Shadow and Light

23

The Shadow

The note hadn't affected me, but it had created a curiosity deep inside me, someone out there knew who my absent father was. They knew who was the bastard that left my mother like that, all alone?

I had told Ranvijay to search for the archer, or whoever it was, but I knew the process would be slowed because even though the order would be direct from the king, it would still require a lot of paper work and intervention from different department.

Even though I liked how organised the system was, I didn't want everyone to find out about this.

So eventually I told Ranvijay to leave the task to me, he had heaved a sigh of relief, I had expected that.

But that decision took me to where I was right now, wrapped in a blanket, deep in darkness, an oil lamp in hand, waiting for my partner.

I hear a rustle, then I see a head and then I saw him, "Finally! I thought you were dead" I said, "Don't say that, of course I would come" he replied, "How are you brother?" I asked, a smile on my face, "I am fine, how have you been? How is being queen treating you?" he was being playful,  he was like that, this was that one man I couldn't really hate.

I had seen him through the worst and so had he.

"I am as okay as I can be Savar, how is Bhabhi?" I asked, "She is fine, the kids are fine, but enough chit chat, why did you call me?" he asked, his impatience evident.

This meeting here, right beside the fort, was dangerous, he couldn't die, he had a family.

"I want you to find someone, all I have for that is this" I handed him the note, he examined it, "This type of clothe is more prominent on the eastern borders" he told me, "Why does this say...this?" he enquired, "I don't have time to explain, Find out where the person who gave this to me possibly can be from, as soon as possible, I need it Bhai please" I told him, touching his hand, he patted my head and said, "Whatever my sister says" he smiled and left.

In that moment I realised I had forgotten about him, my brother, we didn't share the same mother but we shared the same childhood.

I never tied Rakhi on his hand, but he was always there.

I was wrong when I said I didn't have a brother, because I hadn't realised, I had one all along.

Tears formed in my eyes, I had ignored him, forgotten about him, but whenever I needed him, he was there.

I didn't deserve him, I was wrong.

And I hated it.

I hated me.

***

I had sneaked back in the palace, using my queen card in half of the places, when I came back in my new room, it was just like I had left it, dark, motionless and soulless.

Ranvijay was in a meeting, or with another woman, I had not cared enough to ask.

I took the blanket off my shoulders and cleaned my face with water.

I looked up in the mirror and I was scared shitless, but I suppressed the scream, I was used to this.

"What?" I asked, "Where did you go little killer?" that nickname again, it drove me mad.

"Nowhere, I was in the palace" I lied, but regretted it the moment I said it, as a dagger moved past my ear on the mirror shattering it in the process.

"Where were you?" he asked, his teeth clenched, his jaw tight, his hands a fist.

All I could see was the white of his eyes.