Her Broken Sky

Chapter 1

A tale of one human lost among the billions on Earth whose life holds many lessons to be found.

I spent the first two decades of my life waiting for someone to see me, to care enough to notice my discontent, to stand by me through it all so I wouldn't have any regrets. I was so sure that there must be someone. I know I shouldn't be hard on myself, I just wish I went about it in another way. One that's bright and without any regrets. I wish I didn't give in and become bitter, oblivious to all the good I had. But I'm done with that. Now that I know without a shadow of a doubt that I'm on my own, I'm done waiting for something that's not going to happen. I know after all these years that no one would care if I simply wasted away. For most of my life I felt left behind and not included. It's time for me to take control of my life. To do as much as I can for myself because I don't want to feel like that again. So young and to know what it is to be filled with regret. Regret over not seeing beyond myself, not seeing what's best for my future, foolishly hoping that someday, someone would care, thinking that I was safe, that I wouldn't be left to rot. But no. I used to think that I knew what I wanted but now I'm not so sure. With the passing of time, my future grows more and more uncertain. I'm blamed for every flaw, every wrong, every mistake. That's all that anyone cares to see not bothering to understand why it's come to this. The way my family treats me is what led to me giving up on myself. Potential and ambition forfeited among the sorrow.

After all I've done for my siblings, giving them the benefit of the doubt, believing we're in it together, they betrayed me over and over again. And over the years, my trust in them faded until nothing was left. Even if they were to have good intentions I wouldn't trust it anymore. Funny how things change, I used to idolize them, wanting them to want my company, trusting them completely. But that naïveté I had did nothing but bring me more and more pain. An innocent child was made to know loneliness and cruelty before she could understand what it meant or what to do with it.

Yes, it's unfortunate... but I need to keep moving forwards. I can't allow the darkness to beat me again even if it only gets worse. I need to have goals to work towards and think of my future in a positive light. I can't let the past overshadow my entire life. What's done is done. It is what it is. It's time for me to accept it, put it behind me, and move on. Here's to new beginnings.