Scarlet P.O.V.
There was a point in my life when I shut down my feelings. I didn't want to feel because feeling meant pain, feeling meant a whole lot of hurt. I didn't want to think because I would destroy myself inside out, and I didn't want to cry because I got sick of it all—the numbness and the confusion. I hated being stuck in my head and in my feelings, so I shut them down. I learned that I could, if I chose to. I could choose not feel.
But this was a very tricky thing, not healthy if you ask. I didn't care. If you were even close to the point of control as I am, you start switching. There are times you want to be in touch with your feelings, so you shut out the sadness, and the hate, and the pressure on your chest, the pain in your head, and the tears in your eyes, but you want to feel the happiness. And when you learn to master it, it's a false heaven. All you feel is happiness, and don't get me wrong, it's peaceful. Until you start questioning everything. Did I actually feel it if I could just as easily shut it? And then... there's this point where you can't shut it down, and things start crumbling. That's how I feel now.
It hit me like a ton of bricks, and I didn't see it coming. Orion is alive. He must be. If he left me a note, then he must have known. But it's been six years. Six FUCKING years. All because Mason took the note meant for me. All because I never visited here. But Orion is alive, he must be. And between all the sorrow and the anger, for the first time in years, I feel a new type of hopefulness in my heart. It stops my ongoing thoughts for a while. I smile as tears stream down my face. I don't know when I sat down or how I did it. All I know is Orion is alive. The dead body wasn't him. It wasn't him. I keep repeating it in my head and on my lips as if it would cease to be the truth, as if trying to imprint it in my memory. Suddenly, I hear myself laugh before I register I'm doing it, and then I laugh even harder because Orion is fucking alive. And then... I calm down, my thoughts racing again. I need to find him. And I'm six fucking years late. Mason is going to suffer. I don't care if he is one of us or not. Fuck. Him.
I let myself calm down for about two more seconds before I get back on my feet. I wipe away the tears and get ready to leave. I've lost six years. I can't waste any more time. I need to search Orion's database for 'unsuspicious cat' and 'wildness'; those could easily be code names. With that in mind, I check the cameras. No movement. Great. I leave to return to Orion's hideout.
first note -
'Where only legacy can find' - A second note, found it
'8+10=_, 24, 30 - repeat' - This almost looks like a math problem, not so appealing right now.
'look closer and you may find' - find what exactly.
'Legacy is in the blood' - Why the 'e'
'Legacy, Scars are thinker don't forget'. - This is about me, but than that might mean, the former sentence was indicating someone else. this is giving me a head ache.
Second note -
'when forgetfulness is forced upon, disappears the scars' - is it me or is he trying to say he forgot me?
'When help is -.- Forgotten -.- The unsuspicious cat remains' - Am I the cat or is there a traitor
'One wildness is all thats needed.' - confusing for so many reasons.
'my force is not easy to break, more is what you need' - arrogant much?
'(Legacy)' - the word marked as a whole, and 'e'. Where had I seen this initial before
YOU ARE READING
Scarlett & Ethan
ActionI've changed my identity three times. can never be to sure right. right now Im Riley Blake. a school teacher with short dark hair, with big innocent eyes. having managed to escape, I've lived a relevantly normal life for the past 6 years. by no mea...
