Shiny pretty things

Chapter 10

When Tay was just a little boy, Mae would tell him how much of a good person he was. He didn't mind that his brother wanted his new toys. In fact, he let him have them. All of them.

As he grew older, his friends met new people. He didn't care that they would sometimes spend time together without him. He was happy for them. However, it unsettled his friends whenever he socialized with other people. It confused him to a certain degree why they would bother about such things. It further baffled him why they would like him to concern himself with such frivolous matters.

"Nobody wants to share their friends, Tawan," they explained.

"I guess I'm just not a selfish person," Tay replied.

"One day, you'll find something to be selfish about."

Tay brushed them off then. But he sees the truth in their remarks now for he has finally found something he wants to keep all to himself.

New's new lakorn has started filming. He stays away longer and spends less time when he visits. Tay takes what he can give and complains very little.

A new show means new co-stars and new friends. Tay is a reasonable person; he understands the importance of being close to one's co-stars. Chemistry and whatnot. However, there is a problem he cannot overlook.

New's current friends have no sense of personal space. Tay watches through his phone, jaws tightening, as they throw their arms around his beloved's shoulders. He seethes as they draw a laugh out of him. As they steal his gaze. New is beautiful and they all know it. They have their phones on him every minute and the actor basks in the attention.

All of these, Tay can stomach. He hates it but he could endure it. He is doing quite superbly at controlling the green-eyed monster within him, well until New started spending more time with his co-star, Joss Wayar.

Joss has an annoying face. Weirdly chiseled and not that handsome. Many would disagree with him. Tay cannot stand the actor. He has a weird name, he speaks weirdly and God, he cannot stop flaunting his muscles. Tay hates the way New lights up when the man opens his mouth. The way he giggles when Joss says anything.

In his suggested reels is a video he should in hindsight have not clicked on. It says JossNew moments. It is a video compilation of his New with this man he met not less than two months ago. Tay sees red. It bothers him that when New says he is busy, it is with this man. He only gets a few minutes of phone call from his boyfriend in a day and this Joss person gets to spend all the time with him.

He grips his phone too tight, it almost crushes. Kicks the bed frame repeatedly until his toes beg for some respite. He hates this. He fucking hates this feeling. It is consuming. It pulses through his body like a living thing. His heartbeat is volatile. His cords are wrung so tight he feels like he might snap in half any moment.

Tay struts to the bar. It is yet another Friday and New isn't with him. He is quite possibly with his co-star having another moment or whatever they call it. He throws the drinks back in quick succession until his pain numbs. He staggers towards his bedroom and barely lands on the bed before he passes out.

Tay awakes with a mind filled with fog and cotton in his mouth. A migraine is starting to form from the back of his head. He is reminded of why he avoids drinking too much. He finds the bathroom after stumbling too many times. Brushes his teeth and sheds off his clothes. The water is scalding on his back but it's cooler than the fire still licking his belly.

For how long he stayed under the hot sprays, he cannot tell. But on the upside, it sobers him up a little. He puts on clean clothes like the walking dead and goes to the kitchen.