Last Hope {a paramore fanfiction}

Chapter Thirty Eight

Taylor's POV

17th March

"So, basically enjoy what's left of this month, we are seriously going to be none stop from then on. We have our first couple of European dates in April and May, then back for the Spring Tour in North America, then back to Europe for the festivals, over to South America for a bit, a tiny rest and then the self-titled tour, which means back to Europe and then around the states," our logistics coordinator said.

We all exhaled a deep breath. "Woah," Hayley said. "That's a lot," Jeremy joined in, looking somewhat more worried than shocked like myself and Hayley were.

"It'll be fun though!" I said, trying to lighten the atmosphere. My phone then buzzed and I saw a message show up across the screen.

B-Dawg
Got 'that' call :( and stupidly, started to look at old Please Clarify pictures :((( feeling like utter crap

Another message came up as I finished reading the first one.

B-Dawg
Just want to be with you now

My heart sunk again, at the realisation that not only was it hard starting a new relationship, but it was hard with that said relationship starting just as our album cycle did.

After another 10 minutes of discussions and talks over flights and bringing people on tour with us, in which I remained silent, we could go. I grabbed my jacket and bolted out the building to my car and drove over to Bethan's as fast as I could, but not before stopping off at a Walmart.

I buzzed for Bethan's apartment. "Who is it?" she said, in a slightly manic tone. "Taylor, duh," I said, laughing. "Oh right, haha," she laughed nervously. The gate opened and I walked to the building. I had no clue why Bethan must have sounded so odd and panicked, until I reached the second flight of stairs. How could I have been such an idiot? Of course Bethan was going to be this way. She hadn't mentioned Sam or had him mentioned to her for ages now and suddenly he was back in her life in a prominent way. I didn't want to imagine what the stress of the trial was going to be like for her, let alone face the possibility that I might not be there for her when it happens.

Before I knew it, I had reached her door. I knocked twice, before she opened the door. I took a moment just to look at her. Her hair was pulled back into ponytail, a few strands falling down the sides of her face, framing it perfectly. Her nose has a slight spray of freckles across it, her blue eyes staring right at me. She was wearing a navy sweatshirt, slightly too big for her, so that I saw a glimpse of her collar bones and shoulders, with her favourite black jeans. I let out a deep sigh. "What?" she said, her eyebrows knitting in the middle of her perfect face. "I'm just so happy to be here right now." She smiled and wrapped her arms around my neck and before I knew it she was kissing me softly. I leaned into her kiss, but she pulled away. It felt like she always pulled away too soon, but it also felt like could never stop kissing her if she'd let me.

I trailed in behind her, and took off my jacket to hang up and she walked over to her sofa. "What's in the bag?" she said, sitting down, and bringing up her legs, tucking her knees underneath her chin, and looking up at me. "Well, I don't know much, but I do know whenever someone's sad, they usually get cheered up by this." I pulled out the small tub of vanilla ice cream with chocolate chip. Bethan clapped her hands and laughed. "Yes! Go grab to spoons from the kitchen and let's get this pity party started." "This is hardly a pity party," I called out as I walked to the kitchen. "You're feeling shit and for good reason. We're not wallowing. We're just trying to feel better."

I placed the two spoons on the coffee table and plonked down next to her. "Thanks," she said and half smiled. I looked at her and pouted, before wrapping my arm around her and pulling her into me. She laughed and fell into my lap. "See, I like when you laugh," I said and began to tickle her sides. "Oh god no!" she screeched, her laugh now practically falling out her mouth in reels. "Now that's what I want to hear!" I shouted slightly, continuing my tickling assault. Then the most holy noise happened. 

I paused. "Did you just....snort?" I said carefully. "Nahnahnooo," she said, quickly followed by another, her face red. It was me who now couldn't stop laughing. "Oh my goodness," I said rolling back on the sofa, screeching. "Shut up Taylor!" she half whined half laughed, her hand around my forearm shaking me. "I can't-I can't," I said in between laughs. I then felt myself being grabbed and pulled off the sofa and onto the floor. Bethan rolled over on top of me, shaking from the vibrations that my continuous laughing gave out.

We laid there laughing, as the noise slowly died down. She looked down at me, her ponytail brushing the tip of my nose, making me giggle once more. Her face became very serious for a second. "What's wrong?" I asked. She leant down, her hand holding the side of my face. She rubbed her thumb slightly, tracing the skin under my eyes. It was at this moment she leaned forward and kissed me. Her pouted lips against mine sent electricity through me. I felt her other hand hold my face. My hand began to rub her arms, slowly moving down to her wrists. She broke away and looked at me again. She smiled. I smiled. Inside I was screaming with joy, so I just left it with a smile.

"I didn't know you were this big of a Tom Hanks fan," I laughed, as she showed me her full collection of his movies. "How could you not be?" she replied. "Touché," I said and laughed again. I found myself continually laughing and smiling ever since I had kissed Bethan. Ever since she came back into my life really. "I'd put on Forest Gump but I'm sick of crying so let's watch Big."

After she sorted out the player, she hopped back on the sofa into a small ball, curling up next to me. "Hi there," I said and she looked up at me, poking her tongue out, before snuggling deeper into me.

I couldn't tell her we were leaving so soon. I mean, I couldn't breath when I was with her because of how happy I was. But I didn't know if I'd be able to breath without her.