The Missing Manuscript

Chapter 8: Q and A

Shlyndrea's POV

It's been a month since that happened. I can somehow say that I can now accept the truth, but there are still parts of me that don't want to accept it.

The one month that passed was like hell for me. I've been so affected by that; I barely leave my bed. It seems like I've lost interest in doing things. I didn't go to school, got tired of doing chores, tired of talking, socializing-everything. I got tired of everything.

A big thanks to Zyir who stayed by my side and didn't leave me. He also made an excuse letter for me; he's the one who signed it because I don't have a guardian here. Before he goes to school, he makes sure to cook food for me so I have something to eat when he leaves. After school, he'll cook dinner for us. He does the household chores. He's always checking on me.

How can't I love someone like him? He's so caring and genuine. He barely talks, but I can feel his care for me.

Arci and Chance also visit from time to time. And yes, they already know that Zyir and I live under one roof.

I'm so thankful that I have them on my side because honestly, I don't know what will happen to me if they're not here with me. Especially Zyir; he helps me a lot. He helps me with everything. He's totally my savior.

There is one time that he knock on my door. He murmured "I'm here" then he paused and after a few second he said "You can talk to me, or not, but I'm here."

Sa isang buwan na pagmumukmok ay madami akong narealize. That I shouldn't be wasting my time here in the four corner of my room doing nothing.

That's why I will continue my studies, and forget the past.

"Shy, wanna watch Netflix?" Yaya niya sa akin.

"Okay" tanging sagot ko.

"Then c'mon, we need popcorn and drinks for our movie marathon later" He said then drag me to get up on my bed.

Basta nalang nanghihigit, baka pwedeng magpalit muna ako ng damit no?

"Cgeh na, lumabas kana muna para makapag bihis na ako" kunwari'y tinatamad kung saad sa kanya.

Lumabas na rin agad siya kaya nagbihis na ako. I just wear comfortable clothes, sa tindahan lang naman kami pupunta.

Paglabas ko ng kwarto ko ay nandun siya, naka abang sa akin. Naka suot lang din siya ng black hoodie jacket, same pa kami ng color.

Bumili lang kami ng popcorn, softdrinks, at kung ano-ano pang sitsirya. Bumalik na rin agad kami sa bahay.

"Shy, how are you?" He asked out of nowhere. Where here in the living room, watching a movie.

"I'm good? I think I am" Saad ko habang ang atensyon ay nasa pinapanood pa'rin naming movie.

"If you where in that girl's situation, would you be mad at the boy?" he asked.

We are currently watching a movie about a zombie apocalypse. In the movie, the boy killed the girl's mother, who had turned into a zombie, in order to save his own mother. The girl got mad at the boy because he killed her mother, who she hadn't seen for a long time. However, in the end, the girl forgave the boy.

If I were that girl, would I do the same? Can I forgive that boy? Maybe yes? Maybe no?

"Yes, because if I were in that boy's position, I would do the same. I would choose to save my mother. And no, because the boy lied to the girl. He didn't immediately admit what he did and even lied to the girl." I answer with straight face.

"Hindi ka pa inaantok?" tanong niya ng matapos ang pinapanood naming movie.

"Yeah" tanging saad ko.

"What if we play a game?" Nakangiting saad niya.

"What kind of game?" kuryosong tanong ko.

"Question and Answer, I'll ask a question then you have to answer it, then you'll asked a question and I'll answer it, with explanation okay." Sounds good.

"Okay, Game."

"Okay, first question. In one sentence, what would you tell to your younger self?" Interesting, I thought he'll asked me silly questions.

"I'm sorry little Drea, sorry if I didn't keep my promise" mapait akong napangiti dahil dun.

"Okay, it's my turn to asked question." Saad ko at inayos ang aking pagkakaupo. "Never be able to be forgiven or Never be able to apologize?"

After hearing my question he remain silent, as if his lost in his own thoughts. "Never be able to be forgiven" he said bitterly.

Pain, sadness, and guilt is evident in his eyes. Why you're so affected with that question, Z?

"Uhm, why? Paliwanag mo yung sagot mo." Saad ko.

"I did a horrible thing, Shy. And that's unforgivable, that's why I'll choose never be able to be forgiven gather than never be able to apologize, because I really what to apologize to that person, I'm not hoping to be forgiven by that person. All I want to do is apologize, for the pain that I cause to her, and the pain that I will cause to her" paliwanag niya.

"Okay, you're next question is 'What is more important forgiveness or acceptance?" tanong niya sakin.

"For me, acceptance. You can forgive someone but it's hard to accept them again in your life. Maybe you forgive, but deep inside you can't still accept the thing that he/she did to you." I answered.

"Okay my turn to ask. Change something from the past or get a clue about your future?" I asked him, I know he'll answer get clue about the future, because he's not kind of person that will go back to the past he always say that 'Everything happens for a reason'.

"Get a clue about your future" I was shocked. I thought he'll choose the other one. "I told you didn't I, I did something horrible. And if I was given a chance to change that, I'll gladly will."

"What is something you consider absolutely unforgivable?" It's his time to asked me.

"Lying. I value trust, because of my trust issue. I barely give my trust to someone, but when I give trust, once it's broken it won't be fixed again. Just like what I always said. 'Trust is fragile, hard to repair, for once it's broken, it's hard to repair." I hate liars!

"When making decisions, do you usually follow your head or your heart? And why?" I asked.

He pause a few second and answer. "Before, I used to follow my brain. But now, I'm hurting because I hurt someone I value because of listening to my head. And now, I follow my heart. I want to follow my heart."

"Let's play other game, wala na akong maisip na tanong." Saad niya.

"Okay, how about never have I ever?" Maganda kaya yung laro na yun, tapos puro kabaliwan.

"Okay, I'll start. Never have I ever laugh loudly in the library and got scold by the librarian." Natatawang saad niya.

"I have! HAHAHAHAHA" I remember when Arci and I are in the library to find a reference for our report. Then Arci say something funny that cause us to laugh loudly and got scold by the librarian.

"I never" he said. Of course! Never pa talaga, he's so nonchalant sa classroom. He barely talk and show emotion, so how come he will laugh that loud in a library.

"My turn, Never have I ever sung in the shower like I was performing at a concert." I said and smirk. He did that,  I hear him once.

"I have" mahinang saad niya.

"What? 'Di ko narinig" pang aasar ko pa.

"I have" malakas na Saad niya. Kaya napahagalpak ako ng tawa. Yung nonchalant na si Zyir Flynn ay nagco-concert sa Cr. HAHAHAHAHHAA.

Pinalipas namin ang gabi na nagkukwentuhan at nagkukulitan kami. Sobrang saya ng gabing iyon, tila nakalimutan ko ang lahat ng inaalala ko habang kasama siya.

He really gives me comfort, and peace. Whenever I'm with him, I feel safe and secured.