Everyday it's a-gettin' closer - English Version

Being human - like a family

Nathanael noticed how Crowley was lying in her arms with almost no support of his own and his fingers had clawed into her sweater. His breathing had become noticeably heavier and his clammy body was trembling. His face was hidden in her torso.

"Are you in pain, my friend?" asked Nathanael softly and she felt Crowley's head nod into her shoulder. "Like my side's on fire..." he admitted honestly. "Okay, slow down..." Nathanael helped her best friend lie back down. Crowley took a deep breath and placed one hand on his injured flank. With his other hand, he sought Nathanael's and she immediately responded, placing it in hers. "Do you want me to call one of the doctors? Unfortunately, I can't do it..."At Nathanael's question, Crowley shook his head. "I could use that thing there...apparently it puts drugs into my bloodstream to relieve the pain..." he began to explain, pointing to the morphine pump lying on his lap, "...but...I'll be fine in a minute!" With a worried expression, Nathanael watched as Crowley narrowed his eyes and continued to inhale and exhale deeply through his nose."But...""...Little one...I'll be fine, really. At least that's how I feel!" Crowley interrupted Nathanael and she stumbled briefly before realizing what Crowley had meant. "Is it that bad to be anaesthetized? I mean like being under anesthesia after an operation?" "I don't know about other people, but...I heard you all. I wanted to answer too, but I couldn't. My body didn't obey me. I was like in a dark room from which I couldn't escape! An experience I honestly don't want to go through again" After Crowley's answer, Nathanael swallowed briefly. On the one hand, it hurt her heart to know that this had made such an impression on Crowley, but on the other, she was grateful to him for his honesty.

"I'm afraid I can't tell you what it's like for others either...when I was still human, there were no such healing methods. The greatest good was a few crushed herbs that you used...and you were lucky if it relieved the pain at least a little. But I know one thing," she then began, placing the pain pump in Crowley's hand, "there are two people in the cafeteria who would be heartbroken to see you suffer like this. And I honestly don't like it either. Besides, it's a different kind of pain relief than anesthesia, again, I know that thanks to my bookworm existence. It really only works against the pain - not against your perception... at least if you take it in a healthy measure." She could see the person she was talking to groan, but then followed her advice. However, the bad feeling Crowley had about it was clear to see. His eyes were dim, staring at the small device after he had used it. His tension eased physically, but mentally, there still seemed to be a barrier."There's more...isn't there? Something's bothering you..."Crowley's lips quivered at Nathanael's question. "I think...I'm just now realizing that this could have been the end...I don't know why right now...or why at all...but I'm scared shitless right now."He pressed his head deeper into the pillow and as he closed his eyes, a tear even trickled down his cheek, which Nathanael caught with his thumb before it pooled on the tube of the oxygen goggles. Gently, she took one of his trembling hands. "It would be wrong if I didn't... if you didn't care, you'd be getting an extreme enema from me right now!" she confirmed and then stroked his cheek with her fingers.

"Dearest?"Nathanael and Crowley looked to the door, which was open and Aziraphale, along with Muriel entered the room. Immediately, the former angel was on the free side of the bed and had taken his partner's free hand to cover his face. Crowley was about to wave it off, but the pressure around his hand from Nathanael stopped him immediately. A silent admonition."I can half-understand how you must have felt in heaven..." Crowley murmured hoarsely, unable to suppress a sob. Aziraphale immediately put both arms carefully around Crowley and let him bury his head in his shoulder. At this time, Muriel ran to Nathanael with a helpless face and she understood immediately. "Fear..." Nathanael formed with her mouth and Muriel began to realize. Her expression was now one of pity and, a little awkwardly, she stroked Crowley's shoulder. "We can usually go out for a bit... if you need some togetherness..." Nathanael suggested and she, as well as Muriel, looked at Crowley in surprise as he shook his head. Wordlessly, he took one of the hands of each of the two female angels, as well as one of Aziraphale's, and placed them on his chest before burying himself in Aziraphale again. Now while Aziraphale and Muriel were the confused ones, Nathanael sighed with a smile. "Didn't think you had such a sensitive streak in you," she still couldn't help but comment and the pallor on Crowley's face gave way to a plump blush. "Shut up," he grumbled into his non-existent beard."Mishpacha..." muttered Nathanael and then blinked a few times as she felt the looks of the others on her face. "Okay...it's also been a long time since I've reverted to my mother tongue," she giggled caught off guard and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. "Family..." Aziraphale translated and Crowley had come out of hiding again. "Sorry, when I get sensitive, I often let myself get carried away with rash remarks," Nathanael tried to justify himself. "Rash or not," Aziraphale had collected himself by now and the former angel smiled, "I like that statement." "It sounds nice," Muriel agreed, patting Nathanael on the shoulder with her free hand. Nevertheless, Nathanael looked shyly at Crowley, who slowly removed his hands from the braid he had created and wiped the tears from the corners of his eyes. "Family...", he repeated thoughtfully and then his lips formed into a smile, "...definitely sounds better than 'squad that wants to fight Metatron'." Nathanael immediately snorted and shook his head. "Really," Aziraphale admonished indignantly and rolled her eyes. "Much better," Nathanael whispered, winking one eye at Crowley. The former demon took one of her hands and gave it a quick squeeze. "Thank you... best friend," he replied softly and the two of them rested their foreheads together briefly. "Whatever you want to call it," Muriel interrupted the mood, "I definitely like being with you a lot more than being lonely and alone guarding the archive. Here... at least I'm someone.""You've always been someone, don't belittle yourself!" Nathanael admonished, puffing Muriel's shoulder with a clenched fist. "Amen to that," Crowley agreed and Aziraphale nodded in agreement. "What I meant to say," Muriel said, "...we can do this! Just like Nathanael always preaches to us! We'll take care of Crowley and when we're all fit again, we'll find a way so that we can live in peace and quiet on earth!""But we also have to prove our worth to God...remember, Armageddon is still planned again...""...I'm not worried about that," Crowley added to his loved one with a mischievous grin, "if there's one thing we're good at, it's spoiling the authorities' plans!"