The Deal

Thirty-Seven-Bernadette

I'm lucky to have left the hospital undetected. I hope Thabo doesn't return to find an empty bed back at the ER anytime soon. God forbid, if I bumped into him, or if he caught me leaving, he would only remind me what an idiot I'm being right now. Hours ago, I told myself, I wouldn't fall for any more tricks. That I would only stay put in the ER and fight against whoever was out to kill me. But here I am, wearing a black Lakers cap I silently snatched from a patient, along with a pair of scissors hidden inside the coat; a coat I also stole from a patient.

Right now, I've never felt more afraid than before. Even though few people are waltzing around in this dark of night, I feel like any of them could randomly snatch me, just when I least expect it. Or any of them could have my head bludgeoned to a pulp. Even while taking my phone out to order an Uber, the air around me feels claustrophobic. At least the people don't seem to recognize me as they walk by, pretending to mind their own business. My hands are shaky, but it's definitely not from the chilly breeze. I can't even hold the phone well. I can't concentrate without looking left and right, expecting Yvonne or Bill to take me out at any moment.

How many enemies have I even made that have worked together to ruin my life? What did I ever do to deserve this, anyway? People have told me I was a heartless drunk since the coma, but I've never felt that way. I don't feel like someone who should be wiped off the face of the Earth. I feel like someone who deserves to be left the hell alone. The phone slips from my hand to the concrete pavement. When I reach for it, a hand grabs it before me. I almost reach for the scissors before I decide to stop.

"Sorry, miss," the man says as he hands it to me. With trembling fingers, I snatch it and silently nod. I cover my face with the cap and turn my face before I get any more attention. I hear him mutter and curse to himself as he walks; "Not even a thank you. What a weirdo." As he goes, he utters more curses in Zulu.

Ignoring him, I order the ride and only wait for Jabar to give me the answers I need. My fingers rest on the scissors in my coat as the suspicious civilians pass by.

***

I drop out of the Uber with my mind still plagued by thoughts of being hunted down. An hour later, I make my way to the bridge. Its dark, somber yet peaceful setting irks me. I suddenly feel like I've made a very dumb decision. I should have come up with a backup plan. I should have come out here with someone keeping watch over me. What if Jabar has led me right into Bill's trap?

My mind immediately goes to Bill. If he pops out, I'll be ready for him. That, I can assure myself. If he's planning to take me by surprise, I'm fully prepared for him. I stand and stare down at the beautiful lake below, arms folded. I don't know why standing here gives me flashbacks. I don't know why I once stood here to cry, but one thing is clear. The memory isn't real. It must be a hallucination. It must be the impact at which I slammed my head into the pole that's left me to create false memories.

If I'm hallucinating, then what if Bill, just like the female voice in my head, isn't real? I remind myself not to lean too close to the rail. Armani could appear out of nowhere and toss me over to land on my head again. Except this time, I won't be so lucky. The fall would kill me.

Minutes later, I stand and wait, but the bridge is still empty. I look at the time on my phone; it's 11:50 PM. Great! I should have known better than to listen to him. Without hesitating, I dial his number and call. It only goes to voicemail. I dial him one more time. The call goes to voicemail. My jaw tightening with fury, I record my message to him; "You think you can play games with me? Try taunting me again, and I swear I'll make you pay!"

***

As soon as I make my way past the darkened side of the neighborhood, my phone chimes. When I expect it to be Jabar, it's an unknown number instead. My heart skips a double beat. I really don't want to know who's behind the call, but I answer it anyway.