Because of You

Wire$

Vern's POV

I walked back to car in the pouring rain. I don't know how long I sat there staring at Lena's grave. I was soaked but it didn't really matter, I was starting to feel numb again. That feeling scares me. I don't wanna be just a lifeless feeling less person but it's just really hard.

I followed the streets back to our house where everyone is for the reception. I don't want to talk to anyone, I just want to be left alone. I'm sure my wishes won't be granted.

I hop and the car and walk towards the house. The door opens and there are many people walking around talking and being social. Jesse sees me and walks toward me, seeing as I had been gone for about two hours. I instantly hug him and he hugs me back tightly, sometimes I wonder what I would do if I didn't have him. He was my sun when times were dark. And times had been dark for a while now.

I told him I would be fine to go off with his friends. I didn't like him seeing me upset, because it made him upset. And then my guilt just multiplied. I don't deserve him. He deserves someone whose happy and full of joy, gorgeous and funny. Not an unattractive depressing girl who can't control her feelings. I shook the sad thoughts from my head, lord knows I already had plenty of those.

I walked over to the couch and sat down, looking at a thick book on the table. I grabbed it and as soon as I opened the page I regretted it. It was a book of all our band photos of times on the road, and one moment stood out more than the others.

*Flashback*
I'm sitting on the stage looking around and taking the arena in. I can't believe we're playing at Madison Square Garden in New York. The venue was huge I couldn't believe it. I'm in awe when Lena comes over.

She's in such a good mood, I love it when she's happy. She's almost always happy.

"What's up Hun" she says while playing with my hair. I love when she does that.

"Nothing, just taking in the venue. I can't believe we've come this far" I say.

"Well you know what you deserve it, you have a great voice and we're such a good team. You know I was in a bad mood, Jake is being an asshole. But I love you too much to be sad" she says to me. I still don't understand why she's with him. The only time she ever cries is because of him. I really hate him.

"Ugh when are you gonna be done with him Jesus Lena, he doesn't deserve you" I say for it seems like the hundredth time.

"I know, I know. I can't let him go, he means to much to me now. Be careful Vern one day you'll you meet someone whose gonna be the world to you. Don't become too dependent because soon you'll be addicted. He's my drug and even though he's killing me inside I can't stop using". I just look at her and sigh. I wish she would just let him go, he was such a dick. He cheated on her like four times, and calls her terrible names. In the beginning he was a perfect gentleman but then it all went downhill from there.

"Anyway enough about me, lets get a picture I wanna remember this moment" she says as she pulls out her Polaroid camera. We smile and she snaps it waiting for it to process. We sat there until sound check just talking and laughing.
*End of Flashback*

That was her last good day. Jake broke up with her the next morning. She was so sad she fell into depression and then starting doing drugs going from one addiction to the next. I tried to help her but I couldn't. I couldn't do anything.

My fingers crossed over the picture and I closed my eyes wanting to go back to that moment. But every time I think about her, my mind goes back to that sad dead girl that I found on the bathroom floor.

Tears rolled down my face as I looked through the rest of the book. I was about to close the book when I heard the voice. His voice. I didn't wanna look at him. I hated him.

"Hello darling, long time no see"

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Guys!! sorry it's been so long I'm lazy as hell lol. Anyway I'm gonna start updating as often as I can now that I have nothing to do honestly.

ALSO I GOT THE 1975 TICKETS THEY SOLD OUT IN LIKE 2 MINUTES BUT I GOT ONE BLESS.

Who do you think is trying to talk to Vern by the way? Comment what you think.

love you guys, vote and comment!!