Book 2: Beginning Again -Carlos Sainz

Chapter 35

Marie didn't bother hiding her confusion as she read the email about the emergency meeting across all Ferrari social media and social-related teams. This type of thing didn't happen often, but sometimes it was just a massive overcorrection. One time, this meeting was called because #Charlos was trending on twitter and the head for Ferrari social media was genuinely concerned that the fans thought they were dating. It was hard for Marie to explain the whole thing without breaking out into laughter, and made sure she gave Carlos and Charles the full rundown of the panic meeting. Marie had 30 minutes to kill before the meeting so she went out to grab some lunch. It was a warm but cloudy day in London, the type where Marie spent the entire time outdoors trying not to get sweat stains on her business casual attire. She grabbed a sandwich and walked back, taking in the views of the city she rarely ever got a chance to appreciate. She watched as a tourist couple took photos of each other in front of some building, smiling at how cute they were. Before she knew what she was doing, she approached the couple and asked if they wanted their photo taken together. They enthusiastically said yes, quickly scrunching together so that their bodies were more touching than not. Marie couldn't hide her smile as she watched them kiss briefly, making sure to snap a quick pic of that too. The couple thanked her graciously as she continued on her walk back to the office.

"Okay so maybe I don't hate love," she thought. "Maybe sometimes it is worth the risk and it all works out and you live the happy ever after."

Marie glanced down to her phone, clicking it open to see the lock screen photo she had changed to one of her and Erin. She could still see the previous lock screen photo burned into her brain. How they did the same thing as that couple on the beach, scrunching together for a photo, so close that you'd think they were one entity. By the time she got back to the office, she was jogging to her computer to log onto the call in time.

"Hi all," the head of Ferrari's public and social relations said with a stern tone as people filed into the call. Marie felt a rush of anxiety, as she knew that something bad must be happening for the boss to be on this call.

"As some of you may have seen, we have a bit of a situation going on with the press. Not just one, but both of our drivers have been photographed in... precarious situations," the boss said, followed by a sigh as she pressed her fingers to her temples. "This is definitely an all-hands-on-deck situation, as right now it looks like we are paying millions to two playboy men who are entertaining a list of women. Needless to say, it's absolutely horrible for our brand. Which is why I asked all of you to be here today, as we need to roll out a counter-attack and change the narrative from all of our social outlets. I need the fans to remember why they love Charles and Carlos. I need family content, I need friends talking about how great they are, I need wholesome. I need family-friendly. I need fucking PG-13 or I swear to god..." she said as her frustration peeked through her voice. She cleared her throat and took a breath before speaking again. "So, who has what?"
Marie felt like all the blood drained out of her body. Everything went cold as she stared at the screen. She felt like her brain hadn't even told her fingers to select another tab and type his name into google. She felt like it took every single muscle in her body to type out his name as everything felt heavy. She was hit with a rush of adrenaline as the webpage loaded and she saw what everyone else apparently already had.

F1 STAR CARLOS SAINZ JR SEEN DANCING + MAKING OUT WITH MYSTERY WOMAN

EVERYONE'S FAVORITE SPANIARD WAS SEEN CANOODLING WITH A NEW WOMAN AT A CLUB IN MONACO. THE TWO MADE A QUICK EXIT TOO... SEEMS LIKE HIM AND MARIE ARE OFFICIALLY DONEZO!

Reading her own name in the tagline made her violently uncomfortable. She felt like every single set of eyes from everyone in the meeting was staring at her, waiting to see if she would break down and cry. She clicked back into the meeting, grabbing her notepad to jot down a few notes. She even unmuted herself to tell her boss that she would have her social outlets post some funny blooper reels from the driver videos. A few times she felt the tears welling in her eyes, but she blinked them away. He couldn't have this, he couldn't win this time. He had already taken so much of her focus away from her career, but this was one thing she wouldn't let him take. So she sat there, nodding along, with a neutral-yet-stoic look until the meeting ended. Marie sent out an email to her team, asking them to compile the blooper reel and make some other funny content. She knew she couldn't bear to look at his face for even one second after this. Marie quietly closed her laptop and packed up her things, deciding that she could work the small remainder of the day from home. Her whole commute was a blur until she closed the door to her apartment behind her. She pulled out her phone, repeating the actions from earlier today until the same headline stared back at her. She started to scroll as the tears came again, this time she let them fall. It wasn't a violent cry where she could barely get any air into her lungs. It wasn't a weeping, wheezing, snotting, messy, emotional cry. It was the cry of acceptance. Marie scrolled through blurry photos and shitty writing of speculation and what "eyewitnesses" saw. As soon as she reached the end, she closed her phone and sat down on the floor. She blinked slowly, even though her vision was blurred from tears. Her whole body seemingly sunk into the ground, and even breathing felt like it took time and energy. She felt empty, once again, that familiar feeling that had been nagging at her. But this time, it was followed by the acceptance that he could no longer do anything else to hurt her. He had already moved on, and Marie had not only heard about it, but she read the article and saw the photos. There was nothing more that he could do to her. She closed her eyes for a moment, tears still flowing as she thought,

"I knew this day would come, but I didn't think it would be so soon. But here it is. The next time it will be easier, and then even easier. The hardest part is over."

It took a good half an hour before Marie stood up, feeling her muscles ache. She finally took off her coat and shoes, putting her work stuff away before changing into an oversized sweatshirt and sweatpants. She mixed herself an at-home aperol spritz as she got out everything she needed to make mac n cheese. She turned on some channel on the television for background noise as she cooked, slowly taking her mind off everything. By her second aperol, Marie felt like she could breathe again. She ate her mac n cheese even though it was way too hot and laughed at the TV. Soon enough it was time for bed. She climbed into bed, thinking,

"It only gets better from here. The sun will rise tomorrow, and I will try again."

**

Sure enough, the next morning Marie's alarm went off and she hopped out of bed. She poured her coffee, adding in all of her little syrups and fancy creamers before she sat by the window to drink it. The events of the previous day were swirling in her mind, but it hurt a little less today. She took a couple extra minutes to pick out her favorite outfit, and put on a bit more makeup. As she stopped to look in the mirror before she left, she smiled and flipped her hair.

"His loss," she thought as she walked out of the apartment and into the warm summer air. This time, she actually meant it.