Revaluation that's been dancing in the rain

1. Once apon an afterlife

I run out after Julie, abandoning the music room behind me, as Mrs Harrison calls for me to return.
I know that skipping my performance won't end well, seeing as that's exactly what Julie is being kicked out of the program for,
but I honestly couldn't care less, my friend needs me
so that's where I'm going.
I finally catch up to her in the girls bathroom
"Jul's hey it's okay, we'll figure this out"
I try to soothe her
but the tears that have
pooled up in her eyes
threaten to spill over.
I've never been much good at comforting people, but for someone like Julie I still try,
pulling her into a hug,
I let her cry it out as
I caress her hair.
Flynn had yet to come find us, and I assume that she is covering for us with Mrs Harrison.
"Hey, let's go home, we can get Flynn to send us the homework"
I suggest wiping her face with a damp tissue
"My tía would kill me" Julie whispers
"No she won't" I reassure her "I'll say I'm sick, and you had to bring me home okay?"
She nods at my plan, and we go straight to the office to sign out.
They ring my house first, but when they don't get an answer they ring Ray, who gives permission for us to come home.
Not living that far away, we walk to Julies and text Flynn to let her know.
We walk into the house and sit on the couch, opting to watch a film, we finish Beauty and the Beast and are halfway through Cinderella when Ray comes home with Carlos.
"Hey girls, how you feeling Jessie?"
I turn to the voice and see Ray lugging camera equipment into the house.
Julie and I get up
to help as I respond
"Better now thanks Ray" I say taking the heaviest thing from him.

Julie's scraping something together in the kitchen before Ray and Carlos leave for Carlos's game.
I decided to join them since Julie wanted to try tackle the studio by herself.
Not having much of an appetite, I wander out to the garage and sit against the wall across from the door.
I have only been inside it once since Jul's mom Rose passed away, not wanting to overstep or upset Julie.
I had only gone in to take mine and Julie's stuff out that we had left in there a couple of days before her death.
I realise I must have been sitting out there for far longer than intended when Carlos comes out looking for me to leave.
I say goodbye to Julie, hoping she manages to get through some of her moms stuff
before getting in Ray's car and heading to the game.

Carlos had an amazing game, but when we return home we're met by a screaming Julie, saying that she had seen a ghost.
"I'll go check on her" I tell Ray, letting Carlos down from my shoulders where he was sat like a throne, heading up to her bedroom.
"Jul's" I call out before entering her room, "you good?"
"You don't believe me either, do you"
I lean against her closet door,
"Sure I do, come on I'll go out with you, and we can check it out together"
We make our way out, I hesitate at the door before following Julie in.
"You see anything, Jul's?" I ask, looking around the empty room, I'm not sure what she saw,
but I don't see any ghosts.
Standing out here I can't help looking around, *It has been too long* I decide running my hand along the wood of the stairs to the loft and begin making my way up.
"I know I saw something, I'm not crazy" I hear Julie mutter from below before screaming.
I run to the banister looking down at Julie facing the door with a terrified look plastering her face
"Jul's you okay?" I ask, looking down at her
"What's wrong?" I ask, making my way down to her when I get no response
"No, she can't" she says once I'm standing in front of her
I turn to look behind me before looking back at Julie.
"Okay hun how about we go inside and get something to eat and go to sleep, before you get all defensive it's not that I don't believe you I just think that it's been a long day and right now I you're seeing something that I can't, so why don't you go to sleep and we can talk about this again tomorrow" I suggest
"Yea, okay" she shakes her head and begins heading out the door to return to the house.
My phone starts to ring right as we make it out the door of the studio
"Hey Ronnie, what's up" I answer the call immediately
Julie looks at me expectedly as I talk on the phone
"Yeah Ronnie I'll be right over, yeah I'll grab it on my way. Bye" Veronica hangs up the phone and I look up at Julie apologetically
"I'm sorry Hun, I'll be back in the morning. Ring if you need me."
She smiles "It's okay I'll see you at school"

I run up to the bathroom to get dressed before heading out to my bike,
It had taken me months to be able to afford it, and now it's one of my most prized possessions.
I stop at the shop on my way to Veronicas, picking up all of her favourite comfort foods.
Parking the bike in the side ally next door to her house I hop the fence,
I've been doing this for the last year.
It started when Rose died.
I had been with Julie a lot less often,
she wanted her space
and I had given it to her.
In return, I had been staying out a lot more often, going to parties or just hanging out at parks.
I had met Ronnie at a party Carrie was throwing.
Dirty Candy had been performing as they usually did at Carries parties.
Sometimes I think that's the only reason she throws them.
She had been in the bathroom, the door was unlocked, so I thought it was empty.
The music was loud something up beat and pop playing, the house was massive, but it was still full, bumping into people and spilling drinks was inevitable.
I had stumbled my way upstairs to the bathroom and pushed open the door only to be meet with a girl crying on the floor leaned up against the bath.
I'm not good with emotions or comfort when sober, but a few drinks in I'm more comfortable trying.
"You look like you need a hug" I lean against the door frame
"Go away Carrie" the girl in front of my doesn't even look up
"Really" I say astonished, walking towards the girl
"Carries the type of person to leave her party to comfort someone"
She finally looks up "Carries a good friend" her words come out harsh and defensive
"Didn't mean to imply she wasn't"
"Didn't you"
"Yeah I guess I did, but I didn't mean to" I sit down on the edge of the bathtub next to her.
She moves away from me.
"I can leave if you'd like, I just wanted to check on you"
"What, you came all the way up here to check on me?"
"Well, no. Some jock asshole spilled his drink on my dress and I didn't want to go home smelling like cheap beer, comforting you would just be a bonus."
"My boyfriend" She says, not looking at me
"What about him" I ask scooting closer to her
"Carrie suggested playing spin the bottle, and it was all fun and games until Ricky landed on Bella, and they were only meant to kiss for 3 seconds, but they started making out in front of everybody"
She began crying,
a mix of her boyfriend basically cheating on her in front of everybody
and her being white girl wasted had her walls crumbling immediately
and had her balling her eyes out on my lap.
I slid down onto the ground and her head stayed on my lap, now lying on the ground.
I did my best to comfort her, rubbing her arm and silently soothing her breaking heart.

I use my normal route to get into her room,
climbing up the old tree that had a branch strong enough to hold my weight right outside her window.
I enter her room through her window, finding her the same way I had that night,
sitting on the floor at the foot of her bed, crying over her boyfriend, Ricky.
This was a regular occurrence,
her boyfriend was less than faithful and time after time
Ronnie would find herself heart broken over him.
The night went as it normally does crying, drinking, binge-eating, watching bad romcoms and once in a drunken heartbroken stupor, overcoming with
an unnatural confidence
Veronica kissed Jessie.

Veronica kissed Jessie,
and as much as Jessie wanted to,
as much as she had wanted to every other time this had happened,
Jessie did not kiss her back.