Ashes in the Snow

Six

Daniel sighs, knowing the moment had been ruined. I'm not exactly mad that my mentor had ruined the moment, maybe a little embarrassed since this is only our second encounter. I do wonder what it would have been like to kiss Daniel though. Would I have developed feelings for him if we had kissed? At least the kind of feelings to do more than just kissing with him.

I used to date a boy from District 12, his name is Eric. He's a little taller than Daniel; I believe Eric is the tallest person in District 12. He is built similar to Daniel where he was tall and muscular. He had blonde hair which had a conservative style with a side part. He also had icy blue eyes, which is how I would imagine beautiful parts of the ocean would look like. He made it through the reaping without being picked. He's now 20 years old and mines for coal. Him and his family don't do very well financially, like most of us. Even though he's someone who should eat more due to his size, he doesn't, giving what he can to his family. He's the most resilient person I know. We started dating when I was 14, and we ended things about a year ago. He wasn't someone I saw long term, like Daniel could be. He was just someone I fell for quick and hard and I should've known better. He caught every girl's eye in town and I was stupid to believe he would only be faithful to me. I think a part of me always knew it wouldn't last long. Like I said before, I guess I had always suspected I would end up with Daniel.

"Can I talk to you alone?" Coriolanus asked.

"Sure." I look at Daniel, and he understood what I was asking. He nods his head and sulks upstairs.

He nods towards the couch, "sit."

I sit on the couch and he sits on the chair across from me. He scans me up and down, probably acknowledging that I won't win due to my malnutrition. I'm not all skin and bones like you're probably imagining. However, I'm probably a little underweight for my size.

"So...you and your male friend?" He smirks.

"He has a name, you know," I roll my eyes.

"Yeah, Daniel is it?" He sighs in a joking manner.

"Yes," I pause. "And Daniel and I aren't really a thing. I don't really know what we are."

"That's too bad."

"Why's that?" I ask, confused.

"You could have used a romance story to get your sponsors," he says bluntly.

I don't know why, but I didn't like his response. It's not that I wanted him to care about me in that kind of way. But I guess I just wanted him to care, something genuine. I just feel like a strategy for whatever he gets out of it.

"Why do you care if I win?" I ask bluntly.

"Honestly, there's money that I win if you win. My family really needs it."

"Sorry for your loss," I scoff in disbelief. Everyone in the Capitol has money, how could he not? But also, I think there's truth behind what he says.

"No, you're going to win this," he says determined.

My eyes immediately shot up at him, piercing into his. I feel a rush of anger and a bit of sadness.

"No, no I'm not!" I yell, filled with fury. "You wanna know why? It's because I didn't come from district 1 or 2, I come from the poorest district and I am malnourished and don't know how to fight!" I feel the tears start to pool under my eyes. "I never asked for any of this. It was me or her. It was me or her. It was me or her!"

I look away, wiping some tears that ran down my cheeks. I look back up and see his eyes filled with sorrow. His demeanor completely changed. He stands up and sits on the couch next to me. I turn towards him and he grabs both of my hands. "I'm sorry for what you're going through, I can't imagine what you must be feeling. I'm sorry for telling you about the money, I was just trying to be honest. The first thing I should've told you is how brave you were for volunteering. Very few volunteer for this, especially an outlier district like yours. I was amazed by how selfless you were, which is something I'm definitely not."

"I don't want to die," I cry out, taking my hands back to wipe my tears.

"I won't let that happen."