Helping You...

Toshiro's Regret

⚠️WARNING ⚠️
-DARK THOUGHTS
-SELF-HATE

-YOUR POV-

"......"
You remained quiet when Ichigo asked that.
"Come on [Your Name.] Don't you want justice for the person that murdered you?"
Ichigo asked you again except in a different form.
"....."
You gave him a look saying 'leave it alone'
"Fine let me put it this way. What happens if he or she does it again?"
Ichigo said.
"Why...."
Is all you said.
"Well I know we haven't talked or hang out...I really wanted to...but..."
Ichigo stopped mid-sentence.
(What he meant to say your a loss cause...)
The inner demon spoke.
"Is it bad I'm a loss cause...."
You blurted out.
This caught Ichigo off guard.
"While I was suffering everyday.....you just decided oh let me talk to her and make friends with.
Then when I'm done I'll stab her on the back..."
You gave a deadly look.
It sent shivers down his spine.
"W-what no!"
Ichigo said.
"Where's Mizuma?"
You said and sat up.
"H-hey take it easy!"
He was about to reach out and lay you back down.
In a blink in a eye.
You slapped his hand away.
"I don't need your help....or want it....I rather die then trust another soul...."
Your eyes glowed a different colour.
{[Your Name] I'm beside you. Calm down.}
Mizuma spoke.
Immediately you looked to your right.
There she was.
"Mizuma...."
You sighed with relief.
"[Your Name].....I know you don't want me asking this....."
Ichigo caught your attention.
(I don't like this....)
"But...those cuts on your arms.....did you do those?"
Ichigo asked
(Shit....)
The room was being to spin.
You didn't know what to do.
"....."
You wanted to say something.
But no words came out.
"[Your Name?]"
Ichigo called.
"What is it to you? Are you just curious..."
You tried to avoid the question.
"N-no. I really am worried about you."
Ichigo said.

-TOSHIRO POV-

It had been almost a full day that [Your Name] ran away.
"Damn it...."
I said and placed my hand on my forehead.
"Captain. I just got the results about the blood..."
Rangiku snapped my thoughts away.
"Yes...go on."
I urge Rangiku to tell me.
"It's....[Your Name's] blood."
She said.
(What....)
I was shocked.
"They told me.....she must've been self- harming as they called it."
Rangiku added.
(Self.....harming.....)
I let that sink in for a bit.
"So....what your saying she.....hurts herself?"
Hoping that I'm wrong.
Rangiku nodded.
Immediately I felt.....sad.
But I didn't show it.
Because Rangiku would tease me about it.
And I wasn't in the mood for it.
"Any....reason why?"
I asked Rangiku.
"The research team and captain Unohana was their as well....
They told me it was severe depression.....apparently she had traumatic experience in her previous life...."
Rangiku explained.
(And I talked to her harshly....)
I covered my mouth.

-TOSHIRO'S FLASHBACK-

"An early bird. Good maybe your not useless after all."
"Why am I stuck with a troublesome person...."
"I should've stayed quiet! Then I wouldn't have to deal with you!"

-FLASHBACK ENDS-

(Gods....I'm such a jerk....)
I bet she was holding on to that pain.
I bet she really wanted to say something.
But...she just took it.
"Captain. I have just been informed. We are having another meeting....it's regarding [Your Name.]"
Rangiku said.
"Alright..."
I got up from my seat and made our way to the meeting hall.

-YOUR POV-

"Ichigo. It's time resume training. Let the girl rest."
Yoruichi came in the room.
(Thank you....)
You said in your mind.
"Fine..."
Ichigo said and got up from the floor.
As he was about to walk out.
"You know....it doesn't hurt to have people in your life."
As you were about to turn and glare at him.
You saw his face.
It showed sadness.
(Stop that...)
You just looked at the floor.
(I....deserve to be alone....I hate it when you force yourself in my life....)
You thought to yourself again.