Billionaire's Revenge

20 - Mentally Exhausted

CHAPTER 20

VIVIANA KNIGHT

I returned back regretting whatever I confessed. I shouldn't have said so much.

I didn't want to show him how vulnerable he had made me. I didn't want to tell him what he has caused me yet I spilled everything.

Gosh I am so dumb!!!

I laid on my bed, trying to not think of the stupidity I did.

Jeez, the conclusion from this is, I should stop listening to my heart. My heart is stupid.

"Viv." Del's voice broke my thoughts.

"We didn't talk about today." She said.

"What about today?" I asked.

"You and Xavier. What happened?"

I sat up on my bed "He is an ass and I am stupid. That's all I have to say."

"I can't understand Viv. What are you talking about?"

"I told him everything. Every damn thing I felt when I texted him, what he means to me."

"No."

"Yes. I did. I told him how much he made me suffer."

"Are you crazy?"

"I just lost my mind and I said it. I couldn't stop."

"Great! You fucked up."

"I know." I said, rubbing my face with my hands."

"One thing Viv, you cannot show a guy that he affects you. You cannot show him that you are weak."

"I know."

"Yet you did it. I cannot understand what is wrong with you."

"Somewhere I wanted him to know what he has caused me, how much hurt I was, how humiliated I felt when he never treated me like a normal person."

"You showed him how vulnerable he made you. And all the guy I have met in my life they all love to hurt women."

"I regret telling him but at that point I just got carried away."

"I'll tell you something Viv, you tell a guy his importance in your life and he will treat you like trash. But if you tell him he doesn't matter to you then he will treat you like a princess."

I stared at her for a while then laid back on the bed cursing myself.

What if he starts treating me the way he used to? I will not be able to bare so much again.

The suffering was too much in the past. I know this way, I am destroying myself but I like it. I like what we have.

While thinking, I don't remember when I fell asleep.

The next morning again the classes. I didn't have the strength nor the mood to attend the classes but I had to. I dragged myself from the bed.

As I reached the class my eyes first fell on him but unlike other days today he didn't spare me a single glance, not even from the corner of the eyes.

Abby took the seat beside Xavier's row and on the fifth table. And as usual I was at the corner. He didn't show any movement, he was sitting straight leaning against the chair with his hands crossed over his chest.

After last evening, my mind has been a chaos. I said things I shouldn't have. I was too caught up in my emotions. I regret everything I said.

And after Del said, he would treat me like trash because he knows what he is to me, I am super scared.