Hit The Volley

Building Confidence

The next day, I woke up at around half 6 in the morning. I am so gassed about what happened yesterday. The way she put her lips on mine was like a completely different feeling. I feel so much happier now. I look next to me, and I see Leah, still sleeping. I didn't wanna wake her since it was very early, so I decide to go on my phone for a while. But then when I opened Tik Tok, I remembered that my volume was on full blast, and by the time I realised, it was too late. The loud volume blasted through the speakers, waking up Leah. I instantly turned it down, and she just looked up at me with a smile.

"Sorry." I quickly say and put my phone away. 

"No, its okay, I was gonna get up anyways." She says with a smile. Her dimples look adorable on her. She looks up at me, and there is a bit of hair on her face, and it was kinda triggering me. So, I just decided to take a deep breath and gently tuck her hair behind her ear. She didn't even say anything. She just went REALLY red. Its weird though. We had out first kiss yesterday and then I am still nervous. Maybe I just need to step out of my comfort zone a little but more. 

"So.. are you planning on going anywhere today?" I ask. I dont want her to go anywhere. 

"No, I don't really have anything planned. You?" She asks me. 

"No, I don't really have anything either." I say, and she just nods at me. 

"Do you wanna go on a walk later to the forest? I have a cool place to show you." I ask her, and she instantly gets up. 

"Yeah, I would love to! I need to get changed first, I havent got changed since yesterday." She says with a laugh. I have to laugh too. Neither of us got changed last night.

"You can borrow some of my clothes. I dont mind, really." I say as she gets up. She stops for a while, and looks back at me.

"Are you sure? I don't want me scent on your clothes." she says with a slight laugh. 

"No, no. Its okay. I like your scent." I say, and she grows a smile on her face with rosey cheeks. Oh my days, why did I say that? She's gonna think I am cringe now. 

"Well, I guess I am raiding your wardrobe then." She says, running to my room while I jokingly chase her, making her run faster. As she approaches my bed, I rugby tackle her so she lands on her back, with me above her. Her hand is on my shoulder, and we just stare into each others eyes, heavily breathing. I look at her lips, and look back into her eyes, and I quickly lick my lips, hoping she would do what I am thinking about. 

"Come on Hayley, we are gonna be late." Leah eventually says, leaving me in the same position, without her under me. She just left me. I think she went to the toilet or something.

Bruh.

I sigh and get up, changing into my clothes. I wear a beige hoodie and beige jogging bottoms, with a black north face coat. Just as I finish spraying the last bit of my perfume, Leah comes back. She looks at me up and down for a bit. I slightly chuckle at that. 

"Enjoying the view?" I ask. She looks up at me with her bright red face.

"Yeah, you just look.. very hot." She whispers the last part. My heart almost exploded. Did The Leah Williamson  just call me hot? My cheeks went bright red and I could feel sweat running down the back of my head. 

"What are you gonna wear?" I ask, to quickly change the subject. 

"Well, I need to see what's in your wardrobe first. Unless you wanna see me naked, I suggest you leave." She tells me, and I let out a giggle. I just cant stop smiling at her. I actually wanna see her naked though. Not in a weird way obviously. But I at least wanna see her abs.

"Do you actually wanna see me naked?" She asks, with a joking tone. 

"N-No." I stutter. I suck at lying.

"Its fine. You can see me half naked. But no where else, otherwise that would be a bit weird." She says with a giggle at the end.

"Alright." I just say. I sound like a weirdo, but I just need to see this. She takes her shirt off, and turns around to look at me. She is honestly stunning. Her toned abs and her strong biceps make her look 10 times better. I defiantly will be keeping this in mind. 

"Alright, thats enough. Get lost." She says, pushing me out.

"Hey, this is my house you know." I say with a smile. She also smiles at that. 

"I'll come out later." She says, pushes me and slams the door. I giggle a bit, and wait for her in the kitchen. A few minutes later, she comes back, wearing my grey jacket, white shirt and my cargos. Even though the whole outfit is mine, she still looks stunning. 

"Do you not need a coat?" I ask. It looks like bloody Antarctica outside.

"No, its fine. I'll live." She tells me. I believe her, but I am still quite worried. She comes and sits down next to me, and I just put my arm around her on the sofa out of reflex. She doesn't even say anything back. She just cuddles me and we stay like this for around 2 minutes. 

"Come on, we will be late." She says, getting up and kissing the bottom of my chin. I love these unexpected kisses. They feel amazing. I follow her outside, and we walk and talk all the way into the woods. Then when we get there, I find her walking a lot closer to me. I don't do anything since there are a lot of people, but once everyone has gone, I slowly take her hand. Her hands are so warm. I can see her looking at me, but I continue to look straight. We walk for another 5 minutes, until it starts to rain. 1 drop. Then another, then another. It soon starts heavily raining, but I continue to walk acting like its nothing, still holding her hand. I don't wanna chicken out just coz of water from the sky.

"Hayley?" She asks.

"Yeah?" She stops first, making me stop, and I look at her. Just then, she puts her hand at my cheek and pulls me in for a kiss. The kiss is full of love, and I feel the water dripping down her face. This moment is so romantic. Because I am slightly taller, she is on her tip toes, gripping onto my neck while my hands are on her waist. After a while, we pull back, and press our wet foreheads together, heavily breathing. 

"Why are you such a good kisser?" She asks with a smile. I have to smile to.

"Just for you." I whisper, and she kisses my nose. This is the moment where I probably thought that I love her. Like really. My first love could be my only true love. 

"Are you okay?" I ask. She is soaking, and I think she is slightly shaking because of how cold it is. 

"Yeah, I am fine." She says, in a shaky voice. I didn't bring a spare coat, so I take off my coat and put it on her. I can see that her face gets confused, to more relaxed. I am not really used to the cold, but if it means preventing my crush from hyperthermia then I am all for it. I really need to let her know that I love her, and I need to let her know that I have been lying to her the whole time. The truth is, I have had 2 abusive exes in the last 3 years, and to finally find her makes me so happy. She doesn't even know this. The only think she knows is that she is my first love. And although I would love it to be true, unfortunately it isn't.

-

Once we get home, the second we both take our shoes off, I press her to the wall and smash my lips against hers. I don't even care what she says or does. I gently bite her bottom lip, and she pulls me closer to her. She opens her mouth, and I slip my tongue in, and I quietly moan. It was like I was letting out all my anger and emotions all into one kiss. I am about to attack her neck, but she stops me right there. 

"Woah woah, Rookie, calm down." She says in a calming voice, and I slowly breath out. Suddenly, I feel a tear running down my face. What the fuck? Why am I crying?  I just stare into the distance, knowing that I fucked everything up. From the moment we stepped in till now. She is never gonna let it go. Suddenly, I feel her arms around my body and her head on my shoulder. 

"Shh.. its okay." She tells me, in a very relaxing voice. I don't even hug her back. I just stare even further, with tears still rolling down my face. All the emotions and memories of the past just come shooting back like a gun battle. 

"I get it Rookie, I get it."