paper rings (l.h.)

10

I sat on the porch as I did every night, as if things weren't the way they were. But this time the TV wasn't blaring upstairs, my shirt wasn't wet from cleaning the dishes, and my stomach was gurgling from not eating all day. It was quiet, my phone sat screen-side up waiting for a call from my Mother that never arrives. Instead, text messages like:

Still sleeping. Uncle Tim is pissing me off. Lol.

How are you? I'm worried about you, too.

Aunt Nina is grabbing the Doctor. She's been sleeping all day and we are getting worried.

They said it was normal. Her eyelashes began to flutter. But nothing more than that.

Suddenly, I glance up to a message from a name I hadn't seen this evening yet.

Luke: How are you holding up?

I watch my hands as they take my phone, allowing it to rest on top of the book I had been occupied with instead of sleeping. I respond a little faster than I meant:

I'm alright. Still at home. Grandma is still sleeping.

I place the bookmark between the pages, the simple shorts and a white band shirt that I had stolen from my Uncle's items up in the attic. The white looked pretty on my tan skin, sun kissed melanin my Dad's side of the family tree had granted me. I'd like to think that my tan complexion, my almond, golden brown eyes and dark hair are the only things I inherited from my Dad.

My courage to keep going, my love for the Earth and all the things it's given me I'd like to think I got from my Mom. I admired how she believed me when I told her, how she didn't hesitate to turn him in no matter how much she loved him made me realize how strong she was. And how, even after all this time, she still worries about me. I didn't have anyone else until now, and if I lost Luke tomorrow then at least I still had my Mom.

But still, I stared down at my message as he typed his. I wanted company tonight, I wanted to thank Luke for what he had done for me, and how he has been nothing but kind although the two of us being practically strangers who happened to be on a first date when hell broke loose. He was a kind stranger who I was beginning to fancy. I suddenly sent this before I had the chance to think twice:

I'm ordering pizza. You should come over.

I should have known Luke made me wait to order for a reason. I sat on the porch as I did before I invited him over (after changing into something not stained, and brushing my teeth and hair for the first time in hours) my back pressed against the wooden post as his shiny car pulled into the driveway. He looked refreshed after a day of rest, I was surprised he agreed in the first place.

"Luke," I call his name, raising my eyebrow as he walks up the stairway to where I stand. "You didn't have to do that."

"I don't mind," he looks down at me, smiling warmly as I take it out of his hands. "How are you?"

"I'm good, she's good," I let out the first sigh of relief since I left. "She's going to be alright."

He smiles warmly, and genuinely. "That's good to hear, Mary."

"I appreciate you," I look up at him. His hair is still wet, as if he just showered. But he smells of sweet cologne, and he wore the same Nirvana shirt that he had on the first time I met him. "I think I would have pulled all of my hair out of you weren't there," I can't help but laugh, although I truly believed it.