Consider Me Gone

Chapter 34.

Jax

It'd been some odd days since my fight with Tara and we were barely speaking. We'd grown cold towards each other and only spoke briefly in front of the boys. It pained me to put on such a display in front of my kids, but I didn't see a way around my fight with Tara.

It had become clear that neither of us was ready to apologize or retract our hurtful words to each other. Tara failed to comprehend how her decision to withhold the truth about Toni's pregnancy constituted an act of betrayal. Instead, she directed her anger towards me for being upset with her, thus perpetuating the cycle of anger between us.

Being angry all the time, especially in my own home was draining. But the solution to my peace didn't truly involve Tara, but more so Toni. I wanted her to tell me the truth, I wanted to know what she'd done to our baby. I felt it was within my rights to know so that we could move on from this.

I've been attempting to find her at her workplace or her apartment, but I haven't had any luck running into her at either location. I was convinced that she was staying with Mark. And although I was eager for a confrontation with him, I just wanted to have a conversation with Toni by herself.

I thought Happy would be able to buy me some time with her, but he'd mentioned to us that he was going to spend some time with his mother. Happy's mom lived about two hours away from Charming in Bakersfield. He visited her often, and before today, I would have thought nothing of it.

However, yesterday I gave Happy a call. I was mostly giving him orders, but in the background of our conversation, I heard a familiar laugh. I was sure it was Toni's when I ended the call, but just to be sure I asked Ratboy if Happy had left Charming with anyone. Rat was with him before he left, so I was hoping that he'd notice if he was with someone else.

Rat mentioned that Happy had gone to Bakersfield with two girls. I assumed nothing of it at first because I just assumed that Happy had gone with his sister Daniella. But then as I continued to think about it, I realized that there was no one else besides Daniella that Happy would allow around his mother.

Happy loved his mother deeply, and didn't bring quick flings around her out of respect. He was a completely different person when he was with his mom, and the only person he allowed to see that side was Toni. Toni got along great with Daniella and would go visit Happy's mom during our marriage. Especially when Happy would do long periods on runs.

I wondered whether it was a wise decision to go to Happy's house. It wasn't because I was afraid, but rather out of respect. I mean, we're talking about Happy, a brother by Patch! It felt a bit odd to just show up at his mom's house without any solid reason.

Happy also didn't like to get involved with my "Toni" drama. He was just as loyal to her as he was to me. He wouldn't let me around her if she asked, and in turn, he would grant me the same respect. I admired their relationship and although I didn't want to drag him into this, I needed answers and there was no way around that.

So, before the sun came up this morning, I rode over to Bakersfield. It was early morning when I finally arrived and I knew that Happy would be on guard toward unexpected visitors. So I gave him a call as I was walking up his driveway.

He was surprised to see me and I saw him let out a sigh the closer I got. "Hey, something wrong? You guys need me to come back?"

"No, no, you're good. I just wanted to talk."

"Oh, okay, shoot."

I looked down awkwardly and then looked back at Happy. "Not to you Hap."

"Jax," he began.

"I know, she doesn't want to speak to me. Probably why she came to hide out here with you, but I just found out some history, and I just want her to clear it up. I promise I'll be gone as soon as I get my answers."