Annkoto - P5

Annkoto - Chapter 6: I Want That to Happen Again

It's drizzling outside, and it's pretty late out. Eleven-thirty. It's not like Ann had a curfew to be worried about. But if she's not quick she may miss one of the last trains of the night.

Ann: "Ugh what was I doing."

She's walking pretty fast, too caught up with her own thoughts to notice how wet the rain's getting her.
Her thoughts are racing.

Ann (Internal): (Why did I stay so late?)

Ann: (Why did I think it was okay for me to ask that? She seemed... okay with it but she stood up so fast.)
...
Ann: (What's wrong with me, why did I want to hold her hand in the first place? We were having so much fun too...)

Ann: (Why did I feel such a fluttery feeling in my chest?)

Ann: (I've never felt this way about Shiho, even when we've hugged, so... why? Isn't that just a normal thing friends do? What is this feeling? What even am I feeling?)
...
Ann makes it to the train station, arriving just in time to grab a seat on the almost completely empty train car.

Ann: (I wasn't thinking.)

Ann: (Ever since she grabbed and held onto my hand that day, I couldn't stop thinking about it.)

Ann: (I've never held someone's hand before.)
...
Ann: (Her hands are so soft too, it was probably the most warmth and comfort I've felt in a while.)
...
Ann: (No, it's late, I was tired, and I asked that out of impulse. Because I... wanted to? Ugh this doesn't make any sense.)

Ann: (She didn't refuse though, we were almost there. But we were... interrupted.)

Ann: (Her beautiful red eyes felt like they were sparkling. Once our eyes met I never wanted to look away.)

Ann: (WHY am I making this so weird. I'm such a creep.)

Ann: (But I...)
She sighs deeply.

Ann: (I want that to happen again.)

...

Sae: "I'm going in my room."

Makoto (somber tone): "Goodnight sis..."

Sae stops at the doorframe: "So what was with that girl anyway? You never have friends over, and this late?"

Makoto: "Yeah..."

Sae: "I don't know what's gotten into you lately but you better snap out of it. Your future's on the line here."

Makoto: "..."

Sae sighs and closes her bedroom door behind her.

Makoto is sitting down on the sofa, head down, looking dejected. She seems to be removed from reality.
...
A drop falls onto the couch. She returns from her distant gaze and starts wiping the tears off her cheeks.
Makoto pulls her legs to her chest and curls up, as if protecting herself from her surroundings, and focusing on collecting her thoughts.

Makoto (Internal): (Why did she...)

Makoto: (Why did she leave so quickly.)

Makoto: (It was my fault wasn't it. I was being too much. I made her uncomfortable.)

Makoto: (I really messed up.)
...
Makoto: (Should I text her...? No, that would just make things worse.)

Makoto: (Can it get any worse than this though?)

Makoto: (In that moment I felt like everything else in the world was silent. As if a spotlight had been cast. My heart was racing.)

Makoto: (Why was it racing?)

Makoto: (Friendship sure is strange... Is this really how it's supposed to feel?)

Makoto: (I don't really have a point of reference.)

Makoto: (I want to text her, I want to apologize.)
...
Makoto: (Ann was stunning when she was dressed up for her photoshoot.)

Makoto: (She has such a nice figure too...)

Makoto: (Why am I thinking about this all the sudden?)
...
Makoto: (She said she was going to start working out too. I wonder how she looks in gym clothes?)

Makoto's face turns bright red.
...
Makoto: (What have I dazed off thinking about? I'm such a creep.)

Makoto: (I'm avoiding the obvious... aren't I.)

*Flashback*
Ann: "Yeah it's a completely normal thing!"
*Return*

Makoto: (This is all too much for me. My head is swelling.)

Makoto: (I don't understand my feelings, at all. But there is something I know for certain.)

Makoto: (I want that to happen again.)