Consider Me Gone

Chapter 37.

Toni

I sat in the departing lounge with Mark as I tried to keep my excitement down. We would be boarding the plane shortly, and my nerves were all over the place. I couldn't believe this was finally happening. I mean, I knew that I wanted to do it, but actually going through with the plan was something I couldn't process.

So much has happened to finally allow me to get to this place. My marriage, my divorce, my solitude, and then as if a reward for all my troubles, Mark. He'd been the man I didn't see coming, a man who only had eyes for me. A man who has stuck by my side through the most chaotic couple of days I've ever gone through.

Most men would have fled at the sight of a crazy ex, but Mark loved me more than Jax's delusions and I was grateful for that.

"Are you ready to leave this place?" Mark asked as he threw his arm around my shoulder. I leaned into him, "More than you'll ever know." Mark chuckled as he placed a kiss on my forehead.

As I stood in the bustling airport, a thought struck me - how many of these countless individuals were bidding farewell to Charming? I couldn't help but ponder on the number of souls who had dared to challenge this quaint town, only to emerge defeated. And amidst them, how many had fallen prey to the deceptive allure of staying?

Despite relocating here as a teenager, I always felt like the town of Charming had witnessed my growth. From making my first friend to experiencing my first real boyfriend, marriage, divorce, and countless other significant moments, this small town holds a special place in my heart.

"Well, you're going to love Seattle. I've been talking non-stop about you, so be prepared for some questions."

"Noted. Who should I be on the lookout for? Who's going to grill me the hardest?"

"Callie," Mark said without hesitation. "I'm sort of her best friend, so she gets super protective."

"Okay," I nodded my head as I tried to prepare for what was going to be said. I'd heard stories about Callie, and although Mark and her had a history, I didn't feel threatened by it. Perhaps because he'd been so open and honest about all of it rather than having me find out later.

"I'm sure you guys are going to get along just fine. You work in the same field, and both of you are strong-headed, so I'm sure you guys will band against me in no time."

I laughed as Mark gave in to premature defeat. It felt good to have these conversations, they reminded me of how different my life had become. No more talks of Nords, One-Niners, Mayans, or any other gang-related wars that went on with the Sons. No more lockdowns, fearing for your life, or getting targeted because you know someone. I was now just a regular civilian and I couldn't be happier.

"Toni?" My heart stopped as I tried to convince myself that the voice I heard was not who I thought it was. But then Mark's grip on my shoulder tightened and I noticed the hairs on his arm stand up.

I slowly deflated when Mark confronted Jax, and random passengers turned their heads in curiosity. "Dude, stay out of this. I need to talk to Toni." Jax's voice was low, a threat was being made and Mark was going to stand for the challenge. However, I couldn't let them get into a fight when we were so close to boarding.

"Mark, honey, it's okay," Mark looked at me for a moment and I gestured towards the amount of people who were staring at us. He knew that getting into a fight could put him on the no-fly list, and neither of us could accommodate that kind of stumbling block right now.

"Okay," Mark placed a kiss on my forehead and then looked at Jax. "You have five minutes, we have to board soon."

Mark got up from his seat and then walked away to leave Jax and me alone. I was furious that he was here because I thought that I'd made myself crystal clear the last time we spoke.

"What are you doing here Jax?"

"I just want to talk," Jax said putting his hands up, "I come in peace."

"Nothing you do is ever peaceful," I muttered.

"If I remember correctly, that's what you used to like most about me," he joked. However, my face remained stoic, and then Jax cleared his throat.

"So, you're really leaving with this guy, huh?"

I let out an exasperated sigh because I was tired of this conversation. There was nothing that Jax could do or say that would make me leave Mark. "This again Jax, really?"

"Yes really Toni," Jax looked around frantically as if the clock was against him. "Toni he's not the one for you. He doesn't know you like I do, he won't be able to make you happy in the long run. I mean sure, right now it's all new, but when the dust settles–"

"I'll still love him," I interjected.

"You love him?" Jax seemed shocked by my confession. The look on his face felt like a mirror to the past, because it was only a few years ago that I too had that look on my face. It's a feeling you don't forget when you hear the person you love declare their love for someone else.

"Yes Jax, I love him."

Jax looked down as I repeated my statement and just when I thought it'd be the end of it. He reached into his pocket and pulled out a ring box. I sat there confused until he opened it and I recognized my old wedding ring.

"What are you doing Jax?" My voice was but a whisper as I looked around frantically at the crowd that was slowly gathering.

"I'm doing what I should have done three years ago. I'm asking for my wife back," Jax slowly slid off his chair and then landed on one knee. It was significant because Jax didn't initially propose to me when we got married. There was no engagement, no show, just a shotgun wedding and a judge who needed to go on his lunch.

"Jax, please don't do this," I begged. I was drowning in embarrassment as people stopped to look at the commotion, and then my eyes landed on Mark who was frozen in place as he watched the interaction.

"Toni," Jax began, ignoring my request. "I know that there is nothing I can do to convince you that I'm a changed man. But through these last couple of weeks, I've realized how much you did for me in our marriage. I don't deserve the woman you were then, and I also don't deserve the woman you are now. But trust me, babe, I'll go above and beyond every day just to earn a fraction of the love you had for me then. So Toni, will you be my wife again?"

The speech was sweet, the gesture was something I'd always wanted but never thought I'd receive from Jax. It was like he was finally giving me everything I wanted from him, but it was three years too late.

"PAGING ALL PASSENGERS ON FLIGHT QUE382 TO SEATTLE, WASHINGTON." The announcer blared through the speaker and the crowd started to fizzle out. If I stayed here any longer, my flight would leave without me.

"What do you say, Toni?" The look in Jax's eyes was filled with hope, and for the first time in a long time, I felt bad for him.

"I'm sorry Jax," I slowly got up as I pulled away from him. The words came out in a whisper but I felt like he heard me loud and clear. His eyes brimmed with tears and I turned away from him as I continued to walk away. I couldn't look back at him. I couldn't face the damage that was behind me.

I couldn't afford to glance back, not after risking it all to reach this point. I've earned every step of this journey, and I have a debt to repay to the shattered soul I was three years ago, by boarding that plane.

"'You ready to start your new life?" Mark said as he held his hand out. I grabbed it and he kissed the back of my hand.

"More than you'll ever know."

THE END.