Deep in my heart

Chapter 15: True Feelings

Jeremy began sweating bullets before until she just went for it and said"y'know I was wondering if you'll come and visit me when I leave here. The last 4 months with you have been wonderful and enlightening and you've helped me experience a wide range of emotions and experiences that I don't believe I've felt before. I wish I could stay here forever but I can't take up your time forever and I've got a life to live but I'm conflicted because no matter what I move on to after this, I want you to be there". Jeremy blushed and said"if you can't say it then I will...Elaenna Robinson I lo-". Before he could finish, Elaenna teared up and said"Don't say it just yet...I don't want you to be with me just yet".

Jeremy said"Why not? is it because of my job...I'm planning to leave with you and quit this place...it's time I moved on from the past and start living for myself and start healing. I want you around as well Elaenna, you are my strength, my reason for moving forward, and my hope that I can be strong once again. These past few months with you have been a lesson and a blessing for me and I'll do whatever it takes to be by your side for the rest of my life because that's what I want most".After hearing that, her heart began to race and that fuzzy feeling came back with a vengeance, her face began to heat up and it took her a minute or two in order to process that her feelings had been returned.

Finally, she said"I know how you feel but wait for me...the reason I don't want you to be with me now is because my full memory is almost back, and when it comes, I don't know what I'll become but I do know that I don't want to hurt you when it does hit". He smiles and says "I understand I will wait for you however long I have to Elaenna"She gives him a peck on the lips before heading inside for the night with him following behind her, feeling very relieved".

The next morning started off as usual with Jeremy and Elaenna eating, doing chores together, and then heading off to therapy sessions. When they got back, the two got cleaned up, changed clothes, and headed out to the van. They drove in silence all the way to the college campus until they pulled into the parking lot. Jeremy said"Are you ready?" and she nodded before the two got out of the vehicle in unison. Together they walked to the main hall and picked up her degree, her awards, and her trophies and took a picture in her gown they helped her change into and then left back out.

When they left the hall, Elaenna sighed and said"Jeremy, please wait in the car...this is something I need to do alone...my memories are flowing back and I don't want you to be caught in it. Jeremy nodded and fell back several feet but continued to keep her in his line of sight. As she walked around campus, some girls greeted her and expressed how happy they were that she was alive and OK while others gave her dirty looks and called her names. Nevertheless, she kept smiling and waving to the people as memories began to slap her violently.

She walked a bit longer before getting into the van and asking Jeremy to take her home. Jeremy did as she asked and took her back home and when they arrived, she asked not to be disturbed for the evening and walked back to her room alone while Jeremy returned the keys. All that evening, Jeremy felt something was off with Elaenna, and in truth there was. Her memories had fully returned now and with it came the pain, the anger the memories carried and it overwhelmed her. She was once again feeling disgusted with men but strangely enough, she was still feeling love for Jeremy. Her emotions were clashing and she needed to sort them out but not here. Later that night, when Jeremy was sleeping Elaenna got dressed, grabbed her phone, and slid out. She called a taxi and returned home to her aunt's house and told her she would explain in the morning.

The next morning, Jeremy woke up and rushed to check on Elaenna but what he found brought him to his knees. In a panic, he called Elaenna's aunt horrified until the phone clicked and she said"hello". Jeremy said"I'm so sorry Ms.Sheffield...Elaenna wandered out while I was sleeping last night...all she left was a note...do you think you could call her, she took her phone and it's ringing but she isn't answering my calls". Sasha said"No need, Elaenna is here in her room...she said her memories are back and she's a bit confused". Jeremy sighed and said"I understand" Sasha said, "listen, I held this from you all this time but Elaenna loves you and I'm fine with it, However, I'm not fine with her ignoring the truth and continuing to hide in her shell".

Sasha continued and said"I will be calling your superiors and telling them I want to switch to you living here due to her conditions so pack your bags. Listen I know this sounds wrong but only you and your feelings can break her out of this". Jeremy said"I dont understand how" Sasha said" She believes all men are evil except you...you accepted her and helped her and I know it meant a lot to her. Also, judging by the panic in your voice, I'm willing to bet you have feelings for her as well". Jeremy sighed and said"Yeah...I do and I made I promise I'd stick by her no matter what. I was even willing to quit and follow her where ever she wanted to go". Sasha said"Well pack your bags, it's time to follow her down this dark ass hole that is her feelings". Jeremy said"Yes ma'am", hung up and went to go pack...the love of his life needed him and he was gonna come running.