ODDS OF LOVE

Episode Thirty Two

            Faith Lane had just wanted coffee with Pamela. Just coffee. And coffee was what they had after she received the sweet haltingly sensitive text from the woman. But it was coffee at her own one bedroom apartment in Takoma Park. And they had never had that coffee. 

She rolled over in her double bed and found herself looking at the beautiful heart shaped sleeping  face of the woman whose delicate and gently shy kiss had made her forget everything from her brother in law's shooting to her ex's departure from her life to the fact that after Melinda  had left she had vowed to only do easy not complicated passionate moments with women. 

( " Come with me , " Melinda had said as she sat in the Hyattsville cafe , nursing her coffee , staring at Faith. )

( " I can't. I have a life here. " )

( " No. You have a life here that doesn't involve me , Faith Lane. You were never really in this relationship , you know.  It was fun. Lord it was fun but it was a rollercoaster ride with you. A ride I tired of because I want more. I need more. You claim you want more , that you want what your brother has. But you don't want it with me. Damn it you wouldn't let me leave make up or a toothbrush or anything at your place. Because you don't love me. Well , bitch , I am falling for you. I curse you to finally fall for the one person that breaks your heart the way you did mine. Goodbye , Faith Lane. " ) 

Faith sat up suddenly but very carefully so as not to wake up Pamela. She didn't know why but she wasn't quite ready for this woman to leave. Not just yet. 

( " Who the hell are you , Pamela ? , " she said with genuine curious interest and odd yearning right before her mouth suddenly latched upon the woman's soft and supple pink nipple breast like a desperately hungry baby in need of nourishment. She heard the woman moan with what sounded like so much delight and it was like music to her ears.  )

( " I'm nobody , " Pamela whimpered as her eyes drifted shut and her hands gripped Faith's shoulders tenderly. " Just a boring nurse...... " )

No. This woman wasn't boring. She was anything but. She was the woman that looked like anything but easy and non complicated. She looked like forever to her. This woman was destined to make her think of the things she claimed she wanted but was scared to reach for. Marriage. Kids. A dog. Picnics in the park. Kissing in the rain. She wanted all of that and more but she knew it was dangerous. Even more dangerous than jumping out of a plane. 

Relationships meant losing. 

Her mother had loved and lost twice. 

Her brother loved and almost lost Spencer. 

She was brave but not that brave. She needed to wake this woman up and send her on her way with a quick kiss on her cheek and a " thanks for the fun , babe ".  She needed to do that but what she did was lay back down and curl up next to her rounded soft so nice smelling body , closing her eyes and thinking , " Damn you , Melinda with your curse ." 

                                          ---------------------------------------

Nigel Hawthorne - Cyrus stood at the open office door of the one man he should stop thinking about in ways that were not at all appropriate.  The one man who starred in way too many of his nightly dreams and was the reason he woke up in wet spots and feeling like a horny teenaged prat. Why this man ? , he wondered as he watched him at his desk , his  head with his thick  greying black hair lowered as he worked through case files and tapped on his laptop. Why this rude sometimes abrasive often snobbish and completely tight assed and anal retentive man that most people didn't even like ? This man who was not even gay or bi ? He was straight and totally out of his bloody damn league....... Nigel was just a nobody from London with no family , no background , no past family history  , no money  ; nothing to offer anyone especially someone like Richard Norland. He had grown up in an orphanage for God's sake ! Abandoned at birth in an alley twenty six years ago with no note , no blanket  , no clothes , no nothing. Even his parents , whoever they might have been , didn't want him. 

His cell phone that he held in his hand beeped with an incoming text message and he glanced down at it. 

Marco : Baby boy , me gorgeous pirate man , come out to play at The Pink Lady. 

Richard looked up. His blue eyes looked surprised and tired as he asked , " Nigel ? Why are you still here ? You work too hard. It is after six. Did you need something ? " 

Nigel swallowed and instinctively touched the eyepatch that covered his one missing eye. " No , sir. I was just leaving. I don't require anything. " 

Richard nodded and returned to his work. Then as his secretary departed his spacious office at Miller , Brandt and Norland his eyes rose back up to watch him leaving. 

Who the hell was Nigel ? , Richard thought not for the first time. And why did he make him think thoughts he never had before ? Especially about men. He wasn't used to feeling like this. This man was turning his life inside out and upside down. Mother was right. He should find a way to discreetly fire him. But for some reason he didn't really want that. He didn't know what he wanted from this man. 

He just knew that he was not gay. That was Spencer. 

Then his cell phone beeped. He looked down and cursed. 

Andrew Norland texted : Your brother was shot ? 

Richard thinned his mouth as he texted back : How did you get my number , Father ? You are supposed to contact Spencer. Not me. I don't need nor want you in my life. Don't contact me again. Goodbye.