Butterfly Wings

What Now?

Day 2

After he left the day before, I was left in silence for a couple hours until the house above filled with voices, voices reminding me of my own happy family. Now I listen and envy the noises above, laughter, shouts and cheers, chatter amongst a happy family, I hear the sound of dishes being passed around and I realize they are eating dinner. I feel my own stomach rumble with hunger but pushed it aside, I listen to them for hours, I cried myself to sleep after a while, I can only imagine that my quiet sobs shook my entire body like a naked baby after a bath, the cold air hits, and the infant shakes with emotions of anger.

I just remember sobs filling me and then the exhaustion hitting like a wrecking ball, then I was waking up through the night to a silent black void. It hurt listening to the silence, hearing my own thoughts and the silent creaks of the wind outside. The sounds of silence gave me the chance to hear my wrecked breath as my sore throat heals from the harsh coughs that shook it. I would fall asleep just to wake again, exhaustion consuming my entirety every time I awoke from the troubled somber of nightmare filled dreams.

The morning came very slowly as light from above filled in through the cracks of wooden floorboards, the sounds of voices slowly becoming louder, waking up more as sleep left them, and soon the void was once again filled to the brim with sounds of breakfast being served to the hungry monsters above. The children's laughter filling my thoughts as I begin to think of how such a happy family came to be cold hearted monsters, just thinking about it, I cannot find any sympathy as I think of how they would react to something happening to their own children, and realization fills me as I think that whatever it is would be ten times worse for anyone who hurt them, if they are truly capable of doing such horrid acts right under their children's bare feet.

My thoughts run like a washing machine for a couple hours after breakfast is served, I am left in silence as they all make their way outside to enjoy what I assume is a nice sunny winter day. I close my eyes to imagine what it must look like outside of my family home, piles of melting snow still sitting in the damp yard, icicles hanging from the porch dripping under the sun's heat, beautiful blue clear skies above the quiet neighborhood, the houses surrounded by a forest of tall green trees. I imagine myself standing in the yard with my siblings as they run around in big coats under the cold breeze of air that sweeps under us, big smiles as the muddy dirt splashes under the running feet of children playing tag.

I can hear the laughter and shouts of happiness, as if it was actually surrounding me at this moment, a feeling of peace overcomes me. I can turn and look to the big window in the front of my house overlooking the front yard to see my smiling parents sitting in the living room watching, my father sitting in his special chair with a cup of hot chocolate in one hand and a game controller in the other, while my mother sits on the small sitting bench under the window laptop open as she works on her business, she occasionally glances toward us and laughs at the young muddy children as they slip and slide through the yard like kids in summer.

I can feel the emotions filling me up to the brim as the scene changes around me, teddy bears and flowers fill the yard with my family sitting inside the lit living room mourning in each other's arms, the night sky full of dark clouds as a light rain surrounds the house. A poster sticking in the yard with my face on it under the words written at top reading "Have you seen me?" A cop car sitting in the driveway as I look back to my mourning family, I watch the cop exit the house, the door letting the sounds of the grieving family escape from inside. The cop halts in front of me and looks to his partner, he speaks in a soft tone filled with guilt

"If only this had ended differently, I wish the news would have been better." The deputy says with sorrow in his voice.

"How did they take it?" his partner asks.