Time after time

I wanna grow old with you

Elle POV

I felt completely stunned sitting in Noah's jeep on the way home from today's catastrophic lunch. I expected that the situation with Lee and Linda wouldn't be easy, but I never thought I'd experience this: being pushed out of Lee's and my dad's lives. I felt like my life was slipping through my fingers. I was so lost in my thoughts that I was surprised when Noah asked me:

- I'm going to stop at the drive-thru order to grab us a lunch. Do you have a particular desire?

- I'm not particularly hungry, Noah! I think Lee and Linda just took away my appetite!

- Elle, you need to eat! You didn't have breakfast this morning since we got up late.

- I know, I just don't want anything!

- Do you trust me then?

Noah finally ordered for me at a dinner I didn't know about and I was too much consumed in my thoughts to even guess what he had ordered for me. Afterward, we landed at the parking lot at the bottom of the hill with the letters Hollywood. I didn't feel particularly in the frame of mind to go up there since that's where my life started to go off the rails 3 days ago. But Noah convinced me to go by telling me that it would allow me to exorcise some of the ghosts.

We walked hand in hand to the top of the hill. Noah spread out a blanket at the letter L just like the first time he brought me here. We sat side by side and eventually the smell emanating from the bag helped me regain my appetite. Noah had got me right by ordering me a chicken burger with bacon and a strawberry milkshake. We ate in silence but as soon as we finished and Noah put all the papers in the bag, I felt the emotions wash over me. Tears welled up in my eyes and began to roll down my cheeks. Noah took me in his arms and I burst into tears pressed against his chest. I don't know how long I stayed like that.

- I'm sorry, Shelly! I didn't believe you this morning when you told me that you thought meeting Linda and Lee would be difficult. We could have made an excuse to avoid lunch.

- It would have happened the same, Noah!" I said, wiping away my tears. "Lee would have known at some point that we were back together. And my dad and Linda would have just asked me a little bit later to clear out my room. It's painful, but I have to accept that my life will change.

- It's a big part of becoming an adult. " Noah said as he also gently wiped my cheek with his thumb.

- How did you feel about it, Noah, becoming an adult? To accept that your life has changed?

Noah averted his gaze to look at the view of the city before telling me:

- During my last year of high school, I didn't think I would have a hard time leaving home to make a life for myself in college, but I found it very difficult.

- Why?" I asked, scrutinizing her face.

- Because of you! " He said, caressing my cheek. "I was never able to tell myself that Boston had become my home because for me, my life was still here with you! When I told you a few days ago that if you went to Boston it wasn't with me, I was in so much pain because in my deepest being, that's what I wanted and still want.

- Really!" I said, a little surprised. "Aren't you going to regret your free life as a university student last year by always having me close?

- No, I've spent the whole last year dreaming of you being there with me. All the things we could do together if we were both in Boston. Going out on the town or even in New York, studying together, meeting up for dinner. I want to have this life with you! So when you asked me if this was really what I wanted to break up with you and I said yes, deep down I was screaming no. I almost ran after you when you left!