Adelaide Dove Hindley is a young woman with too many problems to bear. After an abusive episode with her boyfriend, she runs to the pier. She just wanted to escape her life and have some peace but when she finds herself about to jump she doesn't kno...
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It's been a month since I was discharged from the hospital. I've seen Albert once and Syd twice. Once she found out what happened she swore she would get him. I felt bad. She said she was a bad friend for not seeing it sooner.
But how could she? I didn't even know what was going on. The detectives say they are very close to finding him but I don't feel too confident about it.
I have barely slept. I have large eye bags that look like bruises. I've covered them up from Zane. He thinks I'm sleeping soundly every night. The longest I've slept in one sitting is four hours. But most of the time before it reaches four hours I wake in a hot sweat having the same re-occurring nightmare of being attacked in my apartment bathroom.
I still haven't gone back. Zane has bought me new clothes since it happened.
I feel so pathetic. I can't even step into the bathroom without wanting to cry. Taking a shower is the hardest part. With the water running it's hard to hear if people are close to me. And my eyes closed while washing my hair makes me panic. So now I've just started opening my eyes while washing. My eyes get red and dry every day.
I think I need therapy, but it would be hard opening up to a stranger. I've never been to therapy, but the thought of telling a stranger everything about me sounds terrifying. At this point, I'm just trying to get through each day without having a panic attack.
I feel like I need to tell Zane but I don't want to bother him. He has a lot going on right now. We haven't been talking too much because he's so busy. He leaves at 5:50 AM and comes back at 11 PM.
It's 11:20 AM right now and I need to get out of the house. I haven't left since I've gotten here. I want to see Albert.
I also want to get a new book. I've read all the ones I have.
I decide to face the scary outside world and get my lazy ass up to do something. I'm nervous I'm not going with Zane.
What if I see Will?
I get dressed in some leggings and a hoodie.
Zane's hoodie
It smells like him. He smells good. Calming. Like forest and pine.
I slip my Converse on and say bye to Uno with treats and some kisses. Zane told me to stop feeding him so much because he's getting fat. But he's just fluffy. I scolded him for body-shaming his son.
"Don't tell your daddy ok, Uno?" I ask him. He just looks at me with a piece of chicken hanging from his mustache. We have a special bond. He knows what I'm saying, trust me.
I get the rest of my stuff and head out. I walk through the neighborhood flinching as birds fly over me. It's a humbling experience. 3 months ago I wouldn't have thought twice if I saw a couple of birds. I probably would have tried to be Snow White and talk to them.
I eventually make it to Albert's unscathed. I walk through the door hearing the bell above me. "Welcome in," Albert says looking at a book not knowing it's me. I walk over to him quietly. "Adelaide you're not slick," He continues to look at the book. Confused, I sit there. "How'd you know it's me?" "You have a certain chaotic presence about you, I always know it's you," He says in broken English.
And I thought I was slick.
"How are you doing?" He asks with sad eyes finally looking up from his book. "I'm ok," I lie with sadness coming over me. "I think we both know that's not true." He steps around the counter and hugs me.
One thing about Albert is he never hugs people. Throughout my knowing him, I've only been hugged by him three times. The first was when I ran into his shop crying about how I was getting picked on in my foster home, the second I saw him after breaking my wrist thinking I was a skater girl at the age of 13, and the third was when I got my first period and I again ran to him crying. But this time I thought I was going to die.
This is now my fourth time in a full embrace with Albert. He's soft and squishy. He's also very comforting.
I told Albert everything that happened, my ex-relationship, Zane, where I'm living, etc. He was more freaked out when I told him I was living with a man than when I got beat in the bathroom. He gave me a lesson on sex ed like I was a teenager. He acts like I haven't lived with Will for a long time. I let him ramble, I think it gave him peace of mind.
I walk back home after hours of being with Albert. I eventually get there and I immediately get spooked with the sound of yelling. I open the door and slowly slip through.
"I don't know where the fuck she is! But you need to find her now!" He yells into the phone. As he hangs up he roughly grabs his hair ridden with stress. "Zane, are you ok," I ask quietly? "Who are you trying to find? I can help if you want," I offer.
He looks at me and his face drops. As Speed walks over to me I start to panic.
Did I say the wrong thing? Am I getting in trouble?
My eyes widen as I see his hands raised in front of me. I flinch back turning my head and getting ready for the stinging feeling I've known my entire life.
