Jump From the Air (Erudite Series #5)

Kapitulo 9

The next day, I went to a pet grooming place to get Maki cleaned up. I shrugged off last night even if I felt like staying in my bed and bawling out my eyes. I did that only when Mommy first drank. I realized even after I did that, and Mommy noticed, nothing changed between us. She still kept herself in the house. I still had to do practically everything in the house. I knew crying or showing vulnerability to her wouldn't do any good after that.

My heart broke a little that day.

It sounded depressing.

How can your own mother not change despite seeing her kid heartbroken?

Daddy, on the other hand, always asked for patience and understanding from me. I just smiled at him every time. We both knew Mommy was difficult to handle, especially during the first few months after her legs stopped working. I cried multiple times to Daddy. He tried his best to, at least, give me anything I asked since he wasn't with me physically. Daddy was a good man. But I wish he was beside me whenever I felt like Mommy didn't value me or whatever I did for her. Whenever I felt like I was living with a dead body. It was hard.

Facing puberty alone and unguided makes you grow quicker.

I wasn't sure if that was a good thing. I wasn't sure if that was a bad thing either.

Until now, it's tough. But living with Mommy every day, I thought, made me numb to the pain.

But last night she proved me otherwise.

Sa bagay, paano ba naman ako tuluyang mawawalan pakiramdam kung araw-araw kong pinagsisilbihan ang taong nanakit sa akin? Imposible. Palaging nariyan 'yong sakit, 'yong pagod, at 'yong pagtatanong.

Kailan ba siya mabubuhay ulit? Kailan ba ako makakatakas sa situwasiyon na 'to? Mangyayari ba 'yon? Darating ba ang panahong papasukin niya ulit ang ibang tao sa buhay niya?

Binaling ko na muna ang isipan ko sa ginagawa ko ngayon bago pa ako mabaon sa mga tanong ko. Ngayon ay bumibili ako sa isang grocery store malapit sa amin.

I glanced at the list Mommy gave me. Halos lahat ay nakuha ko na, kulang na lang ay ang mga laundry detergent at fabric softener. Kaya naman pumunta ako sa aisle ng mga iyon at pumili ng bibilhin. Sabi ni Mommy 'yong pinakamalaking size ang bibilhin ko sa detergent, pero ubos na. Kaya, iyong sumunod na lang ang kinuha ko. Then, naglagay na rin ako ng softener sa cart ko.

I paid for everything and walked home. It was a humid and bright day, so I wished I could hold out my umbrella. My hands were busy with the grocery bags, though. I felt the stream of sweat on my back and neck.

"Magsaing ka muna ng kanin bago mo sunduin si Maki," utos ni Mommy sa akin pag-uwi.

"Opo," sagot ko bago maghugas ng kamay pagkatapos ayusin ang ilang pinamili ko. Mommy fixed the other things like the food.

Nagtakal ako ng bigas at hinugasan 'yon. I then plugged the rice cooker and placed the clean rice there to cook. Umalis na rin ako at sinabihan si Mommy na kumain na siya kung sakaling magtagal ako kay Maki.

I fixed my tied hair before going out and shielding myself from the sun using my umbrella. Nakarating ako kay Maki ng saglit lang na paglalakad.

"Hi, ma'am, ready na po siya," saad ng empleyado ng pet grooming place sa akin. "How much?"

"Bali 2000 po lahat," sabi niya. I took out two bills from my wallet and handed it to her.

Another employee went to the waiting area holding the leash of Maki. Kinuha ko ang leash at nagpasalamat. I squatted to look at Maki's shorter and softer hair.

"Ang pogi naman," bulong ko kay Maki habang kinakarinyo ang kaniyang ulo at likod.

I took out my phone and shot a photo of Maki to post on my Instagram later.