Stuck With Me: A Cad Bane Novel

Chapter 20

Warnings: needles, swearing, idk

Word count: 1.1k

 In the end, you decide to go back the next day. It's not Cad who convinces you - he's made it clear that you can make whatever decision you want and he won't try to stop you or change your mind - but Todo. You'd been sitting on one of the crates in the main section of the hull as Cad rummaged around in the kitchen cupboards in search of something to eat. For a coldblood, he has an appetite which seems double than that of the others of his kind. All of the running around after bounties must take its toll on him; you assume that chasing criminals through the shady, crime filled lower levels of Coruscant where the sun can't supply him with energy is an easy way to get hungry.

Anyway, you'd glanced down at the little droid hovering by your side and smiled at him.

'What would you do, Todo, if you were given the choice to unlock something that was always inside you, even if it has nearly no use to you?'
He'd cocked his metal head and looked up at you. 'Well, ma'am, I always say yes to getting upgrades, even if I don't know how helpful they'll be. Most of them tend to turn out to be quite useful.'

You had hummed thoughtfully, reaching down to pat his head and smiling when he huffed indignantly, muttering about how Cad's lack of manners was rubbing off on you. You'd found no fault in his point, and besides, how much could it hurt to give it a try?

That's how you find yourself back in the clinic, sitting in the same leathery blue chair as yesterday, the female Carosite smiling benignly down at you as she retrieves a syringe from some sort of fridge. The needle looks long and far bigger than the one she used before to take your blood, and you find yourself striving to steady your shaky, uneven breaths. The certainty that grasped you after your conversation with Todo seems to have left you, and you can't help but worry. Deafeningly loud, your heart pounds frantically in your chest - what if something goes terribly wrong? What if it doesn't work? What if the Carosite was mistaken, and you're actually some other species which will react badly to whatever she's injecting you with? What if you're allergic to the chemicals? What if your body reacts terribly and you begin to swell up until your airways are fully obstructed and you suffocate before Cad's eyes -

Eyes wide, you glance over at the Duros to your right. He tilts his head, holding his hand out towards you. Gratefully, you intertwine your fingers with his and squeeze. You can hear your quick breaths, like those of a frightened animal, when the Carosite doctor approaches, the syringe filled with an electric blue substance. Gripping Cad's hand harder, you feel him stiffen a little when you tighten your hand around his to the point where his slender bones grind against each other.

It's not just that the needle is far too big, and is glinting far too menacingly in the clinic's lights. It's not even just because you're worried about some terrible side effects. It's that you're still scared, despite his comforting words, that Cad won't want you after your shape shifting capabilities are unlocked, that you won't want you.

In truth, you've never loved yourself - you were just another, terrified, Human sex slave, but now, you have a chance to be different, and you're not sure if you should have decided to take it. But it's too late now; the needle pricks your arm, and as the female Carosite gently pushes down the plunger, you wonder if the fear coursing through your veins is something like what Cad's bounties feel; powerless now, trapped and drowning in the sands of time, not able to go back and undo things, just another, tiny, eensy weensy speck of dust in the galaxy for fate and the Maker to do what they will with.

'It'll take a few moments to take effect,' the doctor says in her too - soothing voice. 'Then you can try.'

Your death grip on Cad's hand becomes looser as something not - Human rushes through you. It's as if all the cells in your body have been sleeping all your life, working on autopilot, and now they awake again, potent and singing for change. The very neurons in your brain seem to flash to life, pulsing before your eyes, and everything seems to be clearer, brighter, for a second. Fresh, strong legs spring you up as you leap from the chair, taking in the familiar yet foreign room.

You swallow, the sound too loud in the silent room. 'Should I - should I try?'
Cad shrugs. 'Why not, li'l lady?'
You make a face. 'How?'
The Carosite doctor laughs. 'I assume it will come naturally, if you wish it to happen, as it does with Shi'ido children when they are very young.'

You glance over at Cad. He smiles at you, and you take in his red eyes, faintly glowing in the shadow of his hat, his blue cheeks, near gaunt, the dull metal of his breathing tubes beneath. His face is a craggy landscape, his skin criss crossed with countless scars; a small valley sits at the side of his mouth, lifting it into an ever present smirk. And yet his eyes are soft, his slender fingers still clasped in yours.

It happens within the span of a few seconds; a strange pain shoots through you, not entirely unpleasant, more like the feeling your legs get after a night with Cad. It feels as if your skeleton is collapsible, as if the bones are sliding over each other and shortening and lengthening all at once, as if your flesh and skin are stretching like soft clay around your body, willing to take any shape you command it to form. The odd sensation of rising overcomes you as the ground shrinks away from you, and you glance over at Cad, who gapes at you, eyes wide, the expression on his face a swirling cauldron of confusion and pride.

You glance down at your hands. Familiar blue fingers look right back. Oh, you hear yourself say in a deep, gravelly, like - the - devil voice, and you take a step forward, amazed by the power awakened in your limbs. Almost crashing into a nearby table, you stumble to a halt, unused to the new proportions of your body. Eyes darting around the room, you catch sight of your reflection in a glass cabinet - red, faintly glowing eyes, blue, scar flecked skin, a sharp toothed smirk. You smile, and your mirrored face grins back.

Turning, adjusted now to your new form, you lock eyes with Cad. It must look terrifying, two identical Duros, staring at each other with knife - like teeth and crimson glowing eyes, their scarred faces twisted into indistinguishable grins.

You cock your head. 'Well, hello there, li'l man.'