behind walls | nomin

15 | sorry, heart

jeno felt a knot of nervousness in his stomach as he gently opened the door to his mothers bedroom. 

the hinges creaked loudly, emitting an unexpected shriek that made him curse under his breath. carefully, he whispered, "ma?" hoping not to disturb her too much.
"jeno?" came the sleepy response. "why are you up at this time?"
"my friend got in a little accident. he lives alone. can he please stay for the night? ill explain everything to you in the morning," he explained, biting his lip apprehensively.
"of course, darling, but go to bed now," his mother replied with a yawn.
"thanks so much, ma," jeno whispered gratefully before gently shutting the door behind him.

in jenos bedroom, he found jaemin waiting. "na, you could stay. how about your parents?"
"i told them i was going to stay at a friends place before leaving, but I guess they just assumed I was going to stay there for the night. hey haven't called me tonight or anything," jaemin explained.
jeno gestured for jaemin to make himself comfortable. as they settled, jaemin found his favorite spot, laying his head on jenos lap. with each touch, caress, and gentle peck, their hearts swelled with love. it was a deep romantic connection, and despite the recent occurrence, neither of them could help but appreciate every moment of tenderness.
"oh, I see. are you sure you dont want anything to eat? i promise its not a big deal at all," jeno offered, leaning down to kiss jaemins forehead. his soft, dulcet lips met jaemins smooth, frail skin in a tender gesture.
"no, love, i promise i will tell you when I get hungry, alright?" jaemin replied, a small yet illuminated smile gracing his face. jeno couldnt help but feel a warmth in his chest as he gazed at that familiar, comforting smile. it was a smile he had missed dearly, and in that quiet moment, the connection between them grew stronger, fueled by the unspoken understanding of shared care and affection.

the sun began its ascent, casting a warm glow through the sheer curtains of jenos bedroom window. the room gradually filled with the soft, golden light, creating a pacific atmosphere. the sky outside painted itself in hues of vivid orange, a breathtaking canvas adorned with the delicate strokes of dawn. wispy clouds drifted lazily across the expanse, their edges catching the first light of the day and reflecting it in a dazzling dance.

jeno, already awake, took a moment to appreciate the beauty unfolding outside his window.
beside him, jaemin remained fast asleep, unaware of the picturesque morning scene outside. his peaceful form was untouched by the waking world, the rise of the sun not yet disturbing his slumber. the room, filled with the soft sounds of morning, held a quiet stillness as jeno silently adored jaemins peaceful face.

jeno couldnt help but smile, appreciating the contrast between the vibrant world outside and the tranquility within. as the day began to unfold, the morning sunlight continued to bathe the room, creating a tranquil haven that cradled the two lovers in a moment suspended between the quietude of dawn and the promise of a new day.

out of a sudden, jenos phone buzzed, indicating a notification. 

mom
you awake jen?

you
yea but my friends still sleeping

mom
oh ok hun
im leaving to buy some groceries
you need anything?

you
u think u can pick up some shrimp chips for me?
maybe some ramen too

mom
no problem
want to take your friend out for lunch later?

you
ill check up on him when hes awake but im sure he would love to

mom
alright 
i was planning on heading to that tonkotsu place

you
oh yea that place is great
thanks a lot mom:)

mom
of course dear
take care of your friend, im leaving now

you
see u later ma love u

jeno softly placed his phone down, slowly awakening more and more into the dark depths of real life. he shifted his gaze to the side, where jaemin lay still in slumber, wrapped in the realm of his own dreams. the room was enveloped in a soothing hush, the only sound being the soft rhythm of jaemins breathing.

despite the tranquility surrounding him, jeno began finding it challenging to maintain the peacefulness of the moment. disturbing thoughts lingered at the edges of his consciousness, and as he watched jaemin sleep, a storm of worries and uncertainties brewed within jenos mind.
the subtle rise and fall of jaemins chest, the gentle patterns of his breath, seemed to contrast with the turmoil in jenos thoughts. what would they do if someone in school ever finds out? or worse. what if his dad finds out? there was always a possibility within.

jeno sighed, his internal struggle evident in the furrow of his brow. he contemplated whether to wake jaemin and share the weight of his thoughts or just let him continue to rest undisturbed. he decided to wait. after all, he had gone through so much the previous night, and is well-deserving of a long, still sleep.

it didnt take jaemin long to wake up. he rubbed his eyes and yawned. 
"good morning, love. did you sleep well?" jeno was quick to question.
"good morning." jaemin mumbled, slightly dazed. "i think i slept well. what time is it?"
"38 past 11." jeno tucked himself in to give jaemin a warm hug. "my mom went out to buy groceries. she also wondered if you wanted to get lunch with us later."
"oh, of course. where at?"
"that tonkotsu place down the street. nothing fancy." he laughed.
"oh my god, i love that place!" jaemin laughed in harmony.
"really? its seriously so underrated."
"right. when does she want us to be ready?"
"ill send a quick message." jeno picked up his phone. he hesitated before asking, "hey, love. i know it might not be suitable to talk about this right now, but im just genuinely curious. should we just... you know, keep the act up at school?" 
the atmosphere instantly changed. the relaxation grew into discomfort. jaemin opened his mouth, but paused.
"do we have another choice?" jaemin eventually said in a low tone.
"i dont know... but..." jeno sighed. he felt awkward holding jaemin in his arms. "i feel so bad, all the time. because i love you so much and i should be cherishing you and being proud over you. it feels like i am ashamed over our relationship..."
jaemin sighed too. "i know. it hurts but its all temporary. think about it, we have about 2 years left. why overcomplicate it with a million problems when we already have a good amount of our own?"
"i know... i know youre right and all, but..." 
jenos phone buzzed. he picked it up and quicky scanned the message.
"i cant stand genuinely bullying you and harming you, and especially having other harm you right in front of my eyes. i should be protecting you."
"i can reassure you, prioritize protecting your reputation just these two years." jaemin shut his eyes hearing those words spat out of his mouth, a visible discomfort etched on his face. the weight of the topic at hand bore down on him, the conversation delving into territory that was far from light-hearted. emotions churned within him, threatening to overflow, and he braced himself for the impact of the words exchanged.
at the same time, jenos heart seemed to shatter into a million pieces as he absorbed the weight of those words. the heaviness settled within him, a profound ache that resonated through every fiber of his being. helplessness washed over him, a feeling he wasnt accustomed to. jeno was used to being in control, managing almost every aspect of his life with ease. now, confronted with a situation beyond his control, he felt like he was slowly losing authority over the very foundations he had built.

as the weight of the conversation lingered, both jaemin and jeno found themselves navigating uncharted territory. in the quiet aftermath, the room felt charged with the unspoken, a heavy atmosphere that echoed the complex emotions swirling between them.