jack
[january 6, 2024]
the moment i saw emma with tears streaming down her face, i knew something had happend. once i found out my entire body heated up, thinking what she must of went through and how i chouldn't do anything to stop her.
i sat with her the entire night, i didn't sleep at all. i just laid beside her watching her sleep. for some reason i felt like i was to blame for what happened to her, even though it wasn't i felt like it was. i didn't wanna leave her alone, i wanted to protect her and make sure shes alright. i also wanted to fucking find this guy and kill him.
-
emma started to wake up slowly, her eyes fluttered open. "hi." emma says softly, she smiled at me. "hi bryant." i say, she stretched slwoly and yawned. "you okay?"i ask her, she nods her head. "my head hurts from the drinks but another than that yeah, i'm okay rowdy." she tells me, i smile at her tucking a strand of hair behind her ears. "how long have you been up?" emma asks me, getting up from her bed. "all night." i tell her, she looks back at me confused. "i wanted to make sure you were okay." i tell her, emma looks at me and smiles brightly. "oh rowdy." she jokes, i get up from the bed and walk up to her. "i love it when you call me that." i say, out faces just inches apart. "jack-" emma says, i step back from her. "i'm sorry em, how about we go downstairs okay?" i ask her, she nods her head and follows me out the door.
i lead us down the stairs, i could hear voices from downstairs which meant that everyone was up. "oh look who we have here." i voice said, i look to see my two brothers standing there with everyone else. "lukey boy!" i say walking up to say hi, but instead he pushed past me straight to emma. "i'm luke, jacks totally awesome brother. you must be emma, jack doesn't shut up about you." luke tells her with a smirk, emma laughes and gives him a hug. my older brother quinn comes up behind me and shakes me. "i think luke likes emma more than you rowds." quinn jokes, i shove him away and he laughs. from across the room maddie stares, giving me the dirtiest look.
luke and emma continue talking, i'm surprised he managed to make her laugh as much because its luke. he looks over and sees maddie standing there, he looks confused. "who invited the whore?" luke jokes causing almost everyone to brust out laughing including emma. "i'm a whore now?" maddie asks, everyone goes silent for a moment and we all stare at each other. "yes!" we all chant, incuding her friends. she scuffs and crosses her hands on her hips, she looks at me again. "jack, we're talking right now." maddie says sternly, everybody 'oooohs' and i follow her oustide.
she slams the front door shut and i roll my eyes. "are you fucking kidding me! you're acting like you love her or something." maddie yells. "maybe because i do love her!" i yell back, i was even surprised i said it out loud. "don't forget you cheated on her ass with me, now your brothers saying you talk about her all the damn time." maddie says, she pissed me off all the time but now was different.
i don't even know what i was thinking bringing her here, i was jealous that emma was with trevor so i made the stupidest mistake to bring her here. i honestly don't care for maddie at all anymore, i love emma and i mean it. i thought what i felt for maddie was love, thats why i cheated on emma because i truly believed something was still there between us. i was wrong, nothing was there and emma was on my mind the whole time. maybe this is just wishful thinking, probably mindless dreaming. but if we loved again i swear i'd love her right, i would go back in time and change it but i can't.
"maddie go home, i never wanted you here anyways because truth is you're a slut." i tell her making her jaw drop, suddenly memories came back to me of our break up.
flashback
i walked up the stairs to mine and maddies apartment, i missed her after being gone for so long because of hockey. i carried a beaucet of roses which are her favorite and in my pocket was a promise ring. i've waited ages to give her this, i love her and i know shes the one for me.
i approch our apartment door excited to see her reaction, she didn't know i was coming home so it was the perfect surprise. i scanned the key card slowly and pushed open the door, i looked on the ground to see a hat but it wasn't mine. i walk further into the room to see maddie under some naked guy, i drop the roses in shock. maddie looks and realizes its me, she covers her mouth. "jack! please let me explain." she begs, i shake my head. she grabs a blanket and covers her body up, maddie runs over to me. "baby i didn't know you were coming home, please forgive me i love you!" she screams, i just keep shaking my head still in shock of what i saw. "no you don't." i tell her, she tries to grab my face but i push her away. "no maddie we're done."
i didn't wanna remember that moment anymore, i just wanted her gone. "fine, i'm going." maddie says. "good." was all i said back to her, she rolled her eyes.
-
after hours maddie left, i was relieved to know she wasn't an issue anymore but now my only issue was getting emma to forgive me. i struggled to think of any ideas, i laid on my bed staring at the ceiling waiting for an idea. i've tried tell her i love her and apologizing to her but nothing works. i need her to forgive me even though i'm not sure if i deserve forgiveness. suddenly an idea came to my mind, it wasn't a good one but it was the only one i've got. i run over to my desk and pull out paper and a pen, i take a seat and try to brainstorm what to write to her. i've already apologized and she doesn't seem to care. then i remembered all of our memories, and our song. the song we sung together in the car, the song that we couldn't relate to more.
back to december (taylors version) of course!
i don't know if she'll even forgive me and writing her a note with the lyrics of back to december most likely wont work but i have to try.
i spent awhile writing down the words to the song, with each word i wrote down the more i wanted to cry. i wish she could know how much i regret it, how much i fucking love her..
hey luvss! i'm starting to get so saddd this book may comd to end end soon most likely, i don't know what i'll do when it does to be honest. alsoooo how did we like this chapter, jack is making me wanna cry hes so sweet now! if you guys have any other ideas that'll make this book so goodd let me know! anyways happy reading muah xoxoxo tae
