Everything To Lose

Chapter Twenty One

I don't know how long it has been, I am so thirsty. The pains in my stomach - no doubt from hunger are crippling me - I have took to reliving myself in an old mop bucket. It feels like forever since they left me here. How long can a wedding last? I have slept so I have lost all track of time. There was a lot of shouting and screaming ages ago and since then everything has gone silent. I can't scream anymore my voice is so hoarse and my legs feel like jelly when I stand.

Will they let me die here?

I keep replaying the scene over and over in my head. She said she would let me free, but she hasn't. Why didn't I fight them? Why did I just stand there mute knowing what they had planned? I wonder if I do survive this will my baby? Does he stand a chance when he is still a small fetus? I don't know whether it's a him, I don't think he is even a baby yet at four weeks. I never bothered to check. I sob at the thought. I don't even know what is happening to my body or how big my baby is because I was so selfish. Maybe this is my punishment. I didn't deserve this baby to start with, I even thought of terminating him. Only for a second but still... Maybe this is God's punishment for my selfishness.

I wonder if they are married now? Of course they are. I adjust my body when the cold numbs the leg I am resting on and try to settle into sleep, I am not so cold or sore when I sleep. I could just rest my eyes a little while. Maybe when I wake up I can be free.

'We got something. Fuck get me an ambulance now!' A voice I don't recognize shouts above me as he lifts my aching body off the floor.

'Fuck your freezing.' He curses to himself as he wraps me in his coat. I whimper at all the jostling and he mumbles an apology.

'Can I go now. They said I had to wait until the wedding was over. But it felt like so long...' I try to ask him but my voice won't work. He is shouting above me at people all wearing matching jackets. Funny it looks like it says FBI. Maybe I am dreaming again.

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I wake up groggy but warm and comfy at least, I know this is a hospital. Where else has white dull wall and is filled with machines. The beeping is driving me insane, it pierces through me making the pain in my head stab into me.

'She was down there four days! They told us, you told us she ran! Instead the forensic team find her half dead in the fucking cellar. Tell me York why I shouldn't have your arse for this fuck up?' A really angry voice bellows from outside my door. Wait did he say York? Like Dominic. No he must mean Dante, we are in a hospital. Why is he mad at Dante?

'I just want to see her Boss, please?' It is Dominic, he sounds awful. I try to call out but I have no voice.

'What the fuck happened in that house? This is a major fuck up! One of our main suspects is nearly dead and the other isn't speaking. The Mother and Sister are paying the best lawyers to shove their foot so far up my arse I can taste the Italian fucking leather. So no Agent York! You can explain WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED!'

Main suspect? Agent York? What? I feel dizzy again and hit the nurses button. I need answers. Is my baby okay for starters?

Seconds later three people burst into my room. Only one I recognize, as Dominic stands at the foot of my bed his eyes fixed on me. Next to him is an older man with salt and pepper hair. His features are sharp and prominent as he stares directly at me like I am something he needs to figure out. The young nurse shyly brushes past them and begins checking my monitors. She seems fluster by their presence. Join the club.

'Is my baby okay?' I question but it comes out like heavy breaths. I sound like I smoke 100 cigar's a day. I have no voice what so ever. I want to cry in frustration when she stares blankly at me. I look to Dominic pleading with my eyes for him to read my mind. I know he can't but I am desperate. I nearly cry in relief when Mr Salt and Pepper places a white pad and pen on my lap.