Manzil ( kismat ka khel part -2) Completed

Shikayatein

" tumhe yahan nahi ana chahiye tha " Anirudh might have realized how he behaved with her just now and he left her shoulders , whispered in a cracked voice looking away from her . 

Bondita was angry at him and now his words were adding fuel to the fire . He thinks he can leave her so easily . he can give up on them so easily but he have to pay for things ..he have to come back with her . She grabbed his sleeve and made him turn with a jerk . 

" kya kaha aapne ? " she asked , her voice dark . " mujhe nahi aana chahiye ...mujhe nahi aana chahiye . " she grabbed his collar yet again and yanked him so that they were inches away from their faces . He looked into her eyes and the darkness ..the intensity he saw ...it reminded him of himself . He felt like he is almost seeing himself in front of her . " ek baat kaan aur dimaag kholke sun lijiye ...main yahan se aapko liye bagair nahi jaungi . main yahan iss halat mein iss liye nahi aayi hun kyunki mujhe aapke bina jana pade . agar aap mere saath nahi gaye ..to main bhi kahi nahi jaungi ... marr jaungi lek-" She couldn't speak further because Anirudh had covered her mouth before she could utter any other nonsense . 

" samajhti kya ho tum ? " he gritted out . " bolne ka haq diya hai to kuch bhi bologi . " He raised his voice a little . " tumhe ek kharoch tak na aaye iss liye main yahan inn logon ke paas qaid hun . " she looked at him with widened eyes . " tumhe kuch na ho iss liye main yahan dar dar ke thokre khaa raha hun , tum wahan chain ki saans loo iss liye main yahan apni saansein daba raha hun ...Bhoolo mat ki tumhi ne jidd ki thi main chala jaun " He barked out loudly leaving her broken . As soon as he left her Anirudh regretted his words ...he shouldn't have said that ...he shouldn't have ...blamed her . 

Bondita went numb ...her heart pierced , torn with his accusation . And he was right . He told her again and again that he don't want to leave her he don't want to go ...but she didn't listen to him . he begged her and she still didn't listen to him ..

" mera waisa matlab nahi tha " he muttered defeatedly but it was too late , she has turned away from him . 

" main jaanti hun aapka kaisa matlab tha ...and ..i-..i don't blame it on you . galti iss baar meri thi to saza main bhugat chuki hun ....par hamare bacchon ne koi galati nahi ki thi ..phir unhe saza kyunnn? aap ne mujhe saza dedi hai ...par mere bacchon ko ..m-mere ba-cchon ko saza mat dijiye ...m-ere saath chaliye please ...the-y they need you .." She started crying so badly that her hiccups started . Anirudh panicked seeing her hiccups and wandered around for the search of water . He found a one big pot of water under banyan tree and ran to fetch water . He made her sit on a stone and made her drink it . He soothed her back until the hiccup stopped . 

His soul cried seeing her tears . 

But he could do nothing about it . 

" tumhe lagta hai main tumhe saza de raha hun ...kya main khudko saza nahi dunga tumhe takleef de kar . kya mujhe takleef nahi hogi tumhe dukhi dekh kar ? kya main saza nahi bhugat raha hun tumse door rehkar ..ba-bacchon se door rehkar ? kya mujhe dard nahi hota hoga ...yeh jaankar ..k-ki t-tum duniya ki sa-sabse badi khushi mujhe dene j-jaa rahi ho aur main t-tumhaare paas nahi hun ...m-ere bacche ki pehli dhadkan main sun nahi paya , mere bacche ki pehli laat mehsus nahi kar pay- " he cried out . He couldn't help but imagine the milestones he had missed—the flutter of tiny kicks against Bondita's belly, the joy of hearing their heartbeat for the first time, the anticipation of counting down the days until their arrival. 

Bondita held his face close to her chest  , fingers running through his hair as he clutched her tighter to himself . His tears falling on her stomach . He brought one of his hands down on her stomach . Gently , caressing it to feel his baby . " m-main apne bac-bacche ko ..mehsus nahi kar paya Bondita ...m-mere sapne ko ..mehsus n-nahi kar paya ...n-nahi keh p-paya ki ..ki main kitna py-aar karta hun iss-isse "