Madder than a Hatter (Descendants)

The Mad Hatter (Edited)

"Hey, are you asleep?"

"Ah, yes. I'm wearing jeans, a watch, and my hair is pulled back. I must be in a REM cycle," I said dryly, opening my eyes and taking off my headphones. "What're you doing here, Dizzy?"

"Your wifi is faster than mine. I need to do my homework. Can I come in?"

"Yeah, sure. School wifi sucks. I know Evie would be delighted to see you, so go say hi when you're done. Also, I think the fast internet has something to do with Evie. It's her superpower. She has the power to make the internet faster wherever she goes. I have a superpower, too."

"Oh, cool. What is it?" Dizzy asked, sitting down in one of my oversized chairs and opening her textbook.

"Constant nausea." I pulled a can of soda out of my pocket. "Want one?"

"Yes, please."

I handed a can to her and then pulled out a second one, then a third. "I have a question that I should ask another adult, but unfortunately, I am too scared to ask another adult, so you will have suffice. If I'm feeling an overwhelming amount of guilt for no reason, should I talk to a therapist?"

"Depends. Why are you feeling guilty?"

"I just said it was for no reason. I am a coward playing the tune of a revolutionary, and that tune is the Barney theme song."

"Yeah, you should see someone. Just in case, y'know?"

"You are very wise, small one. Now, I've been awake for the last forty-eight hours for some reason, and I've heard sleep is good for you, so I'm going to try that out. Later, of course. I have things I need to do."

"Okay, be careful," Dizzy said. "When will you be back?"

"I will. I'll send you a postcard or something. Bye-bye, kiddo. Also, I'm going out the window, so don't forget to lock it."

"I won't."

"Lock it!"

"I will!"

I went skipping out into the woods, eager to get to the castle before Uma got tired of waiting for me.

Jay and Gil had already left on their tour of the world, and Mal and Ben's wedding date was growing ever closer. I planned to miss the wedding itself, show up at the dinner, and lie to everyone about being there the whole time.

Unless Uma wanted to be there, in which case I would change my plans.

I was confident in both of our abilities to murder someone in a confined space with only a second's notice, so I wasn't all that worried about asking her to take a trip with me. Well, two trips, but the second one was less important to me.

I was also confident in both of our abilities to handle psychological threats as well as physical ones, because any Isle kid worth their salt knew there was more than one way to hurt someone.

Uma was waiting for me by the bridge, although I didn't realize that until I had walked around the perimeter of the castle twice and had someone tell me where she was.

She looked up at me as I approached, and smirked at my disheveled appearance. "Took you long enough," she called. "What'd you do, go on a quest?"

"Yes, to get to you. You're my best reward. Now, time to start a new quest. Thanks for the moral support, by the way."

"No problem. You're an interesting critter. Why do you want to go back to the Isle, anyway? You fit in just fine anywhere."

That was a strange thing that no one had anticipated. Some people had decided to stay on the Isle and continue living there. Admittedly, the quality of living had improved greatly, and the air was now clean and breathable, which was a major bonus.