𝑬𝒓𝒆𝒔 𝑴í𝒂 | ᴮᵒʸ ᴹᵉᵉᵗˢ ᵂᵒʳˡᵈ

12: Cheaters Belong in Vegas

"Al washes a car in six minutes. Fred washes the same car in eight minutes. How long will it take Al and Fred to wash the car together?" Mr. Feeny asked.

"Piece of cake." Cory said. Mr. Feeny put his hand up. "Think about it, Mr. Matthews." "I don't have to think about it, Mr. Feeny. It's simple." "It is anything but simple, Mr. Matthews." "But I've got the answer." "I'm not interested in the answer." "Why not?" "Because I'm more interested in how you arrive at the answer, and you couldn't possibly have arrived at the correct answer so rapidly." "But I did. I arrived. I'm here. I'm ahead of ya!" Cory replied.

"Oh, well, then if you're ahead of me, what is the answer?" "Seven." "Seven." Cory and Mr. Feeny said at the same time. "That's not the correct answer." Mr. Feeny told him. "But it has to be. Al speeds Fred up. Fred slows Al down. So the answer is halfway between six and eight. Seven." Cory explained. "That is not the correct answer." "That is not the correct answer." Cory and Mr. Feeny said at the same time again. "But it has to be." Minkus climbed out of his seat.

"No, it doesn't." "Why not?" "Fred can't slow Al down even if Al washes most of the car, and Fred just washes the hubcap. The total time still has to be faster than Al's time alone. You with me?" Minkus pulled out his calculator and started putting in numbers. "So, if Fred is twenty-five percent slower than Al, then twenty-five percent of six minutes is..." Minkus looked around. "Anybody?" No one answered. "It's a minute and a half which leaves us with four point five. Four and a half minutes is the correct answer." Minkus turned back to face Mr. Feeny. "Hold your applause, please." I rolled my eyes, and Minkus sat back down. "Mr. Minkus, you're wrong." Mr. Feeny said. "Wrong? As in, not right?" Minkus said.

Wait, wait, wait. Minkus, Stuart Minkus is wrong? This is the greatest day of my life! I must be dreaming. There is no possible way. "You know the law of averages better than I do. It was bound to catch up with you." Minkus got upset and got out of his seat again and headed to the door. "Where are you going?" Mr. Feeny asked. "Nurse. Minkus answered. We all watched as Minkus left.

"Minkus, you're wrong." Shawn said, quoting Mr. Feeny. "I've been waiting to hear those words since pre-school." Cory said.

"This has to be a dream." I said. "A really great dream." I said with a smile of disbelief. "Does anybody else have any thoughts on this problem?" Mr. Feeny asked.

"Om..." Topanga started acting weird and had her head turned towards the ceiling. "I'm channeling the ancient Egyptian mathematician who first solved this problem." Shawn, Cory, and I looked up. Topanga started making gurgling noises. Shawn snapped his fingers. "Check please!" He said. "Alright, Ms. Lawrence, let's see what you've come up with." Mr. Feeny said, looking at Topanga's paper. "Well, oddly enough, you and your metaphysical lab partner have arrived at the correct answer." Huh? "Let me see that." Cory grabbed her shoulder to see her paper, but she turned around and growled at him. Cory patted her head. "Nice, demon." He said.

Mr. Feeny picked up the paper. "Interesting, isn't it, Mr. Matthews?" He said. "Mr. Minkus didn't get the correct answer, but Ms. Lawrence did. You would do well to consider that." "She's cheating. She copies off dead guys."

♥

"Okay, we've got everything right in front of us. We got a car, we got water, we got brushes. We got Al, and we got Malibu Fred." Cory said, holding two of Morgan's dolls.

"Minkus got it wrong!" Shawn said. "It's not like it's just an assignment anymore. It's like a mystery." Cory said.

"And he couldn't stand being wrong. I mean, did you see him? He went to the nurse and never came back." I said. "But Topanga got it right. That is a clue." Cory said. "Okay, so, what's the difference between Minkus and Topanga?" Shawn asked. "Alright, Minkus is really smart." Cory said. "And really weird." I replied. "Now; Topanga on the other hand, is really weird." "And really weird." Shawn said.