Regret Flows (Frerard)

Sober Motel

The rain slowed to a gentle drizzle that was better seen than heard. Frank slumped over onto the kitchen counter, resting his forehead against the cool marble countertop. His anxiety had subsided since getting Gerard home and was replaced with a content warmth that began to rebuild his hollow core. The first day back, Gerard slept for fourteen hours straight after Frank stripped off his sodden clothes and bundled him in sweats and the mountain of blankets on their bed. The following day, Frank offered Gerard anything he wanted or needed as he was bed bound, but the elder only requested to be joined in bed and cuddled.

Now today, three days since Frank had found Gerard on their bench in the park, he was deep in the trenches of withdrawal. Frank continuously ran up and down the stairs to refill Gerard's water glass, even though he wasn't able to keep any of it down. He barely sat for ten minutes between refreshing the cool washcloth for his forehead and rinsing out the bucket of puke that was otherwise clamped in the elder's grip. Gerard cried into Frank's shoulder, repeatedly asking why he wasn't leaving him. The twenty three year old eventually stopped answering and instead only only replied, "I love you," and a soft kiss to his feverish forehead.

Gerard cried himself to sleep, leaving his head resting against Frank's shoulder. He pulled out his phone to a text from Ray, 'He still doin okay?'

'Withdrawal  / puking everywhere - exorcist style / seems to be easing up though'

'Good, Ill be there this evening' Ray replied quickly.

'Its okay, another day may be better'

'Nope / Sorry, kid / Be there in about two hours'

Frank sighed, putting his phone down on the mattress. Gerard shuffled slightly, adjusting to rest his head in Frank's lap. A genuine smile formed on his lips for the first time in days as he looked down, gently stroking his finance's greasy black hair with his hand. While worried about Gerard getting sober again, he was overwhelmed with love, hope and understanding, knowing he would be with this man forever, regardless of their issues. He thought back to when Gerard had taken Frank home from the bar that night he was evicted and a new wave of guilt washed over him as he now knew how it was to be on the other side. He brushed the elder's cheek with his thumb, appreciating the warm pink blush that had returned to his otherwise ghostly skin.

The younger sat watching Gerard sleep, occasionally overthrown by the urge to lean over and gently kiss his hair. The serene comfort of their life slowly bubbled back through Frank's lungs, sweeping him off to sleep until a loud sharp banging came from the door. "Ungh- what the fuck?" Gerard muttered from Frank's lap as his head was gently shifted to the pillow allowing Frank to stand.

"Oh fuck," Frank whispered as he ran down the stairs, leaving Gerard confused.

"Where is he?!" Ray screamed as he pushed through the door the second Frank unlocked it.

"Ray- it okay, he's hom-" Frank tried to calm him down to no avail.

"GERARD ARTHUR WAY!" Ray's voice boomed as he stomped towards the stairs with Frank following closely. He slammed through the bedroom door causing Gerard to jolt and moan in pain as his head ached. "What the FUCK is wrong with you, you goddamned piece of shit?" Ray continued to shout as Frank recoiled, anxiously chewing his lip. "You fucking asshole, you threw away, what- it been like two, almost three years of sobriety?! Why would you do that to youself? Better yet, why would you do that to Frank?" Gerard laid stone faced until the mention of Frank caused him to sink into the mattress with guilt. "He was worried fuckin' SICK about you, and you were just? Where? Out making yourself feel even shittier?" He paused to catch his breath, and adjust his tone. "I went into your studio, Gerard." He said disappointed, looking up from the ground so Gerard could see the pain in his eyes, "What the fuck, man?"