Ex's to Lovers

Chapter 25

In Which Alfred Implies A LOT Of Stuff He Doesn't Mean To

"How was I supposed to know he was sensitive about his undies?" Alfred griped, holding an ice pack to his face. "Like, what's got his panties in a twist?"

Gilbert, if Alfred were talking to him, might have snickered at the unintended pun. Kiku, a second year from the grade below, did not. Honestly, it was a mystery to those around them on just how the noisy and excitable Alfred had managed to befriend the quiet and reserved Kiku, not to mention they weren't even in the same year, but in a small school it'd be strange if he didn't run into underclassmen every now and then.

Kiku, who had the misfortune of  playing a game Alfred liked, and sharing a lot of his interests in games and comics, had found himself suddenly one of Alfred's close friends after one such accidental run in.  Mathew had asked him to patient with Alfred, and Arthur had shaken his head, which was better than Gilbert, who offered condolences amongst snickers, or his own older brother who had warned him to never, under any circumstances, lend Alfred money, and Alfred tended to forget to pay it back.

Luckily for Alfred, Kiku was the type of person who would never consider being someone's friend a misfortune, and was also much more reasonable and thought things through better than either Alfred and Gilbert, so much so that his advise was Arthur-verified that Alfred could accept it without any concerns. (For the record, Gilbert's advise was outright blacklisted, but Gilbert had advised to ignore that, so obviously Alfred had trusted his best friend.) Kiku, after a moment of careful consideration, despite not quite understanding why Alfred had gone to Ivan's house and picked up his underwear to start with, made a meek comment.

"But Alfred, I think most people don't want other people touching their undergarments?"

Alfred considered this, and while he did see how strangers touching his boxers would be Wierd and creepy, it wasn't like his friend couldn't? Gilbert had once worn a pair of his clean boxer on his head and challenged Alfred to a towel fight. (Gilbert had won.) Alfred was also pretty sure that Mathew just took Alfred's underwear when he ran out of his own. He knew he took his twin's clothes whenever he felt like it having come to this point, Alfred tried to understand in his usual clumsily, inelegant way.

"But I'm not people," he stressed, "Its me."

Kiku, who was quite sharp and observant, caught onto the implications Alfred hadn't realized he'd given, and turned quite red. Alfred remained oblivious, and continued to talk about Ivan's underwear. Beginning to feel incredibly uncomfortable, slightly embarrassed, and a bit sexually harrased, Kiku fumbled to change the subject.

"Um, Alfred! We have a math test tomorrow, right? Did you study?"

It was a ball from a completely different park, but it still did what Kiku wanted- distracted Alfred.

"Oh shit." 

Alfred turned pale. Usually, he would have already studied quite hard, just to surpass Ivan, but lately with the rumours and the pranks and so on, he'd forgotten about that. Suddenly he remembered why Ivan had been out earlier that night, the reason Tori's had given when he begrudgingly told Alfred this information.

"Ivan won't be home tonight. Me, him, and a couple others are having a study session at my place."

Alfred ground his teeth. That bastard Ivan had pranked him with an easy, long-lasting prank to distract Alfred from studying, so Ivan could beat him!  Alfred's eyes hardened.

Not if he could help it.