paper rings (l.h.)

28

We left the party quietly, Calum finding us a way out to avoid flashing lights and creeps nearly pushing us on our asses. I watched as Luke smiled as if he was doing something wrong, watching as the crowded street full of loitering paps waited anxiously for their next picture of Luke and his bandmates. "We did it," he celebrates under his breath, the warm glow of the streetlights that fly by offering me the slightest peek at such a beautiful smile.

We sat listening to Luke's music, which was turned down so quietly I could barely make out who it was, or what they were saying. This was how it usually was, the silence was never awkward or unwanted. It was nice being quiet with him.

"You know," he looks over at me as we begin down perhaps the longest and darkest stretch of road I've seen. I play with the hem of my dress just above my knees, my head resting back on the seat. "I've been with you for a while now and I don't even know what music you like."

"Music?" I repeat, smiling as I watch him pass his phone to me. I felt pressured somehow, as if somehow my taste was too embarrassing to be spoken out loud. "I like your music."

He chuckles, running his hand down the steering wheel, the other reaching over to hold mine. "Other than mine."

I look down at his hand, at the scar on his knuckle and the ring on his index finger. "I like Taylor Swift a lot."

"Huh," he scoffs.

"What?" I sit up straight, my voice cracking a bit despite my best attempt to not.

"Nothing!" He replies, turning to watch me tense up as if he was about to berate me to shreds. "I'm just surprised, that's all."

I sit back slowly, raising my chin with a slow "about?"

He grabs my hand and kisses my knuckle as if to calm me down. I watch as he does this, the long stretch of highway doesn't look like it'll ever end.

He doesn't give me an answer I want. Instead, he asks: "Come back to LA with me."

"LA?" I sit up straight.

"I mean, not forever," he chimes back in. "For a week or so. I have to pick up a few things, and sort things out."

"When?"

"Next month sometime," he shrugs. "Missy will just have to get over it."

"I'd have to... she'd need someone here," I say softly, frowning as I turn to look back out the window. It wasn't that I didn't want to go with him. The reason I live there rent free is because I am my Grandmother's caretaker in exchange. "I'll have to find someone to come down for however long."

"I hope you do," he turns back to the road, watching as the lines twist and turn with the curve of the rural backroads he had grown up on. I felt his eyes on me as the music faded from Nirvana to Taylor Swift. I hear a song I couldn't quite recognize at first, until his hand moved to the volume to turn it up louder, and the windows all the way down.

"I like shiny things, but I'd marry you with paper rings," Luke sang as loud as he could, louder than me. I felt my hair whip around every which way, and suddenly I wasn't so tired anymore. I could have spent forever like this, driving down dirt roads like the country kid he was, and the one I turned out to be. I watched the dust from the road shoot up in the air behind us, wondering what I did to deserve this, and how the world didn't actually end when I watched my Dad on the other side of a podium while I sat beside a judge.

"Are you tired?" I grab his arm after he shuts my door for me, looking up at his side profile as we begin the long trek to the porch.

"A little," he shrugs. "Not as tired as you, though."

Once we reach the top step, I lift up the skirt of my dress to reveal my undergarments, and the joint that was strapped to my hip since the party. "Share this with me?" I ask, my hand sliding down his forearm to pull him as I take a step or two backwards to the swing my Grandpa had attached to the wooden roof.

I sit down first, Luke smirking down at me as he reaches in his pocket. "I forgot this in my pocket anyway," pulling out a red Bic lighter.

I place the joint between my lips as I lean towards him, his quiet laugh interrupting the silence of the early morning we found ourselves in. He clicks it a few times, until the orange flame appeared. He holds it to the tip, until it glows red hot. I breathe it in slowly, ignoring the cough that tries to force itself out of my chest.

"What have I gotten you into?" He jokes, as I pass it to him while nearly choking on the smoke. He rubs my back as he himself takes a few drags.

I turn to him smiling, my voice raspy as I sit back on the swing. "California sober, right?"

The joint makes its way over to me, he sits back just as I did, wrapping his arm around my shoulders.

"I really am in love with you," I say after my third, fourth turn. "I have been for a while."

He kisses the back of my head, which probably smells like Calum's cigarettes and weed. "I have been, too. But I'm sure you knew from the get-go."

I turn to glance up at him. "But what'll happen when you have to go back?"

"I'm not opposed to moving into my own place here, I've got family nearby anyway. My Mom isn't terrible all the time," he shrugs, justifying it in his mind, despite him hating the whole town.

"You don't like this place," I roll my eyes.

"It isn't that bad, it's where I found you. Home is only as good as the people there. This is my home now."

"One day," I say under my breath. "You can take me wherever you want. And we won't be confined to just this small town."

"But for now, this is perfect," he sighs, kissing the back of my head once again before smashing the joint on the ground, and slipping it in his pocket to throw away inside.