Eclipse

Chapter 20

Place: Lost

Time: Sometime

"Vahn?" Tamara said aloud, getting up off the elevator floor.

Light poured in from the elevator exit, nearly blinding her after taking a quick nap. Disoriented, she retrieved her weapons and placed them back on her hip, ready to face the unknown.

"Vahn, where are you?" she asked again, shielding her eyes as she stepped through the threshold of the elevator.

There was a warmth to the light, her skin feeling energized by the rays beating down on her. She knew this feeling, and it wasn't possible inside a building unless she was near a window. Adding to the perplexity, she heard cheerful screaming and laughter all around her.

Her eyes finally adjusted and allowed her to survey her surroundings. She was outside. In front of her was a swing set with several kids playing on it, and kids running around all around her. The elevator was no longer behind her; instead, what she found were trees and playground equipment. Sand covered the tips of her shoes, sunlight beamed down overhead, with the odd cloud scattered about the sky.

"What the hell?" she said quietly to herself, trying not to let the kids hear her swear.

One kid stood out to her, a young girl with beautiful flowing hair sitting on an old-style merry-go-round. She was crying, her face in her hands. Tamara felt drawn to this one, something deep inside of her.

She walked over and knelt down in front of her, placing her hands on the child's knees. The child stopped and looked up at her, her eyes swollen from the tears. What Tamara saw shocked her; she was staring at herself, but much younger.

"What's wrong, little girl?" Tamara asked softly.

Through the tears, Tamara was able to interpret, "My friend left and played with the new kids."

Tamara felt a pain in her heart; she could never keep friends as a kid, they were always leaving her for something else. The little girl pointed to a group of kids playing together, having a great time taking turns on the slides. It hurt her to see this.

"They even made fun of me," the girl sobbed. "They called me street trash, look at the ugly garbage clothes you wear!" She placed her face back in her hands and cried some more.

"My mom would take us to the thrift store and always bought the most hideous clothes for me, never letting me choose what I wanted. To make matters worse, she would adjust the clothes for the summer, cutting long pants into shorts and long sleeves into short sleeves. We were poor, but we had to spend every penny wisely," Tamara thought through the pain of her childhood.

"Even young, just getting into high school, I was able to find a part-time job and pay for my new clothes. I had only just managed to buy the clothes that everyone else was wearing, so I could fit in. Last year was my first year I made it into cheerleading, and I finally had friends who respected me," she felt disgusted with herself.

"Last year, I became what everyone wanted me to become, to be popular, I changed myself. To make friends, I changed myself. Who am I really?"

"I tried to show them what I could do. I twisted and twirled, and even did a backflip." A grin touched the little girl's face ever so slightly. "Then they called me a show-off and pushed me down."

"I remember. I was a show-off. I loved to do gymnastics even before I got into cheerleading; I wanted to show everyone."

Tamara looked the girl over, trying desperately to think of something positive to say.

"You don't need those people, little one. They left you. It's their loss that they don't want to be your friend. You're beautiful and strong," she tried to coax.