Just Friends

Chapter XXVII: Love Yourself

Mayari Sekani Thompson

My cheeks hurt so bad from laughing so much. Even though there's barely any sound that can come out when I do laugh I'm still crying from laughter.

The eight of us are in Messiah's living room. Which is new and improved might I add. Messiah and Ms. Sherry got into a really big argument and she sort of kind of kicked him? Honestly she didn't but that's how Messiah took it and as always he ran with it literally to a whole new crib.

All of us came, unknowingly to Siah, and claimed it was his house warming party. He tried to kick us out but a door don't stop anything around here Tj was about to start unscrewing the screws in the door hinges. Don't even ask me where he pulled out a screwdriver from.

"Soooo let's play a game, question mark." Jamor being loud as ever yells louder than everybody's side conversations.

Jay on the other hand is more quiet than Jamor. Which is unusual for him...it's a little suspicious.

I get up from my seat next to Messiah. Who of course is STILL not talking to me. But i'm not worried about him or any guys anymore. I'm strictly focused on me and my craft. I'm gonna start doing hair again once I can keep a conversation going. I'm excited but really i'm just broke.

I walk around the coffee table placed in the middle of the living room and sit next to Jaylen, who just gives me a weak little smile.

I make a confused face at him and he smiles a bit harder and looks down at his hands right after. Well if it wasn't obvious before that something was wrong it definitely is now.

I type on my phone, in my notes, "Are you okay? Did you fight with Jamor? Wanna talk about it?" He grabs my phone and his thumbs hover the keyboard for a few seconds then starts to type. I wonder what it is for him to not even want to say it out loud.

He typed, "If I were allowed to could I kiss you? Not like that but like...yeah, could I maybe?" I look at what he said then look back at him and I lowly ask him why. I wonder why he wants to kiss me? And not for that reason? Then for what reason?

He holds out his hand for my phone again and types, "Can we go on a walk? It'll be quick. Probably." I furrow my brows at him. It's lowkey giving setup but it's Jaylen, so I trust him. I nod my head and we both abruptly stand up making some people stare at us.

Jay speaks up before my fingers can type. "We'll be back." Is all he says, which definitely won't fly by Messiah annoying self.

"Back from where? Where y'all finna go?" Messiah asks putting his phone down on his lap and giving us his full attention.

"Yeah like thee fawk?? Y'all ain't even invite us??" Tj says rolling his eyes over and over again and moving his neck all extra.

"Damn y'all niggas could've just said y'all ain't wanna play don't gotta leave and shit." Melvin says sticking up his middle finger, I stick out my tongue to him and he shoos me away like imma fly or something. He's lucky i've found god because I would've shooed his already receding hairline completely away.

Melvin and Jaylen make eye contact and Jaylen turns around walking towards the door abruptly.

I type on my phone, "We will be back y'all. Text us if y'all need anything while we're out." Siah mugs me and just stares, his favorite thing to do.

"Ouu wait can I come toooo?? I need to get something from the corner store." Aoi asks smiling showing all her teeth. I nod and so does Jay and the three of us walk out the door, eventually out of the complex Aoi is the first to speak up.

"Sooo what's going on? This energy so weird right now." She says walking backwards and ahead of us to face us.

I shrug my shoulders and look at Jaylen who's just looking at the ground. I start to type on my phone right before I can type a full word I hear sniffling.

Jaylen starts walking faster he goes past Aoi and towards the open lake not to far from the apartment buildings. What is going on with him?

"Jay what's wrong? What happened? Why are you crying?" Aoi asks catching her breath we both had to do a little jog to catch to Jaylen lanky self.

"I...I think that i'm gay? I've never done anything with a guy but I have had sex with women and i've never felt satisfied. I don't know." Jaylen says wiping his tears and I immediately hug him my body shivers a little when I do and he hugs me back.

"Jay why are you crying tho boo? I'm lesbian. There's nothing wrong with being gay Jaylen and don't ever feel like there is. You need to see for yourself if you are, but only when you're ready. We love you Jay that fact will never change."

"Thank you Aoi, thank you Yari." He says stepping back and wiping his face again. "But i'm not worried about other people accepting me, I never gave a fuck. The only person I don't want to tell is Jamor."

I start making dumb faces at him when he gets the memo he starts to respond again in an unsure tone, "What if he doesn't accept me? I'm his identical twin I know that but what if he thinks differently of me and start to dislike me if I really am gay? I don't want to lose my brother he's all I have." Tears start to swarm his eyes and began falling again. I return to my position with my head against his chest and my arms around his torso.

The three of us stay out there for a little longer, walking around, talking, and watching the sunset. Jaylen said he thinks and we confirmed he KNOWS he has a crush. We just don't know who it is because he won't say it. He says he doesn't think the guy feels that way about him. Other than that we know nothing.

We get back to the apartment still talking as we knock on the door. And Cinco opens it letting us all in. When we get back to the living room everybody is yelling and there's dice and money on the coffee table.

The three of us sit on the longer couch as we all sat next to each other. For a quick second it looked like Melvin had looked at Jay with a worried face but when Tj started tapping him he looked away. Hmmm? Maybe he's just concerned? Jaylens eyes look a little red and glossy. But since when have they been close?? Oh. My. God. You're fucking lying.

Well Well Well, Melvin is in the same fruit basket as Jaylen?? Hmmm? I will mind the business that pays me baby, when they say it then I can say something but until then I'll keep it a secret.

I get up going to the kitchen for a drink and see Alyssa standing against one of the counters rubbing her belly and eating grapes.

"May may!! Hi girl how are you??? Are you okay??" Alyssa says wobbling over to me. I hug her gently. And grab my phone typing, "As good as I can be. I lost my voice so I can't speak long sentences, it's only temporary i'm getting better as we speak. Thank you for being so worried about me. How are you and the baby?"

"Aww i'm sorry to hear that honey. You're such a strong women Mayari and if you need anything i'm here for you, always. Me and this brat are doing fine, he just like his damn daddy already always moving around and shit. I can barely sleep."

I smile and reach out my hand, hesitating at first but Alyssa nods letting me touch her belly. She's so round and big. The baby finna be tall just like Tj.

"Ouuu perfect since you back now. Yall good Mayari?" Tj asks coming into the kitchen where we had been talking. I nod my head giving him a thumbs up and he smiles.

I didn't even notice that there's a thing behind Tj this whole time, all in his phone as per usual.

Tj clears his throat all loud and put the tips of his fingers together. Yes, this the man that's gonna be a father soon, at least the baby gone be loved it might be a lil cuckoo like Tj though. Poor Alyssa, i'll start praying now.

"So we wanted to ask yall. Big bro, lil sis, would y'all, Messiah and Mayari do us the honors of being the god father and god mother of our son?" I start smile, clapping, hopping around and nodding my head all in one. I whisper out a little "Of course" and give them both hugs.

"Yeah bro you know I got you." Messiah puts his arm around my shoulder, "We finna be the best god parents, right Yari." I push his arm from around my shoulder, and walk away back to the living room.

I'm not gonna pretend to be happy and okay with the way Messiah is treating me. If he can treat me the way he does I can do the same. And it's time to move on to someone new.

To Be Continued...

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Enjoy my loves!!