DERPY KIND! Gravity Falls Guide

Mabel's Guide to Color

Short opens with Mabel laughing.

Mabel: Ha ha ha, aha ha ha ha, aha ha ha ha ha. And that's Mabel's Guide to laughing for an uncomfortable amount of time. (Pause) Uh-oh, here comes more! Aha ha ha ha ha!

Dipper hides his head in a book in the background as he puts headphones on your ears even if you were already sleeping upside down.

Intro: A techno mixed version of Mabel's voice calling herself plays while a montage featuring Mabel is played.

Mabel: Today: Mabel's Guide to Color!

Cuts to Mabel with a projector.

Mabel: Ah, color. It's all around us! (Turns to a picture of Dipper) From the green of a nauseous twin brother, (Turns to a picture of Grunkle Stan) to the weird orange of an old man's nose, (Turns to a picture of a toilet next to Soos) to the beautiful sky blue of toilet water.  And yellow! (Shows a picture of you and your glowing yellow eyes)

Soos: (points towards projector) I'm in that one!

You: Me too!

Mabel: Yes you are, guys. (To the camera) But it wasn't always this way. (Turns to a black and white picture) According to history, the world was black and white until color was invented (A wizard Mabel drew appears in the picture) by a magic wizard named "Crayondalf the Fabulous!" What's your favorite color, Gravity Falls?

Cuts to a montage asking the people of Gravity Falls what their favorite color is.

Pacifica: Hot pink.

Grenda: Beige!

Dipper: Y/N. Wait, what was the question again?

Camera shows you blushing while looking down.

Soos: Lasers. Ooh! Or liquid metal! Does leopards count as a color?

Wendy: Flannel.

Soos: Okay, okay. I've narrowed it down to Aurora Borealis, camouflage...

Candy: Magic vision poster!
Gompers: (Captioned): Burgundy.

Stan: None.
Mabel: What?

Stan: I don't have a favorite color. I don't even like colors.

You: that can't be true...

Mabel: Not even rainbows?

Stan: Beats me. I've never seen a rainbow.
Mabel & you: WHAT?!?

You: you poor, poor, poOOR soul....

Cuts to Mabel with horns, a siren, and a sign written "COLOR EMERGENCY." Then cuts to Mabel with you, Dipper, Candy, Grenda and Waddles.

Mabel: Alright guys, how can we get Grunkle Stan to see a rainbow? I need ideas, people!

Waddles: (Walks away)

Grenda: Sometimes if I drink expired milk, I see rainbows! I'm gonna try right now!

She takes out a gallon of expired milk and starts to drink it

You: yuck..

Candy: (Takes out a paper, starts drawing on it and shows it to the camera) What if we reflect the rainbow from the falls into Stan's window?

You: awesome!

Dipper, you, & Candy: Yeah! (High fives)

Grenda: Yeah! (Falls off the bed and starts to sleep)

You: Uuh-

Candy: It's fine. She does this.

You: okay.

Static.

Mabel: Alright, we're about to unleash the power of the "Roy-G-Biv-A-Tron" into Stan's office!

Cuts to Dipper and Candy at the end of the waterfall. They reflect the rainbow with a mirror. Cuts back to Stan.

Stan: Nothing brightens the dark room like a light from a window! Time to open the window... (Stan opens the window and the rainbow beams right into his eyes) OH NO!! WHY!!! WHY IS THIS HAPPENING!!

Mabel: Ta-daah! Surprise!
You: Happy rainbow day!

Stan: MY EYES ARE ON FIRE! AAAAAAHH! AAAAAAAHH! AAAAAAHHH! (Stan falls down)

Mabel: Maybe we over did it a little bit.
You: you think...(crosses arms)

Stan AAAAAAHH! AAAAAAAHH! OH ITS SO HOT IT HURTS! AAAAAAHH!
Stan's desk starts to burn.

Static. Cuts to Stan getting his eyes bandaged by Soos and Dipper in the background while Mabel and you are in front of the camera.

Stan: Get those bandages good and tight! I'm not giving my life savings to some quack doctor.

Mabel: That's it for today! Join us next week when we'll be doing "Mabel's Guide to Apologizing to your Great Uncle."

Stan: I hate color more than ever!

Mabel: He's just saying that. (Whispering) Cut! Cut it!

You run to the camera and hit it with your fist.

Static.