Book 2: Beginning Again -Carlos Sainz

Chapter 6

The rest of the Dutch grand prix has gone by in a blink of an eye. Marie found herself in Italy, once again. She hadn't thought much about that day last week, opting to give herself the hour to cry and then get back to work harder than before. She put together a full instagram proposal for her father, choosing to back herself. Confidence was something she didn't often feel comfortable with, but she had learned how to fake it.

She had a well thought out proposal, including all the different ways she could get the Tifosi engaged with the team. All of the Ferrari staff were giving her encouraging smiles and nods during her speech, which boosted her confidence immediately.

"Marie, I quite like this idea. It brings in a personal touch with the fans... I say we launch your Instagram stories next week and then we will repost it to ours," Julie, the social media admin for Ferrari said. She smiled up at Marie, giving her a confident thumbs up.

"That sounds wonderful. Dad? Any thoughts?"

"Can't wait," Gavin replied, still looking at the handout she had issued to them all.

"Great!" Marie said, clapping her hands. "Then we should probably all head to dinner before we are late."

The group all stood up and exited the room, traveling the short distance to the hotel ballroom for the team dinner. Everyone was already dressed, and Marie chose a mid length navy blue dress with her favorite vintage Chanel purse and some Jimmy Choo heels. She secretly loved fashion, something she didn't talk about as much because Chad had told her, repeatedly, that it was boring. Marie walked into the ballroom, seeing all the eyes in the room jump to the group that just walked in. She told herself it was because they were all fashionably late, but in reality everyone was looking at her. She blushed under the eyes that were on her and made a quick beeline to the bar.

**

"Woah," Charles said as he took the word straight out of Carlos' thoughts. "Marie looks really good."

"Oh," Carlos said, feeling a pang of... some emotion. "Are you... into her?" He tried as much as he could to sound nonchalant but for some reason he was dying to know his answer.

"Oh no, mate. I was simply just stating the obvious. I told you before, not my type."

Carlos nodded at Charles' statement, still keeping his eyes on her. It was stating the obvious to say that she looked really good, but Carlos probably would've used the words 'crazy fucking sexy' instead. The way that her dress fit her, the way she walked so elegantly in her heels like she was floating, and the way her hair was pinned up made Carlos unable to think about anything else. He felt some random urge to unpin her hair and let it fall all over her exposed back.

"Are you... okay?" Charles asked, waving a hand over Carlos' face. The fingers in his vision brought him back to the guy in front of him.

"Oh, yeah. I'm fine," he said, sipping his drink. Charles looked back to where he was staring, drawing the conclusion to himself.

"So do you really hate her or is this just a... sexual tension thing?" Charles asked, waggling his eyebrows.

"Funny, Charles," Carlos replied, not wanting to answer the question. If he had been asked that 10 minutes ago it would've been a definite 'hate her' answer. But now, something was different. Everyone was hushed by the ringing of the dinner bell and the announcement for them to take their seats. People milled around the table, looking at the small place cards on each plate. Carlos usually sat next to Charles, but he was surprised when he still couldn't find his name as he continued to walk down the long table. He smelled her perfume before he even looked up to see who was standing square in front of him.

"Hello," she spoke, giving him a small smile.

"Hi," he replied, taking his seat.

"Of all the people at this dinner, I'm sat next to her. Of fucking course, the one person that I wanted to avoid tonight." he thought to himself, looking around to see who else was next to them that he could converse with during this long dinner. Her voice brought him out of his head.

"Carlos," she said quietly, only for him to hear. He turned his head to her in response, surprised at how different her facial expression was. "I... just wanted to apologize for being rude a few days ago, I was having a tough day. I haven't been fair to you and I wanted to apologize. That's all," she said, trailing the end of her words. She avoided eye contact, fumbling with her napkin in her lap. Carlos watched her, seeing how uncomfortable she was.

"I actually wanted to apologize too," he replied. There was a momentary pause where he didn't know what to say, or rather how to say it. "I saw you later that day... uhm... when you left the building to go back to the hotel. And I never wanted to make you cry, I would never want to see you upset..." They both avoided each other's eye contact making it look like a very weird conversation between two people who wouldn't look at each other. Marie rearranged her silverware while Carlos folded and refolded his napkin.

"Oh, that wasn't... about you. That was... something else." Marie cringed at the knowledge that he had seen her crying. She was taught never to show weakness, never be vulnerable.

"Are you... okay now?" He replied with a touch of concern.

"Hmmm... ask me tomorrow," she said with a small laugh.

He gave a small laugh too before replying, "you know, Marie, I actually meant what I said when I said I'm here if you need anything. This job, this life, it's not easy. I can be a friend to you... if you want that. If not, that's fine, we can just go back to ignoring each other."

"Yeah, friends would be nice. I seem to have a hard time letting go of the past but for the record, I do forgive you for how we first met. But as for this job, I just can't stop feeling like I'm constantly messing up."

They looked at each other now, and Marie couldn't help but feel captivated by his gorgeous eyes. They were very disarming, which is why she suddenly started to open up to him even when her brain was screaming at her not to.

"Hey, for the record, everyone here likes you. Except me," he said with a wide smile.

She threw her head back in laughter at his comment.

Carlos felt a warm feeling through his whole body at the sight and sound of her laugh. She had such a great smile and Carlos felt as if he would do or say anything to see it again. It was like a small dopamine rush every time she smiled at him, as if he had finally gotten his reward. He was shocked when she apologized to him and even though his instincts told him to keep her away, he couldn't help but apologize too. She seemed so different this day, like she had opened up just a sliver more and he was able to see past her hard exterior to the woman that lied underneath. His brain caught wind of the feelings he wasn't able to control, leaving him wondering what the hell was going on with him. He quickly made conversation with the guy to his right, even though he stole glances at her from his peripheral vision the whole night. Her perfume never left the air and Carlos had to refocus his mind every time he took a deep breath in.