Ramirah Shiloh Capri
When I opened my eyes, I felt heat rush to my cheeks. Solana had her arms wrapped around my waist, her head nestled in the crook of my neck. I swore we were just supposed to be friends, and here I was—completely out of my panties. Weak in the knees, smh.
Sliding out of bed quietly, I headed to the bathroom to start my morning routine. As I turned on the shower, Solana waltzed in, brushing her teeth like nothing happened.
"Morning, mama," she mumbled, her voice raspy, sending a shiver down my spine.
"Good morning, Solana." I kept my focus on gathering my clothes, trying not to give her the satisfaction of knowing I was blushing like a fool. She kissed my forehead, her smirk too obvious.
"You sleep good?" Her smirk deepened, and I couldn't help but just nod. Even though we didn't go all the way, what happened last night still had me feeling some type of way.
"I'm finna shower, get out!" I pushed her toward the door, ignoring her chuckle. Of course, she had to throw out, "Girl, I had every inch of your body in my mouth last night," just to get under my skin. I rolled my eyes and stepped into the shower, pretending like she didn't have me weak in the knees all over again.
♡
After our start to the morning, we found ourselves walking around the outlet mall. Solana was grabbing a few things, but I couldn't stop replaying those moments from last night.
"What you think about this hat?" she asked, holding up a dark green and orange fitted hat. I nodded, distracted. "It's cute. You got the 1s to match that, right?" She did, of course, and grabbed two more hats before heading to the register.
I was scrolling through my phone when she showed me one of the hats. It had Ramirah embroidered on it with a little heart.
"Solana, why'd you put my name on YOUR hat?" I asked, blushing despite my curiosity.
"Because I'm delusional," she shrugged like it was the most normal thing in the world.
"How are YOU delusional?"
"Because I'm lowkey chasing your ass." She said it so casually, but the energy shifted immediately. Guilt started creeping in, but I didn't know what to say. I mean, I was feeling her—but I was also trying to focus on me and school.
We walked in silence for a while until we hit the Lululemon store. I was excited at first, grabbing a few jackets and yoga pants like the basic Lululemon girly I am. The total hit somewhere around $400, and before I could react, Solana swiped her card and paid without saying a word.
"Thank you," I mumbled, feeling the awkward tension growing. I hated this feeling.
Later, we sat in the food court. I had a smoothie and pretzel, Solana with her smoothie, still glued to her phone. The silence was driving me crazy.
"Solana," I called softly.
"What, Ramirah?" she responded, not even glancing up. What happened to 'mama'?
"You okay?" I asked, my stomach twisting when she just nodded, still not looking up from her phone.
This was bad. The vibe was all wrong now, and I had no clue how to fix it. She asked if I was ready to go, and I nodded, the pit in my stomach growing. When we got in the car, the silence was so thick and not a comfortable silence.
"I think we should quit hanging out for a while," Solana finally said, catching me completely off guard. What? After all the flowers, the hat with my name on it, and... last night? It stung, but I couldn't say she was wrong. I hadn't been matching her energy. Still, it hurt.
"Okay," I whispered, staring out the window the rest of the drive. She dropped me off at my place, no hug, no kiss. Just, "Bye, Ramirah," and she was gone.
♡
I threw myself on my bed, burying my face in the pillows to scream.
Incoming FaceTime: Nina 💗
"Hey, look who finally made it home!" Nina teased, and I groaned.
"Yeah, Solana just dropped me off," I muttered.
"Why do you sound like someone just ran over your puppy?" Nina pressed, making me roll my eyes.
"Solana said we should stop hanging out for a while," I admitted, pouting like a child.
"What?! Why?"
I told her everything, from the flowers to the hat, to how I'd been distant lately.
"Well, Mirah, it sounds like she's been putting in all this effort, and you've been giving her nothing," Nina said, matter-of-factly, making me groan again.
"You don't think I know that? Ugh, I just don't know how to balance everything," I said, frustrated with myself.
"Look, don't get mad at me cause someone's breaking their back to be with you, and you're too scared to open up," she fired back.
"Ain't nobody scared!" I protested, trying to convince myself more than her. "Whatever, I'm going to bed."
"Girl, it's 6:30. You finna go daydream about Nova. Or should I say Solana?" Nina teased, laughing.
"Girl, fuck you," I hung up, tossing my phone onto the bed.
I sighed, clicking onto Instagram out of habit, and there she was. The first story on my feed: Solana, looking fine as hell, making my heart drop.
How dare she look that good? All I could think about was her face between my legs, and—ugh, never mind. I had school tomorrow. Time to cry myself to sleep.
