Reincarnation in the PJO verse: Volume 1

『The Exit』

Diedre sat on the ground and muttered to himself, "I killed people today. I killed fifty people today." Blood was still decorating his sword and he felt sick.

In his last life, he couldn't even kill a mosquito without feeling guilty and here he was killing actual people. He looked at the blood on his sword and around him and felt absolutely nothing. Like his body and mind had shut down on him.

He heard shouts of his name coming in through the mental fog and decided it was no time to mope. He needed to account for the dead and heal those living.

He did not look back on the scenery.

His siblings and he ran around healing those with mortal wounds and he caught the vision from the corner of his eyes of Lee and Castor. He sighed in relief that he had saved at least two casualties from the war but his traitorous mind wandered to all those he could not save.

Nico was still recuperating in the clearing with strict instructions from him and even Will ran around helping with supplies. As he bandaged the wound on Lee's leg he heard, "You okay?"

Lee looked up at him questioningly as he asked and Diedre wanted to cry. He had killed fifty people and it would haunt him. He had fought in war and would fight in many more to keep all of them safe and yet there were so many dead. 

He was useless.

"I will be," is all he said even though he did not believe it.

♬♬♬

There were too many goodbyes that night.

Diedre looked solemn. Even though he had saved Castor and Lee, it didn't mean he could save the others never mentioned. 

He hated this. They were all. so young and their shrouds so small. All lost to cause where the parents wouldn't hesitate to smite them. The worst feeling was that he knew all those who were burnt and had seen them smile and laugh with their friends or even him.

His heart hurt as he burnt the golden shrouds, of siblings he knew well and he felt-

He felt absolutely nothing.

Which was bad but he couldn't bring himself to feel anything.

Pollux and Castor came to thank him but all he could offer was a weak smile at them. Like it was even an option to let someone die in front of him. Castor hesitantly offered him a bottle of strawberry slush and Diedre tried to offer a more genuine smile in return.

They spent the next day treating the wounded, which was almost everybody. The satyrs and dryads worked to repair the damage to the woods.

At noon, the Council of Cloven Elders held an emergency meeting in their sacred grove. The three senior satyrs were there, along with Chiron, who was in wheelchair form. His broken horse leg was still mending, so he would be confined to the chair for a few months until the leg was strong enough to take his weight. The grove was filled with satyrs and dryads and naiads up from the water—hundreds of them, anxious to hear what would happen. Juniper, Annabeth, Percy and Diedre stood by Grover's side.

Silenus wanted to exile Grover immediately, but Chiron persuaded him to at least hear evidence first, so we told everyone what had happened in the crystal cavern, and what Pan had said. Then several eyewitnesses from the battle described the weird sound Grover had made, which drove the Titan's army back underground.

"It was panic," insisted Juniper. "Grover summoned the power of the wild god."

"Panic?" Percy asked.

"Percy," Chiron explained, "during the first war of the gods and the Titans, Lord Pan heard a horrible cry that scared away the enemy armies. It is—it was his greatest power—a massive wave of fear that helped the gods win the day. The word panic is named after Pan, you see. And Grover used that power, calling it forth from within himself."