Lost in Hollywood

Grief Group

Sky pushed open the doors of the auditorium, her heartbeat ticking in her throat like a trapped bird.

She tried to swallow down that bird, but it was stuck. Stupid, so fucking stupid— she'd been going to therapy for years, had attended all kinds of group sessions in the rehab, had gone to AA teens and all, and never had any problem with that, and yet—

It was different with your classmates. These were people she knew. Would she really want to show them her deepest, rawest scars? Would they keep quiet about stuff they learned here, or would it all come back to bite her in the ass?

Well, too fucking late to be getting second thoughts now.

Tom, who was sitting in a circle of chairs with half a dozen other kids, had already noticed her hovering by the doors and raised a hand in a greeting, making everyone turn and look, including the man who must have been the new counselor.

"Welcome!" The councelor called with a friendly smile. "Here for the grief group? You've come to the right place. Come, have a seat. We were just about to get started."

Sky gripped the straps of her backpack a bit tighter and walked down the stairs to join the group. She knew most of the kids present by sight, but almost none of them well enough to know their names. Except for Tom, none of Cody's close friends were there, but Sky recognized a couple of girls who'd been in the drama club with him. She'd seen those girls in the group that hung in front of Cody's locker almost daily, leaving new cards or pictures on the door, and she had no doubt they'd report back to Jess about everything that Sky said or did here. Her heart sank. Fucking awesome. Maybe I should just go—

But Tom was gesturing to an empty seat next to him, and Sky drew her eyes off those girls, forced herself to take the last steps, and slumped down in her seat. She let her backpack fall onto the floor next to her chair.

"You came," Tom said, leaning closer and offering her half a smile. "I already thought you weren't going to."

"Of course," Sky replied - even if her being here was far from of course. The uneasy rolling in her stomach was turning into nausea, and she tried to hide the nervous trembling of her hands by smoothing her black and white skirt over her thighs, trying to pull the hem closer to her bare knees. She felt exposed. She should have worn something else, jeans, sweatpants, one of Kat's old hoodies that felt like wearing a hug.

"Well, I'm glad you're here."

Sky gave up on her skirt and leaned closer to Tom, whispering so that the others wouldn't hear. "Look, I wanted to thank you. For whatever you said to Jess. The notes— I haven't gotten any since last week."

"Good," Tom replied. "If she starts that shit again, just let me know."

Sky gave him a small nod and was just about to ask him what he had in fact done to make Jess stop, but the counselor clapped his hands to get everyone's attention, and Sky swallowed the words. Later. They could talk about that some other time.

"Alright, let's get started then," the counselor said, glancing around the circle, meeting Sky's eyes briefly. He looked like he was a bit younger than Dad, maybe in his thirties, his hair was a wavy mess of chestnut brown curls and his smile seemed genuine enough. "We have a couple of new faces here, so let's start with a short introduction so that we can all get to know each other. I'm the new school counselor here at West Valley High, and even if the sign on my door says Mr. Willigan, I'd like for you all to just call me Paul."

Sky resisted the urge to roll her eyes but her lips pressed into a tight line. In her experience, the teachers who wanted the students to call them by their first name were the worst.