❝ 𝐑𝐀𝐕𝐄𝐍 ❞ | kaz brekker

²¹ perhaps home is a person, not a place

❝ 𝐑𝐀𝐕𝐄𝐍 ❞

perhaps home is a person, not a place

"Paedyn!" 

Inej's voice pulled Paedyn from the cold depths of her own water, her sisterly figure, her friend's arms encasing her in a hearth of warmth.

The view of her dead parents, herself and her sister, their storm, Kirigan, they all vanished when the darkness took her again. It wasn't cold and threatening this time. When her eyes opened again, Paedyn understood why.

Inej was hovering over her, fear in her eyes. Paedyn's brows furrowed in confusion. What was there to be afraid of? 

Paedyn breathed in, almost choking on whatever it was in her mouth. Everything hit her suddenly. Inej's hand was covering her mouth tightly, her voice ringing in her ears, eat it, please eat it, the cold floor underneath her head, her entire body. 

She forced herself to chew and swallow, finally taking a deep breath and easing the pain in her lungs when Inej climbed off her.

Not safe. Not safe. Not safe. Not safe. Not safe. Not safe.

We need to go. We need to go. We need to go. We need to go. We need to go. We need to go.

Dead. Dead. Dead. Dead. Dead. Dead.

Evangeline's words rang through Paedyn's head like a drum as she forced herself to sit up. The antechamber, she was still in the antechamber. The one where the red gas infiltrated her lungs, not the field near the Fold were many Grisha lay dead.

Inej shoved a butterfly into her hands. "Give it to Kaz, make him eat it."

Paedyn gagged, looking at the small bug in her hands. "Saints, tell me I didn't just eat that."

"Wish I could. It saved your life, thanks to Wylan," Inej replied as the girls moved to Jesper and Kaz.

Paedyn cursed herself for not wearing her gloves and silently prayed that Kaz wouldn't hate her for this.

As his eyes moved underneath his eyelids, she carefully pried open his mouth. Tears, a sign of her weakness, fell from her eyes as she pushed the butterfly onto his tongue and closed his mouth.

No. Not a weakness, she realized as she looked at boy she had hopelessly fallen in love with. A strength. Loving Kaz, having feelings for him at all did not make her weak.

I am strong. She repeated it in her head as she brushed stray hairs off Kaz's forehead.

What did Inej do? How did Inej pull her out? 

Paedyn had heard Inej's voice, calling to her like a whisper or a dream.

"Kaz!" She cried out, shaking his shoulders. "Kaz, please wake up!"

Slowly, but surely, his eyes opened. Dark, like the shadows, but Paedyn could've sworn she saw a twinkle of light. He mumbled her name, before his eyes widened and he shoved her off of him, jumping back to his feet.