where to begin." Mr. Feeny opened Cory's test. "Well for one this, Mr. Matthews. This section of the map is not East Germany." "It's not?" "Perhaps you heard of a little incident with the Berlin Wall?" "Was that during baseball season?" Cory asked. "There is no East Germany anymore." Mr. Feeny said.

"But the textbook says it's right next to West Germany." Cory replied. "Yes, well, the textbook also says that Alaska and Hawaii will make fine states someday." Mr. Feeny continued to hand out tests. "Things change, Mr. Matthews." Mr. Feeny handed me my test.

I got an A! "Unfortunately the Board of Education doesn't have the funds to keep up." Mr. Feeny handed Shawn his test. "Then how am I supposed to keep up?" Cory asked. "Watch the news. Pay attention in class. Look at the mimeographs I give you before you turn them into paper airplanes." Mr. Feeny suggested.

Shawn then threw a paper airplane at Minkus. "What good would it do? They keep changing geography. Why can't it be like all the other subjects? Math- 2 plus 2 is always 4!" Mr. Feeny looked annoyed. "Uh, science- the earth always goes around the sun. History- Lincoln always gets shot in the head." Cory said. Mr Feeny turned around. "Lincoln got off easy." He said as he walked away. I agree.

For the last 15 minutes of class, we read our textbooks. Shawn opted to make paper airplanes. He stored them in his backpack. "Alright heads up!" Mr. Feeny said. "In these last few moments of class, I want to make an announcement about this year's regional geography tournament."

Here we go. "As some of you may know, for the past five years, I have always fielded a champion, and I expect to do the same this year." Shawn and Cory started playing rock-paper-scissors. "So, based on his outstanding scholastic achievement, I have selected as this year's entrant-" Cory cut Mr. Feeny off again.

"Minkus. Have you selected Minkus?" Cory said. Mr. Feeny looked annoyed and done with Cory. He threw his hands up a bit, pointing to Minkus. "Mr. Minkus." He said, then walked back over to his desk. "And this year's first prize will be..." Mr Feeny said, reaching under his desk.

"A mercator projector pull-down wall map?" Minkus asked. What even is that? "No, uh, this year's winner will be bat boy at the opening game of the world series." Mr. Feeny announced.

Minkus was disappointed, but I was kind of excited, and I wasn't even picked! Imagine giving bats to all those cute baseball players! Cory and Shawn both perked up. Cory turned around to Shawn and I. "Did you hear that?" He asked.

"Yeah, so?" Shawn asked. "So, I'm seeing my dream come true here!" Cory said. "Oh, right, like Feeny's going to take you to the geography tournament. You didn't even know they tore down the Berlitz wall!" Shawn said.

"You mean the Berlin wall?" I asked. "Same thing." Shawn replied. "Not even close." The bell rang loudly dismissing us. Cory got up and walked over to Feeny. Shawn and I left.