Canvas of Love | TxS

11 - maddy's realization

- Maddy -

The sound of the bell had my head shoot up from the desk, glancing around to see as everyone was packing up so i immediately gathered my things.

"Mads." I heard the faint voice of Ayden, seeing as he was already standing by my desk. "Got water? My mouth is dry as fuck."

"I want some myself. We have lunch now so let's just buy a bottle at the cafeteria." I said and stood up, watching as Ayden already began walking to the door however i locked my eyes on Ms Hale, seeing as she's already grabbing a pile of papers, not even taking a breather after her class.

"Mads!" My friend yelled out and i forced myself forward, leaving the classroom with him. "You know, i'm surprised that she didn't scold us. Specifically you, Maddy, you were literally sleeping." I heard him comment as we stepped into the cafeteria.

"She seems occupied enough today so maybe that's why." I responded and grabbed a tray. "I don't know. She's obviously not strict but Ms Hale has made the rules of her class clear."

"We went too far yesterday night. I'm barely functioning right now." I switched the topic, patiently waiting in line for the lunch. "I barely remember shit on what happened. Today is just a misery of feeling nauseous."

"Can we cut in front of you?" The, oh so familiar, voice traveled towards us. Linda already brushing in front of Ayden as Lia stood just next to her. "Wow. You two look rough."

"And you don't feel like shit? Well, never mind. The amount of times you two party, i'm sure you have gotten used to it." I spoke out.

"Exactly." Lia answered with a smile, stepping over to my side. "But last night was still fun, wasn't it? Seems like i finally got you to the point of letting loose completely." I felt as her finger tugged on my thin necklace.

"Really? What are you referring to?" I acted dumb even though i was in full knowledge of most of the things that went down. "Well," the girl stepped closer, "i'm referring to the kiss. Really was that drunk to not remember such a moment?"

"We kissed?" I kept my acting going.

"Oh, Maddy, i have to invite you to more parties! You'll get more comfort on drinking and will finally get used to having the slightest memory of what exactly goes down." The girl rolled out a laugh.

"I guess you're right." I responded and pulled my eyes towards the food options, finally able to drop my forced smile since she wasn't looking.

- - -
"Can i come in?" I asked after cracking the door open. "Maddy? Sure! Come on in." Ms Hale exclaimed and i carefully pushed the door closed with my foot, bringing the two styrofoam containers over.

"What's that?"

"Your lunch." I smiled, setting one of them in front of her.

"Lunch? I can't recall ordering anything nor asking a student to bring it over to me." The woman said but clearly excited about this sudden action of mine.

"I saw that you weren't planning to go so i felt responsible of you." I brought a chair right in front of her desk, taking a seat to eat myself.

"Oh? Was that a reference to what i said to you yesterday?"

"Maybe." I held my genuine smile. "Well thank you, Maddy. I do have to admit, got a pile of tests to grade so knew that i wouldn't have time to stand in line to get any food."

"Then dig in." I replied and handed a set of utensils over to her. "But i can tell that you got something under your skin so speak up." She began before taking the first bite.

"Wanted to thank you also apologize. Okay, can't remember every detail of what happened but the fact that you got up in the middle of the night to get me is a gesture that i won't forget."

"Right! So didn't wake up your parents? Refused me on helping you to your bedroom so made it to it safely?"

"Surprisingly yes. I think i had fell at some point as i saw a bruise on my arm this morning but neither of them questioned anything about a loud noise so i'm clean." I proudly explained and took another bite.

"Wait, is it something serious? Can i see?" Her tone immediately switched to concern but i only rolled out a chuckle. "It's okay! Only a small purple spot. Clearly bumped into something or actually had fell down."

"Well if you say so. But listen, i can't not give you this," Lauren pulled her wallet out of her purse, "for the food. I know the school only covers one portion and getting a second has you pay for it." I watched her set the cash down.

"No! Put it back! This is my thank you for last night so i'm not taking money from you." I picked it up and handed it right back. "Okay. Well now you're gonna make me feel like i own something back so how about i invite you over after school? You got me lunch and i'll make you dinner. Deal?"

"Deal." I answered without hesitation, trying to hide my wide smile by looking down and taking a spoonful of the food.

I still can't believe how badly i messed up when she took me home last night. The main event that out-glows them all is the fact that i confessed about finding her beautiful..

I mean it's not a lie. Nowhere close to it. Even now, as i'm looking at her eating, everything is just perfect about her.

At this point i think i've gotten myself stuck somewhere. I know i feel this motherly figure from her, i find that comforting. My own mother is of course a great parent but as i compare them both, Lauren makes me feel a different type of comfort.

What is going on with me? I literally just ditched my friends to come here, spend time with my teacher instead.

Right now i'm staring at her like a creep too but i can't help it. When she's looking back, she makes me feel needy to impress her, show off anything that she adores which most of the time is the art that i purposely put effort into mids class.

I never in my life have i enjoyed admiration about my hobby either. All my friends just keep repeating the same thing over and over but when Lauren says something similar to it, it holds a completely different effect on me. I can tell she's being truthful, has knowledge of what she's expressing.

"Done staring?" Her voice came at me but i didn't have shame anymore to look away like i always do. "Is it weird to you that you're so close to a student?"

"Not even a little bit. I had many students back at my old workplace that were attached to me regarding the tense interest towards art."

"So i'm also some student that is attached to you? Is that what you're describing me as?" I know i felt slightly offended but kept my smile visible.

"No, Maddy. That's not what i meant. You're different. Maybe it's the sake of us also being neighbors and having this connection outside of school but i can tell we share other similar passions despite art. That's what makes you stand out from the rest and i like that about you."

As those words left her mouth, i completely froze, silence taking over the moment. Why is my heart racing right now? It can't be that i was so unaware of forcing obvious feelings away until now. Do i seriously feel something more than just admiration about her?

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