Witchcraft SMP react to Lord Sausage of House Sausage of Mythland

Music disc war

Joey: Hey, is the music disc war coming up after this? I really liked hearing about that one!

Everyone: Music disc war?

Jana: Yes, Joey, it's coming up. Anyway, Jimmy's this person on the server, he's the ruler of the cod empire, and everyone really likes to mess with him.

Sausage: It's a generally accepted rule that Jimmy is very fun to mess with.

Scott: Yeah, all my other lives know Jimmy and they all agree that a day's wasted if they haven't bullied Jimmy at least once.

Shelby: Poor Jimmy.

Tiff: Why is he so much fun to mess with?

Joey: He makes too much of a fuss about everything to stop.

Pris: What's this about a cod empire, though?

Sausage: He's part codfish, I think, I never asked.

Eloise: That just sounds like something you should ask about, honestly.

Jana: Well anyway, Jimmy declared that he had a music disc that was the best song in the world, and well, Sausage decided to-

Sausage: He'd stolen a bunch of stuff from me first and denied everything when I showed him the receipts for it so I stole his terrible music disc!

Scott: Did you just confess to a crime?

Sausage: It is never a crime to mess with Jimmy!

Tiff: Yeah, I'm not so sure about that.

Joey: Come on, Tiff, if you met Jimmy you'd be teasing him too. (Tiff looked at him weird.)

Cleo: Should we be worried about Sausage's retaliation? Or Jimmy's?

Sausage: I wasn't retaliating! When I stole his music disc I was just ransoming it for a diamond block so that Jimmy would pay for the stuff he took!

Mertha: What did he take anyway?

Sausage(Listing on his fingers.): Eggs, wheat, seeds, a bell, and a cow. And uh, I think I forgot something... oh yeah, a fortune III book.

Lauren: Was Jimmy trying to bake a cake or something?

Sausage: I don't know, but I honestly don't want to eat any more cake in my life.

Everyone: What?!

Bertha: What's wrong with cake?

Sausage: Eat it too much and it gets kind of bleargh!

Pris: Okay, how many did you eat?

Jana: If he continues that's a spoiler. Anyway, Sausage practiced some battle strategies by letting loose some pillagers onto Pixandria-

Cleo: And I'm guessing that's Pixlriff's place.

Sausage: Yeah, real lazy and egotistical name, am I right? Not like Mythland, hah!

Everyone: Um...

Jana: Yeah, don't tell him. Anyway, even though it was just a prank at first without any malice intended Pix ended up siding with Jimmy in the music disc war.

Joey: Can we get on with it? More killing please!

Shelby: Joey! I thought we left behind your bloodlust a thousand years ago!

Tiff: Bloodlust?

Lauren: Should I be worried he might betray and kill me again? But then again I don't have any blood...

Joey: Um, no, Lauren, I'm not going to betray you again, I just really like war.

Lauren: Okay, I feel a little better now...