The Smile You Hold

Darkness of a Lake

Where I stay is a lake. It's so clear and blue that I thought it was fake. When it rains, it gets bigger, reaching its body across the land. When the summer rolls around, it gets smaller but more lively. The fireflies buzz around. The fish sprout around. The elder willow reaches its leaves, touching the soft grass beneath. I stay there, along the shore. Enjoying the warmth and glow. The clear lake I came to love consoles me in the dark, releasing the aches of my soul. Once it rises, I go along, bidding a sweet bye to see again tomorrow.

What was a secret spot for me, became home to another. A man with onyx hair shining in the crystal body. His eyes shedding zircon crystals. Each created a ripple in the fabric of the crystal clear body. His cries went unheard by most, yet not me. The elder tree cascaded its shadow on me, avoiding the silvery glow of the moon. The only silhouette glowing was the man with different eyes. One as blue as sapphire, the other as warm as amber. Only if they weren't washed by sorrow.

A day of sorrow and another to come. He sat still, cleansed by the citrine sun. His cadaverous build sat still. His cold skin was washed by the silver moon and cleansed by the burning sun. He stood with a tremor and walked away. He disappeared into the woods, walking a distance far.

***

A fortnight by and once again, swallowed by grief, he turned his tears towards the lake. Once more ripples cut through the calm. His drowned misery was drained by the moss. The moonlit flowers danced around him. The soft grass tickled his sickly skin. He gasped for air as he heaved out a cry. His pain was swallowed by the forest's sigh. His scarred mouth let painful wails escape his chest.

As nervous as I was, I felt the need to console his howling soul. With a soft step, I revealed myself to the diamond glow. Once more and I fell into the grass. Another and a flower brushed against my leg. Once more, I was there. I knelt down and wrapped my arms around his build. He was small and bony. If mistaken, fragile like moss.

His cry stopped, and air left his lungs. He was surprised. Shocked someone saw him this vulnerable. However, he was clouded by pain to care at all. He fell into my arms, melting like wax against my touch. His crystal tears seeped into my yukata. Such sorrow showed by tears and yowls.

"What brought such pain to you?" I spoke softly as I could. The forest did its own consoling. The water held us dear. The grass kept us warm, and the flowers kept the sorrow.

"Memories." He whispered with a coarse voice. One rubbed with rocks and sand and filled with salt.

"Past is painful. Future untold. The present is a gift to cherish. The past shapes us all, for the better or the worse. No path is wrong. You just have to accept it and learn to your story." I stroked his onyx hair. Such soft hair that glowed sapphire in the silver light.

"I'm scared." His voice failed to hide a slight quiver hidden in his words.

"Tell why?"

"What's not to fear?"

"Give me an example."

"What if history repeats?"

"Then you'll know how to get past it. You've gone through it before."

"What. . . what if it hurts?"

"Pain teaches us a lesson."

"What if. . . if."

"No need for 'What if.' All you need is to live. Even with not faith, a person who knows how to live will flow like water." I turned to the lake that ambienced beside us. It was still and radiated, such as light given by the moon.

No words were exchanged. Just time flowed by. Till the morning rose, I stood by the waters, comforting the lost boy. When the golden glow blew the silver away, it was a sign to go. I stood with the boy in tow. I guided him through the winding trees to my quiet home. Quite for now till the workers come.

"Thank you for your hospitality." He said as he opened the sliding door.

"It's truly no worry. I just want you to be okay." I placed a tray with tea and rice crackers. A small bowl heald crimson cherries, brought in by Uzui from a while ago.

A silence fell over us as I handed out the tea. My garden was on full display. The pond, the trees, and bushes filled with berries. Flowers littered the grass, which swayed with the warm breeze.

"Why."

I turned to face him. His gaze on the pond with Koi fish swimming freely.

"Sorry? Can you elaborate?" I sat beside him, tea in my hands. He took the other cup in his own.

"Why did you help me?" His gaze went everywhere but my own. He was too afraid to meet my eyes.

"I only consoled you. You did all the work yourself."

His stare fell on his tea. He was deep in thought and swallowed my the mist. His double coloured eyes were unique. One of man, other of a reptile. His scar badly healed. It seemed to have been infected during its healing process. Ridges and lumps covered the uneaven skin. However, it looked quite fragile. Enough for one slice of a leaf to cut through.

"Well. . . thank you. You better keep this between us." He looked away, too embarrassed to act tough.

"I will." With a chuckle, I sipped the tea. Enjoying the herbal taste alongside the wonderous view.

"I thought you were an emotionless freak." He blurted out, seemingly with no other thought.

"Well, isn't that what everybody thought?" I kept my polite attitude. I knew he didn't mean any harm. Just like Muichiro, they had difficulty with words.

"Well. . . Not everyone." He looked down. Sipping his tea. "Not Mitsuri or Shinobu. And now Uzui and Muichiro and even Sanemi like you. How?"

"I didn't do much. They just gave me a chance." I had an unknowing smile on my face.

"A chance? What kind?"

"Are there different chances for each scenario?" He thought about the question, not too hard and a short amount of time.

"Well. No. I guess not."

"Chance is just an opportunity. They gave me the opportunity to be me. That's really all." I took a rice cracker. He seemed to follow my lead. "Is that a satisfying answer?"

"Yes." Without another word, we stayed in silence, enjoying our snacks.

***