Keep Dreaming

Chapter 13

"Tess?" Leah says
"Yeah" I say quietly. I couldn't tell her about last night could I?
"What's up?" She asks

Flashback
Everyone went home from spending the Christmas and yesterday was Boxing Day. I was out with Beth and Viv. We bought some things and Beth says "you know Leah's been engaged before?"
"What" I say
"Yeah her and Jordan thought things were serious" Viv says
"Did she not say anything? Usually she tells people she meets" Beth says
"No" I say. Me being me lost it.
I drove all the way to Birmingham to see Jordan, I knocked on the door and she says "did you and Leah broke up?"
"No, I need to ask you a question Jordan?" I say
"Okay" she says
"Were you and Leah engaged?" I ask
"Yeah, but we shouldn't have been" Jordan says
"Why did you break up" I ask
"She wanted everything, she wanted kids, marriage, she wanted a family. But I didn't, I didn't want those things" Jordan says
"I don't want to be married, I prefer not to. I don't want that sense of commitment" I say
"She will understand talk to her" she says
"Thanks jord" I say
Me and Jordan were still friends we have known each other for years, and even though I'm now dating her ex it didn't seem to matter.
I leave and see Leah. I go inside and put my keys in the bowl. I was terrified of what she was going to say. Si I bottle up my feelings and decide to go to bed instead.

Flashback ends

"You haven't gotten up yet? It's 11" Leah says
"I'm tired" I whisper
She cuddles into me, my head rests on her chest and I fall back to sleep.
After a while I wake up. Fern was in the room talking to Leah. "Is she okay?" I hear
"I don't know. She came in last night and came straight to bed and hasn't moved since" Leah says. I could hear her heart beat, she was so pure and innocent. I couldn't hurt her.
"Maybe ask Beth and Viv, they were with her yesterday" Fern says.
"Yeah, maybe" Leah says. After a while I start to move and open my eyes.
"It's now 1pm" Leah says kissing my head.
Fern was not in the room anymore, "talk to me" Leah says
"I don't know" I say
"Why?" She asks
"I just don't" I say
"You don't?" Leah asks
I break into tears and she pulls me in tighter.
"If I say you will hate me" I say shakily
"I could never hate you" Leah says wiping my tears. I sit up and she looks at me grabbing my hand. "Because one day I'll put a ring on this finger" she says
Shit
What do I do now? "I- I" I say
"I think we should break up" I say immediately regretting what I said.
"What?" She says shocked, "I just need space to think, everything's so stressful right now. And I just, need space" I say
"Me and Fern can go to Beth's or something" I say and leave the room.

"Fern, pack some stuff up" I say
"What why?" She asks
"We are going to stay at Beth's for a while" I say, tears falling down my face.
I quickly message Beth to ask if it's okay and she says it is.

On the way to Beth's Fern asks "what's happened?"
"It's- it doesn't matter" I say through tears
We get to Beth's and she immediately pulls me into a hug.
Me and Fern go inside and get shown our rooms. I get one of Leah's hoodies and get into the bed crying.
Beth comes in "what happened?" She asks placing herself next to me hugging me.,
"Yesterday you told me about her wanting to be married" I start to say
"And how, she got engaged to Jordan" I say. "I went to Jordan's" I say
"Did you kiss her?" She asks
"No, never" I say
"She was telling me about everything Leah wants" I say crying
"I don't want marriage. And I was trying to tell Leah. I said that she will hate me, and she said she will never hate me because one day she will put a ring in my finger. Then I ended it, there was no way out" I say crying even harder.
Beth pulls me in tighter, "you know we've got training tomorrow" Beth says
"Great" I say
After a while Beth leaves and I cry myself to sleep. I wake up at around 2 in the morning unable to sleep.
I sit up and break into tears.
I call my dad. "Darling what's happened? You do know it's 2 in the morning" he says
"Me and Leah broke up" I say crying down the phone
"Aww sweetie I'm so sorry, what happened?" He asks
"She wants things I don't. I couldn't tell her dad, I couldn't hurt her" I say crying more
"Where are you now?" He asks
"Beth's" I say